The problem

[Overklock]

Well to begin with, I'm on the journey of self-improvement in almost every aspect of my life. Socially, emotionally, spiritually, even sexually. I'm a 17 year old male who's in his last year of highschool. The previous 3 years are irrelevant and I won't be going into much detail about that as I believe that I wasted 3 years doing nothing productive or memorable with my life.

A bit about me: Short (5'6), medium body (more fat, but I have muscles that are shy haha), not the BEST in appearance (I know the "limitation" to my looks), however, I was a ladies man back in the day (elementary school etc.). I'm an average performing (in my opinion; around 80%+ average student, working incredibly hard to do very well for my grade 12 year).
About my personality: I can't really say but what I've been told is (I hope I don't come off as overconfident/****y or braggy): I'm hilarious, very charismatic, smart, generally a fun guy to be around because I'm not embarrassed about many things (so I do dumb stuff to make people laugh cause I actually like making people laugh, seeing others smile is something I enjoy seeing, I swear i'm not cheesy).

Pretty much, as I said before, I want this to be my best year of high school. I think in order to do that is obviously get good grades cause my future matters more than most things, break my comfort zone but more importantly, build very strong friendships with everyone, mostly the girls I find attractive.

I've read tons of articles here, the Book of Pook (masterpiece), and Weapons of Mass Seduction, but lack the confidence to do anything (I feel like this is cause of my acne which had a detrimental affect on me since time, and yes, I do clean up myself etc. so I am trying my best to remove these little devils). Additionally, a big reason why I want to build lasting friendships is because in grade 8, I used to be close with EVERYONE, all the girls enjoyed talking to me but unfortunately, with grade 9, I distanced with everyone.

So now, it's been the 3rd day of grade 12, I am sick and tired of being a p***y and I want and need help. I've joined extracurriculars and have gotten cool with people through that as well. There is two girls I'm attracted to right now, one I tried messaging after mustering up the courage, and I got "seened" on facebook which was unexpected. Now I say "mustered up the courage" because I am a TERRIBLE messager, I actually am an amazing conversationalist, but when it comes to messaging someone, I just CAN'T do it, which is something I'm trying to get over.

Attractive Girl #2: To sum, she was in my summer school class, made her laugh, she messaged for some help, I helped while also cracking jokes and leaving a positive vibe (well, that's just me, I try to make sure I release a positive aura around me). Fast forward- ~2/3 weeks after summer school finished, i messaged asking her what song she wanted me to listen to again and she told me. Now keep in mind I really want to get close to this chick if anything (not friendzoned, not brozoned, idc if it's a relationship, if something does occur between us, i'll be glad). But the problem, this chick is more higher on the social scale in my opinion (i guess you can say i'm putting her on a pedestal). But she is one of the more popular girls and I want to become close with this chick.

So I'm asking for tips on my life AND for this girl (keeping in mind that I can't message for sh*t and that i'm a great conversationalist in real life, but I DO NOT have this girl in any of my classes and nor do I see her much but when I do, it's when we're moving to our next period class).

Sorry for the lengthy post but I need an outside opinion on this. Thanks.

 

[Eph]

Keep the messages and texts to a minimum. Everyone interprets written words in their own way, so you may not come off the way you want to. On that note, keep the jokes within your messages to a minimum as well. Try to message these girls only when you want to set up a date.

Next, two things you need to work on: social circle and moving fast. High School is all about your social circle, and perceived value. People are so superficial that they only care about who you know and hang out with, and how valuable they think you are. You've got the right idea trying to befriend everyone, but just remember after High School, no one really cares how many friends you have. It's beneficial to be friends with everyone now.

You can work on your perceived value by dressing better, knowing cool places or people, etc. Just make sure you back up your perceived value with real value. Combine these two aspects and getting laid (or relationships) in High School is a cake walk.

You also need to work on escalating faster with girls you're attracted to, though. Your window of opportunity closes sooner than you think. So, ask these girls out as soon as you can.

 

[Overklock]

I see, but do you think my window of opportunity with this chick has closed? I mean, I don't got her in any of my classes and the only time I will ever get to see her again is most likely for extracurriculars if she decides to apply for the same ones I am. I consider myself a nice dresser I mean, I dress kinda carefree (like sweats) but that's because they're comfortable and I like them. But, going up on the social scale is difficult because I don't think i know how. I'm cool with many of the "popular" guys, but I don't necessarily want to be apart of their group. This girl is my main goal for now.

EDIT: I'm not worried about how she perceives the text message, I'm just worried that I may end up bothering her, I'll get seened, or I may come off as desperate. I don't mind messaging as even if I fail with this one, the experience will be a benefit for me.

Thanks for the reply though.

 

[Eph]

I see, but do you think my window of opportunity with this chick has closed? I mean, I don't got her in any of my classes and the only time I will ever get to see her again is most likely for extracurriculars if she decides to apply for the same ones I am. I consider myself a nice dresser I mean, I dress kinda carefree (like sweats) but that's because they're comfortable and I like them. But, going up on the social scale is difficult because I don't think i know how. I'm cool with many of the "popular" guys, but I don't necessarily want to be apart of their group. This girl is my main goal for now.

EDIT: I'm not worried about how she perceives the text message, I'm just worried that I may end up bothering her, I'll get seened, or I may come off as desperate. I don't mind messaging as even if I fail with this one, the experience will be a benefit for me.

Thanks for the reply though.

Do I think your window of opportunity has closed with her? I can't say. I don't know her as well as you do, and I don't know the full story. So, you have to find out. Ask her out. If she says she can't make it, flakes, etc, without making a counter-offer, you have your answer. I'm not a "1 strike and you're out" kind of guy, so, I'd give her another chance, but if she blows that, I'm done. You can give her (and others) as many chances as you want. Just don't waste your time.

As for the dressing, class it up a bit. You don't need to walk around in a suit, but a polo shirt, jeans, and either some casual shoes or dress shoes are both casual and still manage to look nice. Show her and everyone around you, you are on another level than them. To females, "carefree" means lazy or apathetic. Hint: girls don't want lazy/apathetic guys. Dressing up more plays into the "perceived value" thing I mentioned.

In regards to the social ladder, you don't need necessarily need to be best friends with the popular students. Just be one of the guys everyone knows (for good reasons). The type that gets invited to parties, or seemingly, everyone goes to for help with various things. Be the guy everyone tells stories about something cool, or funny, he did. Be a valuable guy. You don't need to abandon your true group of friends for this, and you shouldn't.

Lastly, never make getting any woman on Earth your main goal. She could be Kate Upton, Scarlett Johanson, or whoever, but she still shouldn't be your main goal. No matter what it is, you need a goal that has nothing to do with women. Your life comes first. Hobbies, interests, whatever it is comes before them. As long as you have things to keep you busy, and you pull women into this magical world you constructed, you will always been seen as interesting (or cool) in their eyes.

 

[Overklock]

Ah, sorry, I didn't say it clearly. In terms of all the females, she's probably the most attractive in the school, hence the reason why she's my goal (in terms of getting girls) so I can at least prove to myself I am capable of something rather than nothing. Additionally, I've always been told that high school girls dig sweatpants (but I do wear jeans) and I only started wear sweatpants from grade 10.

Also, i'm not sure if asking her out is a good idea when she and I barely know each other...unless I'm mistaken. Don't you think I should maybe play it "safe" due to the fact that high school chicks are COMPLETELY different than older ones (college etc.) and care about their reputation more than their life. There was another kid who tried to hit on her and asked her to the movies but she rejected him (but this kid, unfortunately, was a loser and didn't know what he was doing). I essentially want to stand out and be unique.

Sorry if you got lost, I was on a stream of consciousness there. Haha. Take care and thanks for the reply!

 

[No.Danny]

Ah, sorry, I didn't say it clearly. In terms of all the females, she's probably the most attractive in the school, hence the reason why she's my goal (in terms of getting girls) so I can at least prove to myself I am capable of something rather than nothing. Additionally, I've always been told that high school girls dig sweatpants (but I do wear jeans) and I only started wear sweatpants from grade 10.

Also, i'm not sure if asking her out is a good idea when she and I barely know each other...unless I'm mistaken. Don't you think I should maybe play it "safe" due to the fact that high school chicks are COMPLETELY different than older ones (college etc.) and care about their reputation more than their life. There was another kid who tried to hit on her and asked her to the movies but she rejected him (but this kid, unfortunately, was a loser and didn't know what he was doing). I essentially want to stand out and be unique.

Sorry if you got lost, I was on a stream of consciousness there. Haha. Take care and thanks for the reply!

Wtf!!???:crackup: :crackup:

 

[Overklock]

Yeah. apparently that's the case. LOL.

 

[No.Danny]

I can't even begin to explain the ridiculousness on that statement.

 

[Eph]

It is a pretty ridiculous statement. High school kids don't know what the fvck they're talking about, and the ones that know what they're doing, have no clue what they're doing right.

Anyway, yeah, don't do cold approaches in high school. Like I said, high school is all about social circle game. So, get to know her a bit more. Hang out with her, talk to her, make jokes, etc, but flirt with her while you're doing it. Let her know you're interested without ever actually saying it. On that note, never actually tell her you like her. It kills the mystery.

Every time you're hanging out with her one on one, treat it like a date. You don't need to call it a date, but still treat it like one. And try to stay away from her when she's in a bad mood. People tend to associate feelings (good and bad) with whoever they're with. So, if she's having a good time, she'll feel it's because of you. Or, if she's in a bad mood, whether it's because of you or not, you become the problem.

Also, hang out with other girls, even while you go after this one. Girls want what other girls want.

 

[Overklock]

Thanks for the advice, I appreciate it greatly.