First, if you had all of the answers, you wouldn't need to ask, so I think looking outside of yourself for some answers is good. Some people think that if they are having difficulties in this area of life that there's something wrong with them. I'm here to tell you there's absolutely nothing wrong with you. Many guys have had to deal with similar issues. It's simply a matter of learning better habits and unlearning bad habits.
If I had to give you a plan of action, it would be this. For the next few months, simply become comfortable having conversations with people. Women, men, old people, young people. Just practice being social. In the DJ Bible there should be a section on conversation skills. Come up with a few normal conversational topics to use, based on what you've read.
Read the sections on attitude also. Just read them and ponder on them. But as far as action, don't practice using touch during conversation, YET. Spend the next two to three months practicing your conversation skills. Get to the point where talking with women is no big deal. You're not trying to get dates, YET. You practice in this low-pressure manner for 2 to 3 months.
After that, once you're comfortable talking with men and women, you can practice closing in slightly on a woman's personal space. From months 3 to 5, you continue practicing conversation skills, but you add in eye contact and entering a woman's personal space a little at a time. You do this if the conversation is going really well. Just move a few inches closer to her. Notice if she moves closer to you. If she does, during your conversation, maybe if she's being warm and friendly, at some point, while maintaining eye contact, she will probably begin touching your arm during conversation. You can simply reciprocate at some point by using conversational touch. If you need to know how to do it properly, look up Darren Brown videos on youtube and notice how he uses conversational touch.
You can mimic the quality of his conversational touch but simply use it less frequently than he does. His style of touch is usually soft and non-threatening. You don't have to use touch as MUCH as he does, but mimic the quality of his touches. No hard slaps on the back. Gentle, non-threatening, friendly conversational touch.
But the first 2-3 months, focus on conversation and attitude ONLY. Then layer in additional things as you continue practicing what you've already become good at.
