The Zen of Indifference.........

[gixxer]

How does a man remove desire and craving from his life while still remaining aggressive in his career and his personal pursuits?

I'm very goal oriented and that seems a bit crazy to me - even though I'm well versed in eastern thought.

Removing craving and desire from the sphere of women I can understand as they are a distraction and I view them as I view unhealthy food, drugs and alcohol - unhealthy distractions that always lead away from true happiness and success.

gixx

 

[GirlCrazy]

With true Zen, yes, you totally eliminate desire. That basically makes you a monk. Who wants to be a monk? Not me.

For the rest of us, I would say the goal is to have complete self control over your desires / emotions / impulses. You don't eliminate desire, but you manage and control it. This will set you apart from most people, who don't have that level of self-control.

You don't have to be a navy seal, or a monk, or a black belt to master yourself. It can be done by anyone, given enough practice.

 

[MrLuvr]

Originally posted by GirlCrazy
With true Zen, yes, you totally eliminate desire. That basically makes you a monk. Who wants to be a monk? Not me.

For the rest of us, I would say the goal is to have complete self control over your desires / emotions / impulses. You don't eliminate desire, but you manage and control it. This will set you apart from most people, who don't have that level of self-control.

You don't have to be a navy seal, or a monk, or a black belt to master yourself. It can be done by anyone, given enough practice.

Buddhism proposes the middle way. So neither extreme ascetism nor extreme indulgence of the senses.

The point when it comes to women relates to the attachments we have. We "cling" to them, we desire them, we try to possess them. That is what must be conquered. We should be like a mirror. When the object is removed from in front of the mirror, the reflection is gone as well. Because everything passes, a beautiful woman, stunning scenery, a great meal. Whatever it is, it does not last forever. So, when it is gone, we must let it go. Instead we try to cling to it even more. We try to recreate the experience. We want more. And this is what causes the suffering.

Zen says that is is that desire and that craving that causes us the suffering. It is in our mind and we can remove it if we so choose.

 

[GirlCrazy]

Originally posted by MrLuvr
Buddhism proposes the middle way. So neither extreme ascetism nor extreme indulgence of the senses.

The point when it comes to women relates to the attachments we have. We "cling" to them, we desire them, we try to possess them. That is what must be conquered. We should be like a mirror. When the object is removed from in front of the mirror, the reflection is gone as well. Because everything passes, a beautiful woman, stunning scenery, a great meal. Whatever it is, it does not last forever. So, when it is gone, we must let it go. Instead we try to cling to it even more. We try to recreate the experience. We want more. And this is what causes the suffering.

Zen says that is is that desire and that craving that causes us the suffering. It is in our mind and we can remove it if we so choose.

Good stuff! Thanks for clarifying.

 

[iveyleeger]

How does a man remove desire and craving from his life while still remaining aggressive in his career and his personal pursuits?

So that was my question for you, zen master gixx!

I've been very good at showing no emotion, and having them chase me, but turning the corner is the problem.

 

[SELF-MASTERY]

secondly stop with all the in a perfect world stuff. In the real world you live in called earth leadership is about domination. The strong dominate the weak. Doesnt matter how anyone "feels" about it that is how it is. It is what it is.

I don't understand how you extracted a hint of idealism from my post. The best teachers and leaders make their subordinates want to do better. Pure domination breeds resentment: with women; with children; with nations.

I understand, the majority of the men here once lived lives as emotional floor mats for women. The message of alphaness, pookism, and "be a real man", is so empowering that it causes the weak to go overboard. Sure there are times when we NEED to dominate others, but it isn't the best method to getting what you want. I think pure domination is the most crude and elementary way to control others. Persuasion is such an art form.....

Please don't post anything saying that I'm a p****y, you dont me.

 

[Royal Elite]

As you get wiser the law of "practicaility" rules. If it works do it, if it don't dont do it. To many people live there lives in what should be instead of what actually is. I don't care if a person shouldnt be attacking you for no reason, if he is you can fight back or take a beating yelling you shouldn't be doing this. I read something that said "it doesn't matter if you don't like playing games with women you are, so you might as well win".

I don't care about the leader should treat everybody as equals crap, I care about winning, nothing more nothing less. Therefore the laws of practicaility is extremely important in my life. IT IS WHAT IT IS!

 

[Jaun_Don]

This post has been on my mind all day and made me think a lot more positively I see things a lot more clearly after reading this it was kind of the mantra I have been looking for, in the back of my mind I have known that I need something to tell me to not care about things so much (esp with females) and this seems to have done it...thank you...I have even made amends with my room mate again and we were laughing ang giving each other **** just like the old days...there is no point holding a grudge or resenting her anymore I wouldn't want to live with someone like that so why should she, you know the damage is done but it's all in the past and we just move forward.