Think I'm being **** tested

[backbreaker]

i remember at my lowest point with her, like 2 weeks after she contacted me for the first time in 2 years... i was so bad I had actually sat down and developed a "foulproof" plan to win this girl. **** was like 3 pages long, and i basically worte it out like a program. if she does this do this and that, don't doihs but do that. I mean, i actually sat down and wrote this **** out. i remember going to sleep every night and going over the plan... and oging yes yes it's going perfectly. she wiould call and i would talk for 4 mintues and then tell her i had to go and hang up and be like "yes i got her" rotfl. she would ask me to pick her up from school and i would tell her i was too busy and i usually was but stilll i usually would make time for her. it was only a matter of time lol.

what.. about... 3 weeks maybe a little later, my business partner goes out of town to buy a new car. he leaves friday and wont 'be back til sunday. at the time we lived together. that day she calls me and asks me to go to a party with her. I mean I'm as happy as a punk in the pen lol, tonight is the night.

funny enojugh, I think i had a chance in retrospect. she made up some BS execuse why we could not gto too the party and insted we just chilled at my place. til like what.. 3am. and the entire time i just could not bring myself to make a move on her. i froze up like lebron in the playoffs ya'll. i mean here she is, on a friday night, sitting in my pad.. we are watching TV.. she's telling me how her BF and her aren't getting alone. and i'm saying dude, kiss her! she wants it "(i think) but i was just too scared to mess things up.

there went the "plan" lol. in retrospect there were a few times i think she was feeling me but i was just too chicken****. the girl was perfect to me and i could not treat her like a normal girl.

 

[floydb25]

We all acted like chumps at one point. Nothing I hear from anyone is suprising in this regard. Even girls told me about their chump days, and all the crazy **** they did to win a guy over.

Check this out... About girls flaking - straight from the snobby cats mouth. I can attest that hot girls think this way.

http://www.girlsaskguys.com/Flirti...interesting-view-on-flaky-girls-interest.html

Notice how she admits to having so many options available that no one really matters to her. Guys love her; she doesn't find them exciting, or worth talking to. She doesn't pursue anyone. There's female comments that repeat the same thing. Unless the guy is "hot", and they want sex. There's no care or heart in their attitude whatsoever. It's all about "I I I; me me me".

This is why I don't deal with hot chicks anymore. Among other reasons.

 

[JoelyBoy]

Check this out... About girls flaking - straight from the snobby cats mouth. I can attest that hot girls think this way.

http://www.girlsaskguys.com/Flirti...interesting-view-on-flaky-girls-interest.html

Wow! well this has just put me off asking girls for their numbers!! I can already think how many numbers i have in my phone but the girls never answered my messages after giving me their numbers!

Thanks for all the advice guys - needless to say i will NOT be messaging this stupid girl again - it's true - she said she's let me know, if she doesn't then she doesn't. She probably is a wh0re too. And she was ****E in bed - lazy and selfish, as in her normal life (just hot, like you said)

 

[HappyHarryHardon]

Almost every good looking girl is and will be trouble. Even if they're nice... guys are still chasing them everyday and making them feel like the hottest b1tch on the planet. I'd choose an average cutie 6/7 over a 10 anyday.

 

[JoelyBoy]

yeah see the problem with that is settling for less, yeah a cool average looking girl is definitely easier to talk to and more eager but after a few weeks, when there was not a strong physical attraction in the first place, it starts to get in the way (i find anyway) i just don't wanna be with a girl i don't really feel physically. And i know this is problematic in itself!

 

[LoneWolf]

Better get use to it. Good looking girls are way too much trouble. It just doesn't work man. Go for a cutie. Hotties are for one night stands or casual flings. If you can put up with them for that long, lol.

 

[the_stig]

Floyd - your posts are right on the money and should be required reading around here.

 

[backbreaker]

Floyd - your posts are right on the money and should be required reading around here.

no, no they are not. in fact this entire thread is full of so much fail it's out of control. telling guys to not deal with a woman becuase of the fact that she happens to be very attractive.

first of all, dealing with that statement in itself, there are different ways to be hot. a hot woman that grew up in new york city is not going to act the same as a hot women who grew up on a farm where she was one of 2 or 3 seriously hot women in town and had EVERY man's attention. also, what if she was bigger or unattractive for the vast majority of her life and grew into a bird. I have seen pictures of my wife in high school, at that point she had inch thick glasses, no body to speak of and was rail thin. she was the girl in the back of the class that while not ugly was not the girl you found sexually attractive. eventually she grew her hair out, her body came along and she ditched the glasses and figured out how to dress.

on the other hand, what makes you think every "6 or 7" has always been a "6 or 7" and is going to act "cute" around you all the time. you think a girl's attitude towards men is going to change if she was homecoming queen / voted hottest girl in school and now 6 or 7 years later she has put on 15 or so pounds and isn't as hot, when she is used to getting everything she has ever wanted from a man?

last but not least, what you find hot, other men may not find hot. the women that really do it for me, are women with very long legs and have very slim bodies. i don't do tits and ass. face / legs. so a woman that may be a 7 to you may be an 8.5 to me. so is there a national DJ accordance chart that i have to go by before i can look at a woman and tell if is a woman i can talk to.


the fact is, this post.. this thread is nothing more, than a play on what you were doing before you got here. you are creating buffers to provent from being rejected, which is the oldest AFC trick in the book. just beucase you are now posting it on a DJ forum does not make you enlighted or make you smart or make you good with women or mean you understand women. by cutting out half the field and focusing on the women you think are more likely to accept your advances, you are trying to prevent from being rejected. that in essence, is a buffer. it's NO different than writing stupid poetry, no different than taking a woman out to eat all the time.


you just need to grow some damn nuts. understand that every woman you talk to is not going to be into you. **** I'm hot and I got shot down all the damn time. way more than I did not get shot down. b ut you talk to enough women you get used to it and you do not take it personally and you eventually find women who will not shot you down. you are letting your fear of rejection run your dating life.

I remember my very very very first sarge session when i was 21 years old. i went out and in a month tried to get 100 rejection. i got rejected like my first 7 or 8 times. the very first girl who gave me my number, was actually the hottest girl i had approached to that time. i actually knew her from hs and she was the homecoming queen my senior year and a girl i had a serious serious crush on. not only did she give me her number, she was happy to do so, and followed me around like a wet dog the rest of the night at the bar i was at and we sat up a date and went out a few times . she had an EX she was still in love with so it didn't go too far but still. you miss 100 % of the shots you don't take.


then, I must ask you.. if you are content on settling for avg women who you are quasi attracted to, why are you here? serious question. if you are content with accepting everyone elses left overs, what is the point in spending time on this forum when you are going to just pick through the garbage anyway?


look, stop being so butthurt over girls rejecting you. if you keep at it and keep bettering yourself you will get rejected less and less. when i sold cars a long time ago i would have to approach 10 people to sale 1 car. i would get rejected 9 times. so my goal everyday was to get rejected 9 times. if i got rejected 9 times in a day i was quite sure i was going to sale a car.

you cannot have one without hte other. you cannot have success without rejection. stop being afraid of being rejected. so the fvck what a woman isn't into you. there are going to be women you aren't into just the same

 

[pyros]

fdsds

 

[Iceberg]

the fact is, this post.. this thread is nothing more, than a play on what you were doing before you got here. you are creating buffers to provent from being rejected, which is the oldest AFC trick in the book.

I saw the direction this thread was heading, and I was going to leave it alone because I've been in these "settle for average girls" debates before. But I'm getting drawn back in by the truth backbreaker is putting down.

The whole "i dont wanna date hot girls" act is just a defense mechanism. And a blatantly obvious one at that.

Almost every good looking girl is and will be trouble. Even if they're nice... guys are still chasing them everyday and making them feel like the hottest b1tch on the planet. I'd choose an average cutie 6/7 over a 10 anyday.

This is why I don't deal with hot chicks anymore. Among other reasons.

Better get use to it. Good looking girls are way too much trouble. It just doesn't work man. Go for a cutie. Hotties are for one night stands or casual flings. If you can put up with them for that long, lol.

When I read things like this, it's pretty terrifying. As you all can see, I've been on this site for 10 years. Really longer. And I never thought of this as a "dating site". It's an ambition site. This isn't PUA. It's teaching people to become better men so they can reach their goals...dating and otherwise.

So when I hear someone say "Oh, I'd much rather have an average looking girl. Hot girls are b!tchy / catty / have too many options." it's like saying..."I don't want to reach the top level of my profession because all that money and power is too stressful to maintain." or "I don't want to go on the greatest vacation ever because it makes it harder to come back home" or "i dont want to be a great artist because it's too much pressure to stay great"

It's basically saying that you want to be an average man with average accomplishments because anything beyond that requires too much effort. Which also makes me realize that...wow, a lot of the guys who visit this site aren't on the mission of becoming a great man. They're just here to learn how to get one girlfriend. Getting and maintaining one average looking girlfriend is all these guys want. It's all think they deserve and it's all they think they can achieve.

How sad is that? A series of men congratulating each other on pursuing a goal of women who they define as "Average" because they're afraid of what might happen while dating someone they define as "hot".

And that's aside from the flawed theory of: average-looking girl = great personality. That's so not f**king true. In fact, you know what the worst feeling is?.....It's when you're dating a girl who is below your standards, and SHE dumps you too. Just like these hypothetical hot girls would. That's when your ego really takes a bruise.

 

[Chamber36]

hot chicks are better

 

[The_411]

No woman is theoretically out of reach.

Filtering is still important as is being able to walk at any time.

You want a hot woman? You better be able to make her desperate for you.

She gets offers all the time.

It's about having the game to deal with such a hot woman.

I know because I've seen friends operate and the key is always that they don't really care. Women aren't important and certainly not as important as their buddies.

Simply eliminating women because you don't think they're too hot and weill cause drama then you're crazy.

If a woman demonstrates she's too much drama etc then you dismiss her whether she's a 2 or 9.5.

You can't give her more rope because she's hotter because you've given your power away.

 

[floydb25]

I'm just wondering where the idea of being rejected by hot chicks came from - if backbreaker's post was directed towards me. If so, you are assuming way too much; everything you've suggested about me is wrong.

I've dated these girls for years. As have my friends. This isn't a defensive mechanism to save my ego, and tell myself its better to not get involved with them - because I can't get them. Like saying, "oh, they're not worth it anyway; shallow, stuck up *****es are only interested in *******s and douche bags". This isn't about saving face, or my pride. Nor is it blaming women for my own short-comings.

I've had these girls, and know what they're like. They would approach me, even. I wasn't trying, getting rejected, and crying about it - then thinking I know everything about women, becoming bitter, and coming up with all these irrational conclusions about them, or anything of the sort. This is not at all the case. In fact, its the exact opposite.

These are first-hand experiences. I've gotten involved with them. They were interested. There was no rejection. They're simply not worth the trouble; the maintenance, the entitlement, the headaches, the stupidity, the shallowness, etc. The bitterness comes from dealing with them - not being rejected and unaccepted by them. Big difference.

I strongly disagree about settling for leftovers with cute-average girls. It's the other way around. The hot girls have been used and abused, ****ed by everyone, have multiple kids from multiple guys, dated bad boy *******s for years, and NOW want to settle down with the average nice guy. You have it backwards. Most of these girls also won't change - they just want a nice guy. It doesn't mean they're nice girls, and many of them are bullies.

The fact is, the cute nice girls are far better than the hot *****es. Most *****es are hot, because they can be. These people have no substance. No intelligence. No nothing. Everyone in our group dated them for years, and the results were always the same. Even if some of us wanted a relationship - these girls weren't capable, or worth being in one with. You can try, but its futile. Not many people could stand them in general. This didn't stop them from complaining and feeling entitled to a good guy, of course.

This, of course, doesn't apply to everyone. Nothing does. It's just the odds are much greater when you lower your standards. Much like how upping the age usually results in more maturity. Not always, but the odds are much greater. It's best to go with the odds than search for the diamond in the rough. I searched for years. It's not worth it - when you have a whole slew of decent, nice girls right in front of you. They far outweigh the bad ones - you just don't realize it when all you focus on is a certain kind of (hot) girl.

This doesn't mean she has to be ugly or average. She can be attractive or cute. Just not hot or gorgeous. There's a big difference; no one is talking extremes, or settling for overweight ugly girls. It's all about balance, really. Not all cute, older women are going to be nice, decent people, either. Nothing is definite.

I know girls who felt the same way. After years of dealing with hot guys - they wouldn't get involved with them anymore. Not that there weren't some good ones - they were just done. Too many bad experiences, too much drama, too much of a spoiled attitude, too much cheating, too much arrogance and lack of care, etc. I sometimes would ask girls why they dated a guy who was so seemingly average, when you knew they could get better, and they always said he treats me so good - whereas the hot guys treated them like trash. It works both ways.

 

[Chamber36]

In my experience hot girls are much nicer. I know already said so, but I seriously cannot agree with what's being said here.

Maybe you need to simplify the problem, or write it down in mathematical language. But I don't get it.

 

[Alex DeLarge]

Dude, why are you gonna waste your money on a girl who is not even interested in you sexually? Fvck that!

This girl is not even friends with you. She flaked on you a bunch of times and did not even contact you for a year? She does not deserve your time or money! Go find a girl who likes you for you and does deserve your time.

 

[Chamber36]

Whoever thinks hot girls are *****es, listen to this.

Skip to 12:00. Tariq will explain how the dimes are easier to talk to.

I'm glad someone with authority can explain this for me. So soak up the game.

 

[JoelyBoy]

Dude, why are you gonna waste your money on a girl who is not even interested in you sexually? Fvck that!

This girl is not even friends with you. She flaked on you a bunch of times and did not even contact you for a year? She does not deserve your time or money! Go find a girl who likes you for you and does deserve your time.

I really agree with this one. She actually did treat me like sh1te after She was the one who came after me (twice!) coz i'm a DJ and i guess she liked the thought of bagging someone with some good social proof.

 

[JoelyBoy]

and wtf man i'm a popular dj in the town i live in and i still am too pu55y to talk to girls coz of rejection. p1sses me off so much its untrue. i work out all the time have a good body, i also work in TV as a sound recordist (so my name is on tv in the credits all the time) and still im a pu55y when it comes to girls. there have to be some underlying problems here, im an angry guy