This threw me off.... Advise...

[Dingo]

OK.... Like most relationships... ups and downs.... Recently more downs.

Last weekend my woman and I had a pretty good time, good convo and good sex... The weeks communication is a bit tamer than usual but she invites me again over this weekend. Mid week we plan a chill weekend, work around her house, plan out the food and wine.... fun sex...

Then this evening as we text goodnight I get..... "Nite....hey, you know tomorrow we might not....."

WTH ?.... I did not answer back.

This threw me off... Of course I'll escalate but how do handle/answer if she insists on no sex without seeming butt hurt ?

That is totally a new one for me.... I also recognize that she might ambush me to end it....

 

[MillionBillionaire]

Well sometimes a girl can have a yeast infection or a pimple down there.. you never know...

But if a girl is clean down there and she pulls that crap then all signs point to hell and shyt going down hill real fast.

 

[cola]

Well you said your woman so she means more to you than a common plate.
Its unrealistic to expect sex EVERYtime you hangout with your girlfriend.
Now the need for her to text you in advance and tell you this could be a few things:

1. **** Test: She wants to see how you react when she takes sex off the table. If you have been framing this relationship correctly you should have never let her see you pressed for sex. The moment you let her see that you are desperate for sex is the moment she starts using it to control you. Let her initiate sex more than you do, and occassionaly deny her. If your sex is good this will turn her into a strung out junkie for it and you will never have to harrass her for sex. LTRs have to have this dynamic in place.
2. She is on her period, yeast infection, some type of vaginal irritation.. As pointed out by @MillionBillionaire

3. She is screwing someone else tonight and doesn't want 2 penises in her in such a short amount of time.

3 is least likely, but never rule it out with a woman.

• Obviously if she is your woman though, at the beginning of the relationship you told her that regular denial of sex voids the relaltionship for you and will result in you leaving her, unless she has medical reasons. If not you need to have that conversation with her and every girlfriend hereafter. That is far from an unreasonable demand in a relationship and not enough guys make this clear to their female.

Denial of sex from either partner on a regular basis is a form of emotional abuse and should not be tolerated.

 

[BrainDamage92]

she got a backdoor man

 

[Desdinova]

Then this evening as we text goodnight I get..... "Nite....hey, you know tomorrow we might not....."

WTH ?

Many women can tell when their period is going to come. That's probably what it is.

 

[Dingo]

Thanks guys....

I know with 100 % certainty it's not her period or another man..... I'm thinking it may be her way of distancing herself emotionally from the relationship. Things are very complicated. She might just be tired of being the **** buddy.

I just don't get why she wants all the weekend company but not expect me to want sex. If she wants to break up she could easily tell me to take a hike via text... a whole lot easier.

Question.... If it's not all that... I understand the **** test/seeing how I react. If she doesn't initiate.... Do I just ignore and work on her like always ? Seducing her ? I'm not sleeping next to her and not ****ing her.... and I'm definitely not sleeping on the sofa !... lol.

Also... If she texts me that again before I see her what is the best response ? Ignore ? Playfully remind her of how much she likes the **** and to stop ?

I guess I'll find out this evening or sooner. I'll report back.

 

[Dhoulmagus]

I had a short term girlfriend and we were going to go see a concert in town and rent a hotel. Her little sister was going to join, so she said we couldn't have sex. I just ignored it and continued on with my day. Guess what? We had sex lol.

 

[Dingo]

"No interest".... "No pressure"... Self discipline.... Got it...

 

[john1234]

If its on the night , she could be tired.

 

[Dingo]

All good... I followed instructions... Thanks guys....

We had Thai food, nice wine and watched a movie. None of the usual interest or pressure. Some simple kino and didn't push it. Had her asking me sex in the end. I f'd her real good. She is sleeping now.

Now if I can get out of here without any of the relationship talk I'll be golden. Wish me luck on that one... lol

 

[Julian]

just leave while shes passed out. easy enuff.

also bishes be stupid (no sex tonight) lol. Last girl I dated she asked me "do you expect sex everytime we hang out?" my answer was a furtive YES. She fked me everytime we hung out.

 

[Bingo-Player]

oh dear me .....

there are two plays here

1) she doesnt want you to see her as just an opportunity for sex - and therefore requires more reassurance from you

the irony of it all is you will end up giving her this extra reassurance through sex ( if you are good) its all a test

2) what a woman says she wants and what she actually wants are two entirely different things

the amount of times I've been told "we aren't having sex tonight" only to end up railing the same chick is crazy

just go about your business as usual as a man would

this is just female nonsense

 

[Dingo]

oh dear me .....

there are two plays here

1) she doesnt want you to see her as just an opportunity for sex - and therefore requires more reassurance from you

the irony of it all is you will end up giving her this extra reassurance through sex ( if you are good) its all a test

2) what a woman says she wants and what she actually wants are two entirely different things

the amount of times I've been told "we aren't having sex tonight" only to end up railing the same chick is crazy

just go about your business as usual as a man would

this is just female nonsense

Our situation is more complicated but I agree 100%. I will enjoy it while it lasts.