Originally posted by justme20
First off i'd like to say that im a newbie to the C&F thing, it's really woking wonders.. Anyway I know this girl who is very interested im me, her body language is saying "come and get me"!! We are not strangers, in fact we used to work with each other before I transferred to another store. I used to C&F thing on her and it obviously worked, she started initiating conversations with me and such, but when I initiate conversations with her sometimes she just ignores me...or finds a fast way to end the conversation. she'll also act busy when she really isnt...but at the same time she'll hold eye contact with me... i'm thinking I screwed up and started acting like a wuss.. But I can tell shes still interested in me...is she just shy or am I being to hard on her with the C&F?
I dont think this makes a difference but heres some details.. i'm 20, white, shes 18, hispanic.
any suggestions on what to do now will be great!!
Well, I need more details really.
How are you starting the conversations?
What are you doing exactly?
As for the hot-cold treatment, you need to freeze that out. If she isn't going to give you attention, then don't reward her. We don't reinforce bad behavior, do we?
But make sure that when you freeze out you have somewhere nearby to go. Don't just sit there waiting for her. She wins if you do that. Even better if you can turn the freeze into a bit of negging with social proof thrown in.
You: "Hey, that's not your drink, is it? That looks awfully fruity." *wry grin*
Her: "I -like- these."
You: "Well, ok, ok, just make sure you take some insulin to deal with all the sugar." *wink*
Her: *smiles weakly* *turns back*
You (within SECONDS): "Hey, Kate Moss, look at this drink my new friend has."
Kate Moss (turning around): "Huh?"
You: "Doesn't this look fruity?"
Kate Moss: "Well..."
You (to HB): "See? Told you." *grin*
Her: *Getting annoyed*
You: "Waitress, I'll have one of these!" *grin again*
So, you punished her gently for turning her back. (When she does that she gets teased and you pay attention to skinny supermodels). You negged her gently, but then made it clear you were kidding and got the same drink. Plus, you got the social proof from the supermodel. (Kate Moss does hang out at your bar of choice, right?)
Now you can see what she does. If you don't get some IOI out of this, time to go hang out with Kate Moss. Hey, she was good enough for Depp and she can probably score good coke to, if you're into that.