Thoughts About Moving Out

[I'm Joe Dirt]

Well I have decided to move out of my parents house sooner than later, so I have begun planning for it.

I will likely have a roommate, a buddy of mine who also has been wanting to move out for a long time. We've found a number of options ranging from $500-$600 a month for the apartment, so that would be around $250-$300 each.

I have, however, a lot of questions and concerns about moving out, mostly involving costs. I know that in any situation where you want to predict how much something will cost you miss a lot of hidden expenses in planning.

Normally that isnt that important, but in my case, since I don't have a high paying job (if I worked full time, 36-40 hours a week, I'd be making $1,300 a month after taxes), if I plan to move out and a lot of new expenses creep up it might ruin my whole plan. I would hate to be in the position of leaving my house and then having to come crawling back and admitting failure.

So my question, for those of you who have thought about this or have lived on your own, is what kind of expenses should I expect?

The breakdown I have so far is this:

$250 - Rent
$400 - Food
$150 - Transportation (Bus to school and work, No car)
$50 - Cell Phone
$100 - Misc. Bills like internet and electricity or whatever is not included in rent (of course this is just my half of it, since roommate gets the other half)

That totals to $950 a month. If rent is $300 per person then it goes up to $1,000 a month exactly. At my current job, if I go full time, that still leaves me with $300 or so left over, which is cutting it awfully close but do-able. I definitley don't want a plan in which I will break even at the end of the month because then there is no wiggle room for any errors in my calculation.

Now, can anyone tell me if I missed anything or grossly under or over exaggarated?

The food thing is what concerns me, in my original planning I figured $200 or so would be enough, but as me and my friend discussed this we realized that its going to be closer to $400.

What I've decided to do now is write down all my expenses for the week, starting today, in an Excel spreadsheet so I can figure out exactly how much I spend in reality, not just in theory, and also look for ways I can cut down.

So far I am at $3.70 for the week (started this morning) because I bought a McGriddles meal for breakfast.

I figure I'd need to save up $7,000 to $10,000 first before I move out to have a nice cushion in case anything happened to my job or to me that would require some additional expenses. That way, if I lose my job, for example, I wouldnt need one for several months if not half a year or so before I would go broke. This goal for having such a cushion is achievable for me by summer time, which is my ideal time to move.

The main reason I want to move out is that not having your own place can be a big obstacle to being successful with women, at least if you have parents like mine. They are always home not to mention all I have is one bedroom of my own so I can't really have friends over because my parents are always in the living room and my brother is always in the basement.

Getting it on with a girl with my brother and my parents in the house would also be not feasible. My mom tends to be very hospitable so on the few occasions I do have a friend or two over she keeps coming in to offer food, drinks, etc. despite me telling her to leave us the hell alone before hand.

And while right now I can date a lot of girls, there is always problems with getting it to go further because of the lack of available space in which to engage in certain activities. I keep my parents out of my personal business so bringing a girlfriend or something over it would be bad for me. I just wouldnt feel comfortable.

I also think the mental block of living with your parents would be lifted, like I wouldn't have to worry about being hassled to do stuff or take care of stuff. My parents English sucks cause we're immigrants and they always have me do all their calling and stuff for some damn reason, instead of my brother.

I also hate having to tell my parents where I am. I feel like I should have my own privacy and be able to do what I want. I mean I dont have to ask for permission per se, but like sometimes I'd rather not do something like go to a girls house at night than tell my parents where I am. Even lying doesnt work because it creates this whole mental block for me, where I feel like I have to be on guard. I want to just be able to relax and do what I want with no apoligies and no regards for anyone but me.

I think it would also be cool to sarge with my friend and then bring people home at the end of the night, or have girls sleep over occasionaly, another thing that would be very frowned upon if not expressly forbidden with parents in the house.

I feel like if I moved out it would really help my self-improvement efforts, which I have been doing for the last few months activley.

So yeah, those are my reasons, thats my logic, and those are my numbers that I've estimated.

All feedback is welcome.

When I move out I want to be the most prepared person ever. I don't want to fail and then have to move back in with my parents or have to beg them for money or something.

 

[C00L]

i failed and moved back home. no big deal my parents wanted me to move back ahha.

anyway heres some things i learned.

-you cant put a price on personal freedom.
- i lived alone so i cant comment on a roommate situation.
- if i were you id invest in a car first, THEN move out. transportation is key.
- food is no big deal. If you eat out alot, it WILL be MAD expensive. You can buy spaghetti for like 79 cents, breads, lunch meats, oatmeal, cheap meat like steak an chicken breasts etc.
- the most expensive grocery foods are junkfoods. so stay away from that ****.
- have a blast. dont over analyze every little thing. just enjoy it.

 

[I'm Joe Dirt]

Thanks for the advice.

What kind of expenses where you looking at? Did I pretty much cover everything in my little analysis?

With the food, I will have to look at some of those prices of home foods and maybe even shop for myself for a few weeks and see how much I'm spending. Since I am still stuck here at least until next summer I figure this is the safest time to experiment with these things.

Also, as far as the car goes, I figure I will live on a good bus route to school/work (or within walking distance of one of the two). I currently take a bus to school and work (sometimes my brother or my dad drop me off at work), so I am used to it.

My potential rooomate has a car, so I figure if I help him pay gas or something I can take it out once in a while or if we go sarging together it wont matter since we can just go together. The goal for me is going to be to find girls who will come over to my house and cook, clean, and fvck.

I think it would introduce an interesting frame into my game, because my frame wouldnt just be to attract or seduce or whatever for sexual purposes, but to get girls to do my chores and cook for me. Thinking of "I want her to cook me dinner" instead of "I want to bang her" will help me tighten my game I think lol.

What were some of the reasons your plan failed? How long did it last on your own?

Also, when moving back to your folks, was the vibe different? Like are you treated different now that you moved back or are things back to the way they were?

 

[C00L]

i moved an hour away to a metropolitan area. i had 1500 bucks saved up, which was the security deposit and 1 months rent.

i had a 1 bedroom, i payed 635 a month for. I lived there for 3 months. namely due to the expense of the place and i didnt see myself continueing to work 40 hours a week just to pay such an outrageous rent price.

However, those 3 months were ****ing great man, i tell ya.

Seriously tho, id scratch that bus idea...just because your used to it doesnt make it good ;P.

I mean, you dont want to have to rely on your roomie to sarge, or on your roomie for his ride. I know for a fact that if my roomie was trying to throw me 5 bucks for gas to use my car id tell him to go suck a ****, but then again maybe im just an *******.

You covered most of the expenses. Also aren you going to have a housephone? If not your cellphone bill is going to escalate, depending on your plan.

Again i cant stress personal transportation enough. Its the single MOST important thing in living on your own. Trust me, when your in your own place and your limited by the bus line your going to be pissed off. Especially when you just want to cruise around and hit different spots for sarging or whatever your doing.

Meeting a girl somewhere and then cruising to different spots with her, then take her back to the pad. thats how its done. Unless your living in some big ass city like new york or something im stickin with this : Car is Key.


As far as moving back home, well it was a welcoming releif again for about a month. then things sucked ass. My parents own me. they provide me with everything and i am financially dependant on them which blows balls. I realize i need to get out again and im putting together money to do it. this time its gonna be for good.

I suffer from the same problems as you, bringing girls home is just not something i can do. my moms room is right next to mine, my parents are ALWAYS home so theres no alone time...so living on my own is essential to my success in life and with women.

 

[I'm Joe Dirt]

Well I live in Chicago... which is in fact a big city..

I want to get a car, but then insurance and gas would be expensive. It is more economical for me to spend $80 a month on bus to get to school and another $50 or $60 to get to work than pay for gas (probably $20 a week if not more), parking (my school charges several hundred per semester), insurance (at least $100 a month in my age bracket), and maintenance costs (there's always those small repairs that tend to add up over time).

I will definitley look into it though. I might be able to get a car for free, a 92 civic, once my brother gets his new one. It is an old car and not too reliable though, despite being in good shape physically, but I guess if I go out once or twice a week it would do.

I don't really use the phone a lot, so a house phone will probably not be necessary. I already use my cell for every call I make/get, and that usually doesnt amount to more than 400-500 minutes per month at most. Cell plans with those kinds of minutes usually are around $39.95 plus taxes, so I think $50 should cover it. If I move out I might also switch to US Cellular which has free incoming calls.

Not counting rent, how much money did you spend on food, going out, misc things?

 

[C00L]

I spent roughly 300 bucks or so on recreational things. i count eating out, buying clothes/other junk etc as well as other entertainment like concerts or whatever in that.

considering you live in chicago i guess a car would not be essential since chicago has an extensive pub trans system, right? I lived like 5 minutes from the city in a small suburb so i needed a car to get around since i work 15 minutes away in another suburb.

 

[RedPill]

Have to add my two cents here...

Having been out of the house for several years during college, and then moving far away to a big city for the next year after that, I'm back with the 'rents now. I had fun during those years, but decided to move back earlier this year upon realizing that it would be far advantageous for me to move back for a year or two. It was a tough decision. I'm very glad to have failed on my own early (loss of a job), because it taught me so many things. A lot of people I met along the way will be stuck in this loop of roommates, heavy partying, and perpertually being broke until they are in their 30s or knock some girl up. Here's my outlook now.

1. When I leave my parents' house again, it will definitely be permanent. As much as their house is nice and we get along alright I want badly to be back on my own, for all the obvoius reasons (lack of sex, chores, they're always here, etc).

2. Although it makes the cost of living a lot higher, the roommates era of my life is done. I want and need my own cave. Just not gonna put up with other people's friends, trash, noise, and problems anymore. If you get along well, it's like always having your friends over (productivity drops bigtime), and if you don't get along it's pure hell.

3. I could afford to move out right now, but am going to stay with my parents until all my student loans are paid off, and I have a good 8-10k banked. Living here for 1-2 years blows, but it's important to keep in mind how much better I'll be in the long run leaving with financial control. Most people trade in temporary fun for financial stability and it cripples them for life.

4. While I'm here, gonna make the best of it. Since living with my parents for the last 6 months, I've made some massive changes for the better. Fixed my inner game for good. Working out and eating like a champion. Gained 20 lbs of muscle. Started building a business. Ditched all my loser friends. This is a good share of the reason for returning, to get my proverbial sh1t together.

5. I don't want to move out just to be scraping by. Been there done that. It sucks. Will be taking the budgeting very seriously. The idea is to still be able to save once I'm back on my own. Zero-sum budgeting (living hand to mouth) will not get you anywhere in life.

Joe Dirt, the budget you put together seems reasonable given the parameters you specified. It's good you're trying to plan. However, I'd advise against living on a shoestring, that's not the way to go. As much as you want to be on your own, don't let idealism get the best of you. That extra $300 you say you'll have left over for savings is going to get eaten up by all sorts of things. Every now and then, you will have to buy clothing basics. And pay for your laundry. And get a haircut. And the vacuum will break. And maybe there's a few books you want to buy. Maybe your work crew is going to a bar to hang out some friday night, can you afford $20 for that? I think you get the idea...

Like someone else said, eating out is expensive and the cheapest foods are usually the healthy ones. I think you should seriously re-evaluate living without a car. Do you have any health or renters insurance? Those are must-haves. Another thing to consider is how long do you plan on living in this arrangement for? The reason I ask is because if you don't have any sort of plan for increasing your income you'll be stuck relying on a roommate and living without a car for years. Take it from me, trying to make large career strides is highly difficult while being poor, having no transportation, and co-existing with roommates.

Hope this helps.

 

[undesputable]

hey joe dirt this is excatly what i want to do, ane excatly why i want to do it....im still a senior in high school tho and ill probably go to college and wait at least one more year before seriously thinking about moving out.

do you go to college? are you a fulltime student and working?

 

[I'm Joe Dirt]

Great feedback guys! Thanks

In about a year and a half I will be finishing my degree in Management. If I move out this summer, I will be just 1 year away from my degree.

I plan on staying with this arrangement until I finish my degree and get promoted to a higher paying position or to a completley different position, which is basically year and a half to two years tops as of now, which may just be 1 year by the time I move out.

The thing is, if I go full time at work, they will pay my tuition and books, though I might only be able to take 3 classes instead of 4 or 5 at a time.

RedPill, I know what you mean about the scraping by thing. Thats why I figure if I have 7-10k saved up, I can live paycheck to paycheck or with a small cushion and should a major purchase come up like a new fridge or something I could then dip into my fund to cover it.

Like I said, this wouldn't be a permanent thing, just until I get my degree and start making more money. I might stick with it even then, but since at that point I'd be a management major hopefully working in a mangement position that pays $35-$40k a year, living on my own would be a breeze be it all by myself or with this arrangement. The hard part is just gonna be that year and a half or so during which I will be working and going to school.

My hope is that if I stick around in my current position (i've only been working about 2 months so far at this job, I was previously a Sales Rep for HP for a year and a half) I will eventually be up for a promotion to department senior, then supervisor, then manager. In retail (I work at Geek Squad as a technician now), these kinds of promotions happen very quickly for full-timers, and given that I'm doing management in school and all the current management staff loves me and relies on me, I think Im in pretty good shape as far as having a future with the company goes.

 

[penkitten]

seems like you have really been doing thinking and planning.
glad to hear it.

im going to suggest that you start purchasing things that you will need before you move.
things like towels and dishes , broom and mop etc
you should go to a big lots or dollar store

 

[I'm Joe Dirt]

Yeah, good thinking. I will be able to bring a lot of stuff that I already own like my furniture, including a couch. I also have my own computers, HDTV, Home Theather System, etc. that I bought myself. My potential roommate is also going to bring his stuff, so we're gonna have most of that covered.

I guess plates, forks, that kind of thing we will have to look into.

 

[darkmenace]

big city...big rent...and if you want decent place, its at least 1,000 a month.

I moved out of my parents house a year ago, and wow did I see the change.

bills pile up, and the good thing is my utilities are included in the rent. The biggest thing that really piles up though is food. I thought "oh no I'll cook and go to the grocery store everyweek"
Well I did that, but also there are some days when your just a little lazy and a nice late breakfast at IHOP sounds awesome. lol. Dont get me wrong grocery shopping is awesome, but even goin to the supermarket to pick up some juice and and some munchies sets you back at least 30 bucks, and im only talking snacks.

Anyway dude, wait a little longer, get a car, save way more money than you saved, and then move out.

Luckily my student loans are paying for all this, hahaha im in debt for life my man.

Think about this...save about 10,000 or 15,000...sound like a lot, now double it if you wanna live somewhat decent and not on a shoestring.

good luck to ya