So basically I met this girl 2 years ago, we dated shortly but she cut things off and went back to her ex.
Late last year she breaks up with her ex again and starts reaching out to me around February.
I jumped back in enthusiastically because to me she's near a 10/10. Beautiful face, D cup breasts and amazing body, shared interests, etc.
From the beginning she makes things slightly difficult. Some flaky aloof behavior. Some hot/cold. I pushed through it pretty easily because I had other plates. Around 3rd meetup I finally get the bang. Amazing and the tightest girl I've been with to boot. Lets me hit it raw (Yeah stupid on my part...)
4th meetup we take some MDMA together....because of its effects she spills all her secrets to me:
• Grew up in emotionless home with strict domineering unloving father that basically held her in captivity
• Hates her father
• Strict religious environment as a child
• Multiple suicide attempts, cutting scars
• Tattoos that are hidden close to her genital area
• Had never been in a relationship longer than about 2 years and dated abusers and psychos
• Admitted anxiety and low self esteem
• Magical thinking, thought she had "witchy powers" and believed in a lot of woo woo stuff
• Strong opinions, often irrational ones like thinking caffeine is "bad" and arguing about it
Before she spilled all this I had zero suspicion. Outwardly she was amazingly feminine, kind, sweet. Had a "good girl" persona and seemed very innocent and naive. Think Zooey from 500 Days of Summer (which many cite as an example of BPD...and ironically enough she compared herself to her and it was her favorite film) but even hotter. Never any kind of outbursts or mood swings I could detect when I was around her, just seemed like I had found a unicorn.
Yeah I know, RED FLAGS GALORE but I was under her spell. Anyways, after this I thought she'd become closer to me since she had opened up but quite the opposite occurred...she became distant. Ghosted me for about 2 weeks. We hung out 2 more times after but both times she gave me very strong resistance when I tried for sex, and something felt different. Before she was extremely DTF. Looking back I'm thinking perhaps her fear of closeness/intimacy kicked in after she revealed all her cards to me, as fear of closeness/vulnerability is an element of BPD.
Days after our last date she texts me saying though she finds me very attractive and loves my personality that something didn't "feel quite right" and she was going to back off dating me.
Needless to say I was extremely bummed out because she's so damn hot and I thought things were progressing well...I was beating myself up a bit thinking did I goof somewhere like not pushing through her LMR and getting sex on the last hangout etc...that's when I came across info on BPD. Some things matched up but there was no outward rage and a lot of symptoms didn't seem to connect. Then I found info on BPD Waifs and it was BINGO. Almost everything lined up perfectly and she seems like a textbook case.
After the many horror stories about BPD I've read in the past few days I feel like I got off very lucky. Seems she cut me loose due to fear before things got serious. What sucks is that even though I feel like I dodged a bullet I still feel such massive disappointment and withdrawl at the moment. The way she smelled, the sex, the beauty, everything was so intoxicating. Seriously like a drug addiction and I wish I could have just gotten a few more bang sessions.
The waif/quiet variety of BPD is absolutely frightening to me...it's so hard to detect. I would easily have been pulled into a relationship with her had she not gotten scared off or spilled all her secrets to me. The info I found on BPD from this forum was invaluable and I just wanted to share my experience as well.
One last thing I want to ponder is why does it seem like BPDs in general seem to be so attractive, as in 8+ in looks? It really puzzles me. Or maybe the extremely attractive ones are the ones that more men get enmeshed with since they are so hot and the uglies are too ugly to run their games on men.
Late last year she breaks up with her ex again and starts reaching out to me around February.
I jumped back in enthusiastically because to me she's near a 10/10. Beautiful face, D cup breasts and amazing body, shared interests, etc.
From the beginning she makes things slightly difficult. Some flaky aloof behavior. Some hot/cold. I pushed through it pretty easily because I had other plates. Around 3rd meetup I finally get the bang. Amazing and the tightest girl I've been with to boot. Lets me hit it raw (Yeah stupid on my part...)
4th meetup we take some MDMA together....because of its effects she spills all her secrets to me:
• Grew up in emotionless home with strict domineering unloving father that basically held her in captivity
• Hates her father
• Strict religious environment as a child
• Multiple suicide attempts, cutting scars
• Tattoos that are hidden close to her genital area
• Had never been in a relationship longer than about 2 years and dated abusers and psychos
• Admitted anxiety and low self esteem
• Magical thinking, thought she had "witchy powers" and believed in a lot of woo woo stuff
• Strong opinions, often irrational ones like thinking caffeine is "bad" and arguing about it
Before she spilled all this I had zero suspicion. Outwardly she was amazingly feminine, kind, sweet. Had a "good girl" persona and seemed very innocent and naive. Think Zooey from 500 Days of Summer (which many cite as an example of BPD...and ironically enough she compared herself to her and it was her favorite film) but even hotter. Never any kind of outbursts or mood swings I could detect when I was around her, just seemed like I had found a unicorn.
Yeah I know, RED FLAGS GALORE but I was under her spell. Anyways, after this I thought she'd become closer to me since she had opened up but quite the opposite occurred...she became distant. Ghosted me for about 2 weeks. We hung out 2 more times after but both times she gave me very strong resistance when I tried for sex, and something felt different. Before she was extremely DTF. Looking back I'm thinking perhaps her fear of closeness/intimacy kicked in after she revealed all her cards to me, as fear of closeness/vulnerability is an element of BPD.
Days after our last date she texts me saying though she finds me very attractive and loves my personality that something didn't "feel quite right" and she was going to back off dating me.
Needless to say I was extremely bummed out because she's so damn hot and I thought things were progressing well...I was beating myself up a bit thinking did I goof somewhere like not pushing through her LMR and getting sex on the last hangout etc...that's when I came across info on BPD. Some things matched up but there was no outward rage and a lot of symptoms didn't seem to connect. Then I found info on BPD Waifs and it was BINGO. Almost everything lined up perfectly and she seems like a textbook case.
After the many horror stories about BPD I've read in the past few days I feel like I got off very lucky. Seems she cut me loose due to fear before things got serious. What sucks is that even though I feel like I dodged a bullet I still feel such massive disappointment and withdrawl at the moment. The way she smelled, the sex, the beauty, everything was so intoxicating. Seriously like a drug addiction and I wish I could have just gotten a few more bang sessions.
The waif/quiet variety of BPD is absolutely frightening to me...it's so hard to detect. I would easily have been pulled into a relationship with her had she not gotten scared off or spilled all her secrets to me. The info I found on BPD from this forum was invaluable and I just wanted to share my experience as well.
One last thing I want to ponder is why does it seem like BPDs in general seem to be so attractive, as in 8+ in looks? It really puzzles me. Or maybe the extremely attractive ones are the ones that more men get enmeshed with since they are so hot and the uglies are too ugly to run their games on men.
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