Things Women Never Say

[Mike32ct]

I don't have a boyfriend.

Let's just enjoy each other's company and not worry about where this relationship is going.

Hand me the hammer, drill, and screwdriver. And turn on Phox News so I can watch it while I'm working.

 

[Bible_Belt]

Diamonds are overrated. I would be just as happy with cubic zirconia.

 

[Bible_Belt]

I'm a NASCAR driver who doesn't crash all the time.

Show us your t!ts!

When I have a problem with a woman, I walk right up to her and solve it then and there. What's the point of talking about her behind her back?

When I was in high school they let a girl be on the wrestling team. Man was that b!tch horrible. She always lost in ten seconds. What a stupid idea that was to let her wrestle.

I went to Amsterdam and got oral sex from a prostitute.

I was so fvcking drunk when I shot that deer that the recoil knocked me out of the tree.

 

[VladPatton]

"Those swell fellas from SoSuave.net seem like they really know their shyt!"