Thoughts, advice?

[Brosy]

This has nothing to do with women, more just curious about some general advice from mature gents.

I've read quite a bit of recommended literature (laws of power, how to win friends, etc) for views and advice on life, work etc. All suggest not talking too much and listening/talking to others about themselves.

Here lies the problem, I am now getting sick to death of hearing about other peoples uninteresting crap, specifically those sorts of people who constantly talk and steer conversations to themselves to the point I just want to avoid them completely.

Are these indirectly the unhappy/unlucky people one of the "laws" tells us the avoid?

Perhaps I have the balance wrong, maybe these thoughts are something I need to push through to improve my tolerance? Interested to hear from anyone who's been here...

 

[Bible_Belt]

not talking too much and listening/talking to others about themselves.

That's so you can get them to do what you want; it's not supposed to be fun. But it requires that the boring person you are listening to have something that you want from them in the first place.

 

[Grisou]

Why should you listen, talk or do anything with someone you find uninteresting?
There are 2 reasons for doing that:
1. You get paid.
2. You get laid.

Sorry for the rhyme. My english is bad, couldn't find any other words.

 

[sodbuster]

Grisou NAILS it for the win! You CAN be courteous to people who bore you, but find better people to hang with if your friends bore you

 

[Brosy]

So simple, unanimously it seems I've lost sight of the actual goal of this exercise!

I do find an alarming amount of people uninteresting, repetitive, boring and selfish... like 90%, is that normal?

 

[taiyuu_otoko]

I do find an alarming amount of people uninteresting, repetitive, boring and selfish... like 90%, is that normal?

Yep. The good news is that when you focus on positive listening skills, you'll differentiate yourself from every other goof out there.

Don't forget the whole six degrees of separation thing.

Obviously, if you're looking to get laid, it won't work too well, but if you're looking for clients, it pays spend few minutes leaving a good impression, hand off a business card, then GTFO.

 

[trent_afc]

I've been there. And I'm still there, almost 10 years after I read/applied Carnegie's logic. On the plus side, I'm genuinely curious in others and I find I can broaden my perspective by asking questions about things that I actually do want to know about...so not all conversations are one-way droning sessions. When those conversations start to materialize, I just stop asking questions and the conversation naturally dies out.

I've also found over that same time that 90% (at least!) of people out there just want to talk about themselves and rarely will pretend to be interested in you or what you think. This is a great way of filtering out people not worthy of continued investment, depending on your desired outcome.

And what Grisou said.