To get over fear of rejection, think of it as an RPG (role playing game)

[DJ Girevik]

You know what RPGs are right? Think Final Fantasy. Well, one of the main cornerstones of an RPG is that as you fight battles, you gain experience points, and as you gain experience points, you gain levels, and your character becomes stronger in every aspect. Most RPG characters gain levels up to 99.

So what does this have to do with rejection? Simple, get some friends together, and here's how it works: You will all start at level 1. You will try to get phone numbers from attractive girls, be it at school, at the mall, whatever. You need 1 rejection to level up to 2. To reach level 3 you need two more rejections. You need three more to reach level 4, etc etc... and will end up needing 100 to go from level 99 to level 100. The point of needing REJECTIONS to gain levels, is that in this exercise, you make serious attempts to get phone numbers, but rejection runs the game. If you play this game, you will end up with more phone numbers and real life experience than you will know what to do with, and your confidence will get stronger, like an RPG character, and with all your experience in the dating world, your game will go through the roof. Even before you reach very high levels, you will be able to quit the game and end up having no fear of rejection.

If you go really hardcore and reach Level 99, you will have been rejected a whopping 5000 times. By this time, unless you are a complete moron, you will have gotten hundreds of numbers and sarged at loads and loads of locales. If you are a complete moron, you still will have gotten quite a few numbers. Your fear of confidence will be GONE, guaranteed.

What doing this with friends is for is to compete to see who can get a higher experience level faster, but at the same time you always want wingmen. You and your buddies, like I said, should go for the number (don't cheat and try to get rejected) in a serious manner (don't be afraid to try different approaches though), but rejection is how you gain experience. After all, in other games, guys with the most experience in getting rejected had names like Michael Jordan, Cy Young, and Abraham Lincoln.

[edit]Actually, this could also be done with fellow SoSuave posters. Find a buddy or multiple buddies who want to play, and compete with em to get to a higher experience level. Also report on how you're doing getting numbers.

 

[VIVAlasVEGASBaby]

that's one way of looking at it...

 

[Slashco]

It's an interesting analogy, but I don't think you would 'gain levels' by being rejected. If you think about it, an RPG "level" is just a convenient way of quantizing your overall skills and life experience. That's what you want to improve in order to get better.

 

[DJ Girevik]

True, that's why I said that you have to try for the number (not for the rejection) to make it work. You could gain levels by how many phone numbers you get but that doesn't do as much for the fear of rejection. You could go by how many total times you try for the number, but the way I outlined provides different incentives for getting rejection AND numbers.

 

[darkhorse]

Making the gaining of dating experience a game is a decent idea, but you shot yourself in the foot when you mentioned role-playing games. There's an indelible geek taint on role playing games and the people who most often play them. People will probably resist the idea just from the cognitive dissonance that's generated there.

 

[USSOCOM]

darkhorse, lol

 

[DJ Girevik]

Originally posted by darkhorse
Making the gaining of dating experience a game is a decent idea, but you shot yourself in the foot when you mentioned role-playing games. There's an indelible geek taint on role playing games and the people who most often play them. People will probably resist the idea just from the cognitive dissonance that's generated there.

The RPG idea would HELP attract the geek crowd - a crowd more known for having girl problems than other crowds. And not only do I enjoy a good RPG, but some of the hotter girls I know enjoy them even more than I do ^_^

Alucard, ... hmm, actually now that I think about it it's not a bad idea, as long as it doesn't turn into putting hotter girls on pedestals.

 

[Imbrondir]

**Sorta off topic**
RPG games are fun. They exersize your use of your imagination while using it. Try it sometime, you might get surprised (I did). I don't see why anybody would care that alot of geeks, happens to play it as well. Are people afraid they'll stop attracting women, stop being social and convert into geeks?

If it reflects anything, it would be adding more mystery to your character. As in if people know you as, powerlifter, jerk'ish player who also plays RPG games.

 

[Oxide]

oh, please, for your own sake dont play RPG's. Especially online ones. Unltima Online (one of the biggest online games back 2 years ago) sucked 2 years of my life. Of course it was fun at times, but looking back at it, i didnt get SINGLE THING out of it. Now if i lifted wieghts for 2 years, id be much bigger than i am today.

I think the idea is decent, but by level 99 you will talk to girls just get rejected. example :

U - "Hi"
HB- "Hello"
U - "wow, those are the most beautiful eyes ive ever seen"
HB- "oh , thanks"
U - "What is the name of such a cute girl?"
HB -"Jill"
U- "Well, Jill, would you like to have lunch with me sometime?"
HB- "Sure."

DOH..try harder

U - "Actually, hey, can i kiss you?"
HB -" Sure, go ahead"

Fvck!

U- "I mean, hey, lets go have sex"
HB -"Yeah! i got condoms right here!"
U "Uhhh, you know, can you just say no so i leave please? just for me?"

 

[DJ Girevik]

LOL well, by then you'll probably have put the game on hold. And I don't even play computer games. What I was talking about when I said I like RPG's was the good old Super Nintendo/Playstation stuff, mostly Super Nintendo although I lost my AC adaptor about 2 years ago and never got around to going to Radio Shack to get a new one.

And as you can tell by my S/N (if you know Russian) I am a seasoned weightlifter. Girevik is Russian for Kettlebell lifter.

 

[Oxide]

Lol, it is quite funny cause i am Russian, and im not quite sure what your name means? You mean like a fat, big muscle guy? becuase that is the definition i know.

 

[nautica34342]

this is a real good idea. The only part about it i dont like is the rejection part. WHen u approach u should not think at all about being rejected. you should have somethinhg like 3 points for a success and 1 point for effort if u failed. I think someone here should make a game up with scoring that the other djs could go against each other at

 

[The Main Event]

This is a very good idea.

Sure, it adopts a geek concept. Sure, The Main Event has no time for role playing games or people who play them. Sure, it's not the sort of thing I'd want to see taken too far ("Well, I'm at level 5 now, so I can bump up my Charisma rating by a few points and learn the spell, Wait Five Days To Call"). But it comes from the perspective that rejections are necessary evils that make us stronger and better men. The recognition and application of that truth make this a valuable suggestion.

I happen to think that selecting rejections as the basis on which participants gain points is good thinking. It encourages an attitude that sees light at the end of the tunnel. It also recognises that rejections will outnumber successes, and that there is nothing wrong with this; it is the normal state of things.

The obvious counter-argument is that participants are going to glorify rejection and make no effort to improve themselves. Let's be serious... nobody is going to do that, least of all people who are making a conscious effort to bolster their success with women.

One amendment. The whole concept of continually increasing the number of rejections required to "level up" (or whatever the role-playing parlance is; I've never been a fan) ensures that things are going to spiral out of control fairly quickly.

Think about it... To get from level 7 to level 8, you need seven rejections. Somebody who gets their first rejection since levelling up requires another six rejections before they can chalk up another level. For an inexperienced person, that's a lot of rejections before they get their reward.

Much better to have a system like this: You start at level 0. To level up, all you require is 1 rejection. You're making fast progress in these early days, because each rejection is teaching you a lot. When you hit level 10, things get a bit harder. You require 2 rejections for each level-up. Come level 20, you need three rejections to go to level 21, and each level thereafter--until you come to level 30.

You can see where I'm going. By streamlining the level system, you ensure that the psychological reward is never too far out of reach during the early stages of a recovering AFC's growth. You give them plenty of pats on the back to help them through their initial failures, and that can only be a good thing.


I am
The Main Event.