Tomorrow you are going to wake up with a wonderful idea. You will race out of bed, turn on your computer, and begin authoring an important document. It will be a detailed description of Mrs. Don Juan, the woman you will eventually marry, but have yet to meet.
Using your imagination, you will profile her age, physical characteristics, education and career goals. You will describe her personality, demeanor, interests, likes and dislikes. You will profile her life experiences and how she has dealt with adversity.
More importantly, you will describe her personal flaws. (Remember this isn’t a fantasy girl, this your future wife.) You will detail flaws in her appearance, personality and character. You will also describe how at some point in her life, she recognized those flaws and how she has made positive efforts to minimize them.
Most importantly, you will put your own ego and desires aside and describe what Mrs. Don Juan requires and desires from you. This will be the toughest part of the document to write, but it will not be complete unless you do it. You will realistically describe everything that she wants from you with as much detail as when you described everything you wanted from her.
After completing the document, you will print out a small copy and keep it with you in your wallet. That way, Mrs. Don Juan will always be with you and a part of you.
You will then come to the realization that the two of you will never meet unless you improve yourself in order meet her requirements and desires as stated in the last portion of your document. You will develop a self-improvement regimen based on two proven reality factors:
1) Women need men with Confidence, Control, and Challenge.
2) Women want men with Looks, Money, and Power.
The first place you’ll head off to is the gym. While working out, you’ll experience instant improvements in your posture, thus enhancing your Confidence. The better-looking body will come in time. After the first workout, you’ll go to the men’s section of the local store. You’ll stock up on some hair and skin products. Perhaps buy some cologne. When you come back home you’ll see that rising stack of bills on your table, so you pull out the old check book and resolve to take better care of your finances and organize your time. Phase One of your relationship with Mrs. Don Juan will have begun.
Months will pass and you’ll start to see some results from your hard work. Your body will be more fit, you will have adopted a more clean and neat appearance and your financial improvements will have created a sizable amount of disposable income. You will resolve to read more books thus enhancing your overall knowledge and vocabulary. You’ll resolve to spend more time around people, thus learning social skills and how to exude charisma. You will no longer hesitate in asking a woman for her home phone number. The increase in your level of self-confidence will have eliminated your fear of risk-taking. You’ll enjoy the process of constantly growing and improving. No longer will you be doing it for Mrs. Don Juan. You’ll be improving yourself, for yourself.
More months will pass and you will have eliminated the personal flaws in your own character and replaced them better, more productive habits. You won’t date as often as your buddies, but the few dates you do go on will always be with interested women, because you will have long since learned to show Control and Challenge by screening the losers out. You will be at peace with yourself and be just an overall happier person, thus more popular. You will posses Power not just from your personal accomplishments, but also from the quality relationships you will have developed with close friends and family.
You will be a complete man. You will have satisfied all of Mrs. Don Juan’s requirements and desires. Only then will she appear to you in the flesh. You’ll pull the document out of your wallet and be utterly amazed. She will be almost everything that you described in your profile of her long ago. Phase Two of your relationship with her will then begin.
When the two of you are married and on your honeymoon, Mrs. Don Juan will often refer to the moment she saw you for the first time as the moment when the relationship began for her. She’ll say it was “love at first sight”. She won’t be lying when she says that. That will just be her perspective of things.
You, however, will know that you simply passed her physical attraction test when she met you for the first time. But for you, the relationship with her will have begun long before then. It will have begun when you resolved to become everything Mrs. Don Juan wants and needs out of a husband, with no respect to your own ego.
We as guys tend to often think that relationships begin only after we’ve banged her. Not true.
The relationship begins before you meet her.
[This message has been edited by Survivor (edited 07-04-2001).]
