rakishness
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Sep 16, 2006
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Wow...Haven't posted on here in a LONG time. I'm sure this place has changed a lot. New members and such. You guys should def read this article. I've posted it before (long time ago). But after reading a few posts on here this def needs a repost.
"The Rise of Players and the Decline of Providers
Why is it that "bad boys" are generally much more sexually successful
than "nice guys" are? Intelligent, hard-working men who contribute to
society in formerly respectable careers like engineering, accounting or
science are now looked down upon by women. Athletes, rockers, rappers
and actors don't work to improve society, yet many women desire sex with
them. There is no longer a connection between a man's contribution to
society, his options with women and his social status. Further, a man's
ability and willingness to provide for a wife and children has little
impact on his ability to attract women. This was not always the case.
How Women Choose Men
Women's attraction has shifted from dependable, nice provider men to
exciting, unpredictable "bad boys." In order to understand this
phenonmenon, one must understand how women choose men and how the
process of mate selection evolved.
Millions of years ago, when our primate ancestors lived in small bands,
the males who were the strongest, most aggressive fighters dominated the
group. Because of the differential in male and female parental
investment (Discussed in There is No Longer Someone for Everyone),
competition among males was a winner-take-all affair. The winners, the
alpha males, were able to monopolize sexual access to the females and
have many offspring. The beta males were rarely able to have sex and
rarely able to pass on their genes. Females thus developed an
instinctual attraction to the physically strong "alpha" males because
alpha male offspring were consistently more successful in the
reproductive game. These instincts evolved over millions of years and
still exist in today's women even though the attributes that made a
winning fighter in primitive Africa are counterproductive to success in
modern society. (For more information on sex and evolutionary
psychology, see Matt Ridley's The Red Queen, Jared Diamond's Why is Sex
Fun? and Robert Wright's The Moral Animal.)
Fighting is no longer a part of daily life, yet today's women still have
an instinctual attraction to strong, muscular men. Aggressive,
unpredictable men are exciting and attractive to today's women, even
though in the information age, the ability to cooperate and work with
others in an quiet office environment is more useful to one's career
success. Women are also attracted to indicators of high testosterone,
like square jaws and broad shoulders. Evolution instilled these
instinctual desires over millions of years, while civilization has
existed for only a tiny fraction of evolutionary time. At an unconscious
level, today's women are still deeply attracted to alpha male
characteristics.
For men, sexual attraction has also been irrationally shaped by
evolution. In primitive times, one of the most common threats to a man's
offspring was infant mortality during childbirth. Because of this, men
developed an instinctual attraction to women with wide, child-bearing
hips. In modern society, infant mortality is rare, but men still have a
vestigial attraction to women with the ideal waist-hip ratio. Men also
have an attraction to women with large breasts since infant
malnourishment was a problem in distant evolutionary times. In the
developed countries of today, few infants starve, and many women don't
breastfeed at all. The male obession with physical attributes is an
evolutionary relic. However, because attractive prehistoric females did
not have the same destructive behavior as our male ancestors, men do not
have the same irrational attraction to physicality and aggression that
women do.
The Development of the Provider
So, if women are attracted to physically dominant alpha male types, then
how could geeky-looking, physically weak men ever evolve? The
development of the "provider" type came about because of the development
of intelligence within our human ancestry. As the predecessors of homo
sapiens evolved greater intelligence, human babies were born less
mature, and the time required to raise a human child required
increasingly more time and resources. In most animal species, babies are
born nearly self-sufficient. Within a few months, most other animal
species can live independently of their parents. In contrast, a human
baby is completely dependent for food and defense for at least five
years after birth, and requires education and resources for many years
after that.
As human babies took longer to raise, females found that they alone
could not provide the resources necessary to support their children into
adulthood. They needed help, and they found ways to get help. Beta males
who were not physically strong enough to dominate the other males found
that by providing food and other resources to females in the group, they
could bargain for sex from those females.
Interestingly, the same high testosterone that provided alpha males with
greater physical strength and natural aggressiveness worked against them
as providers. Studies have shown that men with high testosterone have
lower intelligence and less ability to concentrate on mental tasks.
High-testosterone men are less likely to hold white-collar jobs, more
likely to hold jobs that require manual labor, and are more likely to
commit crime. (See Heroes, Rogues and Lovers: Testosterone and
Behavior.) Thus a spectrum of men emerged. Strong, aggressive,
dominating men existed on one side of the spectrum and intelligent,
nice, cooperative men existed on the other.
Eventually as civilization developed and intelligence and financial
success became more important than physical strength, females who chose
males with "provider" characteristics produced more successful offspring
than those who chose alpha males. Over time, there was a reduction in
the proportion of high-testosterone males. Social and religious customs
like the monogamous marriage system further increased the proportion of
providers. Women looking for lifelong commitment and wanting to avoid a
lifetime of unhappy marriage put a higher priority on companions with
agreeable personalities and financial resources and a lower priority on
looks and alpha maleness. In the last forty years, however, that trend
has been reversed. (Note: Men making a lifelong commitment under the
monogamous system were also more likely to value a woman's companionship
and personality than men who are pursuing short-term sex, where physical
appearance is of primary importance.)
The Pill, the Provider and the Alpha Male
In recent years, the nice provider personality has become decidedly
unpopular, while the aggressive alpha male personality types are
celebrated and envied. Professional athletes, rock bands, and hip hop
musicians have eclipsed doctors, lawyers and engineers in social status.
"Players" who take advantage of the weaknesses in women's sexual
instincts are celebrated while faithful providers are not.
Over the last forty years, birth control has removed the practical
reasons for a woman to choose a provider male (See The Pill and the
Decline of Dating and Marriage). Women unafraid of pregnancy can have
sex with the sexiest men and fulfill their instinctual desires without
apparent consequence. They can "follow their hearts," even when the
emotions they perceive as love or passion are irrational vestiges from
the evolutionary past. Providers are also devalued because financially
self-sufficient women no longer need a man to provide resources for them.
Because women no longer put a high value on providers, the social
position of those men has fallen while the player/alpha male personality
type has begun to dominate society and culture. As women encourage more
"bad boy" behavior by their sexual choices, men and society are becoming
less considerate, less cooperative and less civilized."
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ENwpDa7hluU
"The Rise of Players and the Decline of Providers
Why is it that "bad boys" are generally much more sexually successful
than "nice guys" are? Intelligent, hard-working men who contribute to
society in formerly respectable careers like engineering, accounting or
science are now looked down upon by women. Athletes, rockers, rappers
and actors don't work to improve society, yet many women desire sex with
them. There is no longer a connection between a man's contribution to
society, his options with women and his social status. Further, a man's
ability and willingness to provide for a wife and children has little
impact on his ability to attract women. This was not always the case.
How Women Choose Men
Women's attraction has shifted from dependable, nice provider men to
exciting, unpredictable "bad boys." In order to understand this
phenonmenon, one must understand how women choose men and how the
process of mate selection evolved.
Millions of years ago, when our primate ancestors lived in small bands,
the males who were the strongest, most aggressive fighters dominated the
group. Because of the differential in male and female parental
investment (Discussed in There is No Longer Someone for Everyone),
competition among males was a winner-take-all affair. The winners, the
alpha males, were able to monopolize sexual access to the females and
have many offspring. The beta males were rarely able to have sex and
rarely able to pass on their genes. Females thus developed an
instinctual attraction to the physically strong "alpha" males because
alpha male offspring were consistently more successful in the
reproductive game. These instincts evolved over millions of years and
still exist in today's women even though the attributes that made a
winning fighter in primitive Africa are counterproductive to success in
modern society. (For more information on sex and evolutionary
psychology, see Matt Ridley's The Red Queen, Jared Diamond's Why is Sex
Fun? and Robert Wright's The Moral Animal.)
Fighting is no longer a part of daily life, yet today's women still have
an instinctual attraction to strong, muscular men. Aggressive,
unpredictable men are exciting and attractive to today's women, even
though in the information age, the ability to cooperate and work with
others in an quiet office environment is more useful to one's career
success. Women are also attracted to indicators of high testosterone,
like square jaws and broad shoulders. Evolution instilled these
instinctual desires over millions of years, while civilization has
existed for only a tiny fraction of evolutionary time. At an unconscious
level, today's women are still deeply attracted to alpha male
characteristics.
For men, sexual attraction has also been irrationally shaped by
evolution. In primitive times, one of the most common threats to a man's
offspring was infant mortality during childbirth. Because of this, men
developed an instinctual attraction to women with wide, child-bearing
hips. In modern society, infant mortality is rare, but men still have a
vestigial attraction to women with the ideal waist-hip ratio. Men also
have an attraction to women with large breasts since infant
malnourishment was a problem in distant evolutionary times. In the
developed countries of today, few infants starve, and many women don't
breastfeed at all. The male obession with physical attributes is an
evolutionary relic. However, because attractive prehistoric females did
not have the same destructive behavior as our male ancestors, men do not
have the same irrational attraction to physicality and aggression that
women do.
The Development of the Provider
So, if women are attracted to physically dominant alpha male types, then
how could geeky-looking, physically weak men ever evolve? The
development of the "provider" type came about because of the development
of intelligence within our human ancestry. As the predecessors of homo
sapiens evolved greater intelligence, human babies were born less
mature, and the time required to raise a human child required
increasingly more time and resources. In most animal species, babies are
born nearly self-sufficient. Within a few months, most other animal
species can live independently of their parents. In contrast, a human
baby is completely dependent for food and defense for at least five
years after birth, and requires education and resources for many years
after that.
As human babies took longer to raise, females found that they alone
could not provide the resources necessary to support their children into
adulthood. They needed help, and they found ways to get help. Beta males
who were not physically strong enough to dominate the other males found
that by providing food and other resources to females in the group, they
could bargain for sex from those females.
Interestingly, the same high testosterone that provided alpha males with
greater physical strength and natural aggressiveness worked against them
as providers. Studies have shown that men with high testosterone have
lower intelligence and less ability to concentrate on mental tasks.
High-testosterone men are less likely to hold white-collar jobs, more
likely to hold jobs that require manual labor, and are more likely to
commit crime. (See Heroes, Rogues and Lovers: Testosterone and
Behavior.) Thus a spectrum of men emerged. Strong, aggressive,
dominating men existed on one side of the spectrum and intelligent,
nice, cooperative men existed on the other.
Eventually as civilization developed and intelligence and financial
success became more important than physical strength, females who chose
males with "provider" characteristics produced more successful offspring
than those who chose alpha males. Over time, there was a reduction in
the proportion of high-testosterone males. Social and religious customs
like the monogamous marriage system further increased the proportion of
providers. Women looking for lifelong commitment and wanting to avoid a
lifetime of unhappy marriage put a higher priority on companions with
agreeable personalities and financial resources and a lower priority on
looks and alpha maleness. In the last forty years, however, that trend
has been reversed. (Note: Men making a lifelong commitment under the
monogamous system were also more likely to value a woman's companionship
and personality than men who are pursuing short-term sex, where physical
appearance is of primary importance.)
The Pill, the Provider and the Alpha Male
In recent years, the nice provider personality has become decidedly
unpopular, while the aggressive alpha male personality types are
celebrated and envied. Professional athletes, rock bands, and hip hop
musicians have eclipsed doctors, lawyers and engineers in social status.
"Players" who take advantage of the weaknesses in women's sexual
instincts are celebrated while faithful providers are not.
Over the last forty years, birth control has removed the practical
reasons for a woman to choose a provider male (See The Pill and the
Decline of Dating and Marriage). Women unafraid of pregnancy can have
sex with the sexiest men and fulfill their instinctual desires without
apparent consequence. They can "follow their hearts," even when the
emotions they perceive as love or passion are irrational vestiges from
the evolutionary past. Providers are also devalued because financially
self-sufficient women no longer need a man to provide resources for them.
Because women no longer put a high value on providers, the social
position of those men has fallen while the player/alpha male personality
type has begun to dominate society and culture. As women encourage more
"bad boy" behavior by their sexual choices, men and society are becoming
less considerate, less cooperative and less civilized."
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ENwpDa7hluU
