Things some men do that turn me off

[JoanofArc]

Hi all,

I m from HK & new to this site. I m a girl so I guess I don't really belong here. But I m really interested in understanding men and their pickup styles. I used to read books on PUA and I can tell when guys use those tactics on me.

Here are a few mistakes men made that actually turned me off - and I just closed files after these happened: ( I m not the type of person who gives many chances)

1. Trying to analyze me in every little detail on first date
2. Telling me about the hot women he used to date
3. Commenting on the way I did my makeup or the way I dress - and suggested me to do something different
4. Complaining about the prices of the restaurant
5. Asked me to pick a restaurant but he didn't like my choice so he asked me to find more options for him to choose instead
6. Turned his head to look at the pretty girl who sat behind him many times while he was with me in the restaurant
7. Went to business trip for few days , no calls or texts and only talked to me after he's back
8. Told me he had just slept with another girl few days ago and she's hot
9. Told me that girls went after him and offered him sex so he did not need to work much to get into their pants
10. Told me how women should behave
11. Being overly confident about the way he looks
12. Over emphasized the size of his wallet
13. Talks to me like I m ignorant or naive
14. Offered help but forced me to date him in return
15. Showed my pics to his friends and told me what they say abt the way I look and worse - the size of my breasts

Just a few examples - what are your thoughts?

 

[JoanofArc]

that would turn any woman off.

apparently chinese guys have 0 game.

did LiveFreex send you here by any chance? lol

dated Western guys... they made some of those mistakes as well :

number 2, 7, 10, 11, 14

I came to this website when i was looking for tips to stay celibate. lol

I have been single for more than a year and havent had sex during this time - I want to stay this way because I hate feeling attached and vulnerable but feel a bit uncertain lately.

 

[crazyboy]

well number 7 and 11 are just dumb. I mean if im on a business trip i don't have to call you your not my wife or gf. 2. so what if man overtly confident in his dress maybe he bought the new outfit for date and think he looks good ohh no. the rest are reasonable but like brad said if men act like you most yall women would be at home draining your battery on your vibrator and cuddling up to your pillow and teddy bears. just saying. And you sound needy as hell so probably you best you stay celibate and not date.

 

[mynameisntNigel]

I agree, doing those things is just selfish and wrong.

 

[sharkbeat]

stuff

Nice reply. Sometimes it's easy to ask the other person to give more.

I m not the type of person who gives many chances

If you want to be picky with your dates, that's fine. However, it's one mindset that will certainly lead you to failure. Not giving many chances imply that you are not very forgiving to mistakes. You expect the person to be fairy-tale perfect, able to execute perfection every single waking moment, from the day you met him, till the day you both die holding hands together.

You must be young, and perhaps your biological clock hasn't ticked yet. Life isn't so fair and it's a lot more harsh for men, which a lot of women don't quite realize how hard it is to be men. Once you hit 30, not only you get the biological clock ticks louder, you will start feeling the injustices that men have had since they were boys. Women take a lot of things for granted, especially here in the western world, but they expect more from men, and at the same time they demand certain rights to be taken away from men, for "equality".

Do you know that men also suffer from stresses?
Do you know that men can also get depressions?
Do you know that men can say the wrong thing though that's exactly not what's in his heart?
Do you know that men can "zone-out" at certain moments and make mistakes?

There are always brash men, and immature men, just as there are *****es and gold-diggers. Some of the qualities that you list out belong to them. These, however, are some that can lead you to unnecessary frictions in your future relationships with men:

4. Complaining about the prices of the restaurant
7. Went to business trip for few days , no calls or texts and only talked to me after he's back
10. Told me how women should behave
14. Offered help but forced me to date him in return

#4: If the man is paying for the food, he has ALL the rights to complain about the prices. You, as someone who just receive, have no right whatsoever to be angry about it, unless you pay for the food.

#7: Give another person their space is sometimes the right thing to do. If you unnecessarily complain that he isn't giving you daily updates, you just started a ding in your relationship.

#10: You just did it yourself. Don't be a hypocrite. We are all telling each other how to behave.

#14: And you wonder why chivalry is dead? Women nowadays don't want to be forced to date, but they still want to receive help. If you don't want to be forced to date that's fine, but we won't help either, therefore chivalry is dying. Now, what if you got the perfect situation, he offered for help but at the same time didn't ask you to date him, are you going to secretly wished he did?

See the problems?

 

[Suspens]

did FedEx send you here by any chance? lol

Haha . That's how I saw it at first.

14. Offered help but forced me to date him in return

Hehe, dat sneaky Nice-Guy tactic.


Actually some of the things you listed here are on the list of some "things-to-do" PUA guides.

 

[LMFAO]

You have the signature of Belle de Jour, inspired by an escort?

I lived in China in the past and the culture there (Asian culture in general) is very different to the West. The girls there are on the extreme end of materialistic. They expect guys to take them to fancy restaurants and whatever else without paying a penny themselves. Wine and dine them to their heart's content while they are just sitting there like pretty little innocent flowers. The beta culture there is rather extraordinary.

Your list is complete nonsense for the most part and no PUA should take that as his guidebook in any way shape of form. It's amazing how some girls aren't self aware enough to know what turns them on, or are just plain not willing to admit it. In particular, having self confidence in abundance is a great trait to have for attracting women.