Thought I Was Gettin VIBES!!! but apparently I was wrong......

[Pecker]

I see a girl in the cafeteria. I smile, she smiles. I say "You're in my writing class!" She says "Yeah!!!"

We eat together. We eat in a group of 5, but we two are the only ones talking. We talk to each other.

I say "Well next time you go to writing class, make a copy of something for me to read."

She says "I have a copy in my room"

So she invites me up. I go to her room and take the copy. We're sitting on her couch and she gets her laptop and starts playing music. She seems nervous.

Strike #1: She mentions she's bisexual. That kind of irks me for some reason, DESPITE the possibility of a threesome.

Strike #2: She mentions that she is having a relationship with a
57 year old man. Eeeww.

Ok but at this point, she's STILL lookin at me kinda shy and smiling. We're making electic eye contact every now and then. When I think I'm getting serious vibes (I'm hardly wrong) it makes me very confident. So I'm thinking, "Alrightie Pecker, she's no keeper, not worth any fuss. Let's just see if she wants some Peckle Pickle."

Because she seems shy, I just say it: "I wanna kiss you."

She says "Oh really? Didn't you hear I have a lover?"

Me: "You seem like you wanted to be kissed. I just go by what I sense."

She: "I don't want to be lonely. If you kissed me then left I'd feel lonely."

Me: "Well we have Thursday [we planned a coffee date after our writing class]"

She: "(giggles) No....but still call me [I think she thinks I'm smart and wants feedback on her short story]"

Me: "We'll see. If you're good [pointing to the story]"

So then it turns out my wallet fell out of my pocket when I was sitting on her couch. I had to go back up there and get it from her. That interaction wasn't weird, I forget what I said, but it made her laugh.

I really don't feel any shame on this one. I had to try something, and I'm glad I did.

After that, I took this SAMBO class that totally adrenalized me. I can see that really working wonders for my confidence. It was my first class but they I catch on quick. I'm goin tomorrow.

Just an update. Do I have coffee with that bi-girl or not?

 

[elvis aint dead yet]

You dropped your wallet at her place and forgot it?


That's the oldest trick in the book.

 

[chlywly]

Should have stayed the night after kissing her, then she sure as hell wouldnt have to feel lonely

 

[spanky]

Dude, I felt the vibes through your post. You were getting vibes I assure you!

Man, I don't care how shy she is, just still never ask for a kiss. Just kiss her! Even shy girls respect a guy who takes charge. Her being shy makes it even more so.

I don't see how you missed her wanting you to kiss her and stay even longer for some possible deeper action.

What part threw you off from "if you kiss me then left, I would fell lonely?"

Come on, Peck. She basically laid out the red carpet for you.

This story reminds me of the final scene of dumb and dumber when that bus load of hot chicks stop on the road and tell Jim Carrey and Jeff Daniel that they are looking for some guys to oil them down and they eventually send them off.

And don't be so easily thrown off by the "I have a lover." she may have just wanted to see if it was okay with you to have a one night stand. She didn't even call him a boyfriend. Persistence was in order here.

 

[TTAG]

she is still keen, very keen!

Originally posted by spanky
I don't see how you missed her wanting you to kiss her and stay even longer for some possible deeper action.

What part threw you off from "if you kiss me then left, I would fell lonely?"

Come on, Peck. She basically laid out the red carpet for you.

I couldnt of said it better myself!

 

[JJMcLure]

She didn't object to the kiss. You just gave up at the point you could have kissed her. Her responses couldn't even classify as tests/ASD but a chick will expect you to go ahead and take what you want, if you're "worthy". You did OK breezing past the first one, but stopped at the second for some unknown reason.

Shoulda just said "I won't leave" then gone ahead and kissed her.

In future you should just kiss her not ask/tell her first.

"Make the ho say no".

 

[myfriendblu]

Originally posted by Pecker

Because she seems shy, I just say it: "I wanna kiss you."

AHHHHH GOD DAMMIT!!!! DAM DAM. IF one more AFC asks a girl if he can kiss her Im gonna go mad!!!!

Dude, it is EXTREMELY AFC to ask a girl to kiss her. Dude, this isn't 4th grade. You don't EVER EVER ask. Grow a pair, and just kiss her. Asking makes you seem weak, vulnerable, shy and timid. An all around AFC.

This chik has red flags all over the place. Chalk it up to experience and NEXT her.

 

[Pecker]

For your information, Louis and Copeland advocate the "I want to kiss you" line, and it has worked for me twice on different girls in the past three weeks.

I wasn't about to sit there and argue with her, either. Maybe I should have just gone for the kiss, but I was getting a sense of seriousness form her that she didn't want it.

 

[Ice Cold]

Louis and Coperland can suck my ****. Their style work for the old guys with monocles.

What you should've got from her responses:

She wants you
She's wants to be sure you're not just using her for sex

What you should've done is to tell her about some "connection" crap between you and her. And how she would feel your presence even though you weren't actually there. And how you would think about her.

Basic persuation techniques in other words

BTW: She seems like too much baggage. You seem to have other options. You may want to drop her.

 

[spanky]

Originally posted by Ice Cold
Louis and Coperland can suck my ****. Their style work for the old guys with monocles.

Lol.

Man, I said it once around here and I'll say it again, "follow the Dj Bible." It is the best most complete stuff on this subject around. Consider everything else you read as "plan B."

Why take the word of some geeks who wants to make cash off of some poor guys insecurities while avoiding as much criticism from the literary world as possible.

The Bible is written like scientific papers, a bunch of guys who are in the trenches and writing about what they have learned through experience and doing it for free. ...a bunch of different authors who give fleshed out plans from different angles with 90% consensus. And they don't give a damn what the literary world thinks or have editors riding their @$$e$

Take off the monocles.

 

[WatchMeWalk]

Originally posted by Pecker
For your information, Louis and Copeland advocate the "I want to kiss you" line, and it has worked for me twice on different girls in the past three weeks.

Louis and Copeland are snake oil salesmen. They might know how to lay down the basics but the rest of their ****ty book is AFC.

 

[xblitz44x]

"Strike #2: She mentions that she is having a relationship with a
57 year old man. Eeeww."

Uh. Nobody else thought this was weird?

Anyway, you played it just fine. Telling a girl that you want to kiss her is NOT AFC. A girl wouldn't NOT kiss you because asked, if she would have kissed you if you didn't. IN other words it doesn't make a difference. If she was going to kiss you if you didn't ask, she would have kissed you if you did. The seduction community is WARPED on this subject because a few times they probably slipped a kiss or two in there when they didn't ask and it was only because a chick was taken by surprise. When I kiss a girl I want it to be because she's comfortable, ready, and wants to. Not because I slipped it in there when she wasn't paying attention.

Good work though, all around. I agree that you should have stayed with her the night. Definitely have coffee with her. You're doing well.

-Blitz

 

[spanky]

Originally posted by xblitz44x
The seduction community is WARPED on this subject because a few times they probably slipped a kiss or two in there when they didn't ask and it was only because a chick was taken by surprise. When I kiss a girl I want it to be because she's comfortable, ready, and wants to. Not because I slipped it in there when she wasn't paying attention.

The whole community warped?

It is all about the "surprise" and spontaneity, isn't it? Maybe about her wondering what you just might do next?

What happens if you become too predictable and when she knows that she will get "warnings?"

What about the appeal of a man who goes after what he wants?

If you are willing to sacrifice the strength of these..........

 

[xblitz44x]

"It is all about the "surprise" and spontaneity, isn't it? Maybe about her wondering what you just might do next?

What happens if you become too predictable and when she knows that she will get "warnings?"

What about the appeal of a man who goes after what he wants?"

A fat, "ugly" chick approaches you. You're nice to her because you're not a mean guy, you're being friendly. She seems harmless enough. You guys go up to your room to study, since she's in the same class as you and she's VERY smart. You could use the help.

She starts acting a little shady. A little nervous. So it starts making YOU a little nervous. Then she turns around and PLANTS one on you, out of nowhere. She was very spontanious...as spontanious as you can get. Now tell me, sir...WHAT THE FVCK DOES THAT HAVE TO DO WITH ATTRACTION? DO YOU EVEN REALLY KNOW WHERE ATTRACTION COMES FROM??? Ok...now try this.

You're at a club. You're just standing by the bar, watching the tail go by. Then you see A BEAUTIFUL, hot sexy girl, with tan, creamy skin, beautiful hair, straight, white teeth, a rack to die for, pushed up nice with a little bit of glitter on them to maintain your attention. She's wearing a short, leather skirt.

She's walking towards you, and smiles. She says "hi, how are you?" in this sexy petite little voice of hers. God, she's adorable. You start to feel a little uneasy, she's intimidating. She's looking right into your eyes, Licking her wet lips from time to time. You have a conversation and she stops, looks you in the eyes and says in a slow, seductive tone...

"I want... to kiss you right now"

Now what are YOU going to do???? Are you going to not kiss her because she wasn't spontanious???? If you start to date her, and she keeps doing this and says "I want to fvck you right now."...is the attraction going to die off from that? Hell NO! If it dies off it was from an entirely different reason.

And, before you say it, men and women aren't different in respect to attraction. I just posted on this elsewhere. We are equipped with the same conscious and unconscious mind, with the same purpose for attraction. It works the SAME way,...we're the same species.

-Blitz

 

[NMMWCR]

Blitz called it. There are no hard and fast rules, just compulsions that rise up from our subconcious.

Here are the signals you look for to show that a girl has a subconcious compulsion for you (and these are hardwired into our primal brains, she will do it without thinking):

1) She takes a breath. One that is just big enough to straighten her posture and lift her chest ever so slightly.

2) She licks her lips. This one is subtle and easily missed. It's not a tongue all the way out and rolling around her mouth kind of thing, just a quick tongue to lip contact. It's a reflex that moves about like blinking your eyes.

3) She tilts her head ever so slightly, exposing her neck. If she has hair long enough to reach her neck, she will either toss it to the side with the tilt or reach back for a moment to brush it away and let air get underneath.

I promise you, that you will see this from a woman every time if she is into you. I recommend going out somewhere you will see people together and watch the women who are with a guy so you can see it first hand while you are detached.

Lesson: If don't see the breathe, lick, tilt, don't bother. You can "DJ" all you want but you ain't getting any.

 

[spanky]

Blitz, I thought you realized that attraction doesn't work the same for men as it does for women. Okay, you posted it somewhere else but that does not change the fact.

If that was the case, you wouldn't have so many fellas on this board disappointed about the fact that even though they are a nice looking guy with a good career and they are "nice" but they still having trouble getting dates.

Now, you know if you met a woman with all all of these qualities, you would at least date her if you were single. Then what is the difference? Why are so many nice guys around here screaming that they can't get laid?
You will never hear a nice-looking woman screaming that she can't get laid. There is a difference that can't be denied.

Also, I would never advocate kissing anyone who isn't showing some signs of interest or attraction to you in the first place. Where in my previous post did I say "kiss any one you feel like?" Nowhere. You filled in the blanks without asking my views beforehand. Now, I will discuss your views along with mine.

You should kiss those women who you feel there is some sort of rapport with. In the above example, the guy gave no signs of interests to the fat girl that really gave her the green light. If the guy did, she should have went for it if she wanted to and I would have respected her for "going for what she know."

How do we know a woman has rapport with us in the first place? Do we ask? Hell no! We look insecure then and it's something stupid to ask. We simply follow our instincts and vibes( again, if the fat girl got this, then she was in the right. If not, the guy has to watch for the signals he gives). Pecker believed he was getting good vibes and that was his cue..... and so are these:

1). In a group of 5 people, they are the only ones talking and they are talking to each other.

2). She lets him in her "room" to get the copy instead of bringing it out to him.

3). She puts on the music for them.

4). She seems nervous. Why would she be nervous with a guy you invite up to your room and basically lay out the red carpet to him. I will tell you why...she digs the guy.

5). The most important: HE WAS GETTING THE VIBES!

With all of these cues, you don't need to ask for a kiss, dude. You simply go for it.

I thought this was a general understanding at this site, man.

Just because two genders are of the same species does not mean they are attracted to all of the same things..

Ex: Male peacocks flash their tails to attract the females. The females choose the flashiest. Females don't flash a thing.

Also, why do you see so many young females dating older guys and you rarely see it the other way around. After all, you will see a lot of Sean Connery with Catherine Zeta Jones on-screen than Sissy Spacek with Colin Farrell. Could there be a difference in things that attract each gender?


Man, I wonder how many sites are devoted to women trying to learn how to get laid by men or attract more men compared to the same sites for men. Well, since all most half-decent women have to do is just need to squeeze their t*ts around a guy, they don't need it. Simple concepts such as these can help you to realize....

...man, I am sorry, Blitz; there just is no argument here, man. There just isn't. I wanted to accommodate you but..... peace.

 

[Pecker]

Another factor in my "telling" for that kiss. (I didn't ask, I merely stated I wanted to kiss her)...is this:

Her body language was closed at the time. Her elbows were on her knees and to climb over and stretch my neck out to try to kiss her would have been awkward. I didn't interpret this closed body language as a sign of disinterest, just the opposite. I felt like I had to sort of nurture her attraction for me with straightforwardness, and nonthreatening confidence.

 

[xblitz44x]

Seriously, spanky...I'm not even sure what you're arguing. I think there are two issues here:

1) Does attraction work the same for women and men?

2) Will asking for a kiss decrease attraction?

Is that your issues? I'll assume so.

1) "Just because two genders are of the same species does not mean they are attracted to all of the same things.."

I never said they were attracted to the same things, I said the attraction works the same. No two guys are attracted to the same exact things either. But did you ever stop and really think about why think a girl is "hot". What makes her facial structure, her body structure "hot"? Why isn't a fat chick hot to you?

It's all done unconsciously. Men and women both. We see somebody, adn we feel attraction...they match what is "ideal" to us, even if it's just a little bit, and from that, depending on the "resemblance" we attribute certain criteria to them. This is the criteria that we need to integrate ourselves. The more that they naturally expell the polar opposite of us, the more criteria we unconsciously assume, and the more we feel compelled. It's just how it happens. You mentioned people like Sean Connery...apparently he matches her "ideal" in a huge way, she perceives criteria about him, and now she is integrating that in herself. She will feel this attraction until the integration is complete, or until the illusions have dissolved and she see's he's really not the person she thought he was. But she doesn't even realize this is happening because it's all UNCONSCIOUS. And it's triggered off of sight alone.

2) "With all of these cues, you don't need to ask for a kiss, dude. You simply go for it."

You're talking about opinion. Whether he SHOULD or SHOULDN'T talk about the kiss first is a personal opinion. I am talking about the fact that whether he does or doesn't "ask" will not alter her unconscious attraction for him. My story about the fat chick, and the hot chick from the club. What would you do? Would your attraction be altered? Whether or not the fat chick should or shouldn't have tried to kiss him is irrelevant. I'm telling you to play the part of the guy. Would you be attracted to the fat chick if she's spontanious, and would you NOT be attracted to the hot club chick because she wasn't? Just answer that for me please.

You're right, the fat girl had no right trying to kiss him if he didn't give her signs, but that was never the point of the story, the point is that the guy's attraction (or lack thereof) would have NEVER changed even if she was a challenge, mysterious, negged the shyt out of him...etc. I think you're missing that point.

-Blitz

PS: check out www.seducingwomen101.com if you're interested in the attraction process itself.

 

[Pecker]

Here is a new development on that girl. I just ate dinner with her at the cafeteria. Just her and I.

We walked and talked from campus, then ate. We spent a total time of about an hour together talking.

During our dinner she asked "So why did you try to kiss me yesterday?"

I said: "Because I was getting a vibe from you and I just go forward with what I want. I act on impulse." [I didn't say this with a tone of bragging, simply matter-of-fact]

She said: "Okay," and continued to pick at her orange.

I said: "Why do you ask?"

She: "I don't know. It's been on my mind."

I said: "That's funny to me. No offense, but you seem like the kind of girl who could reject a guy and think nothing of it, never think about it again."

She: "Is that just cuz I'm pretty?"

I thought of making some C+F comment about "who says your pretty?" or something. But what I actually said was:

"No, you're distant. Sometimes you're quiet. It takes an effort to really talk to you."

Then she went on and on about how she is vulnerable and defensive and yadda yadda. And I'm nodding and saying I know what she means.

She gives me TONS of big smiles, LOTS of good quiet chemistry moments. She says the sloppy way I eat my food is "cute" and I say "Glad you see it that way." Another moment. Another. Etc. She says "It's not everyday I tell people the things I'm telling you. I like you and I don't know why."

So I go back up to her room AGAIN because I said "Do you have my number?" She said no. I said "You should have it." So I get into her room, she says sit. We chat for two more seconds. I write my number on a piece of paper on her desk. In another moment I tell her I need to leave to be early for my martial arts class (true) and I'm off.

I thought about trying again, but no. I'm playing it cool. I realized I need to regain some trust in her, which I've done. In a little while I'll make the move. I like a challenge, this sort of thing is fun for me.

Off to my SAMBO class. Yesterday we learned a strangle hold that takes 5 seconds to make a man pass out.

 

[Ice Cold]

Originally posted by xblitz44x
"Strike #2: She mentions that she is having a relationship with a
57 year old man. Eeeww."

Uh. Nobody else thought this was weird?
-Blitz

You mean as a sign of whoring, not having a father figure in her childhood and trying to seek it in her sex partners?