The problem with "clubbing"

[WestCoaster]

OK, I don't go "clubbing" that much, but prefer to meet women at the gym, in night class, at work, etc.

I was just wondering the positives of it, especially in trying to meet women.

I would say 75 percent of the problems on this board result to a bad experience while "clubbing."

The capper was the woman who threw beer in a guy's face (only an American beyotch) would do this, IMO. Then her AFC friends chiming in ... sick.

I was wondering if some of you guys need to change your game and game plan as in look for women in other places, especially if you're an undergraduate in college you should never have to go clubbing to meet women. They're very approachable in class.

I have read very, very few positive experiences of people going clubbing from this site. The bars, taverns, dance places all seem very negative. I know, it's fun and all ... well, it's supposed to be fun.

It doesn't appear this is a good route to go. Plus, you don't always meet the most healthy women there -- physically or mentally healthy.

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

Clubs are for hos who are desperately seeking attention and looking to get in the place for free and then get free drinks from chumps!!!!

 

[Trance]

In a gym or other hobbie place like that, you will meet a few girls, and maybe get 1 or 2 in a year long, because you cant make too much of a mess cause they know eachother there.

In a club you can aproach like 10 women a night that wont put in cause the next one you aproach cause they dont know eachother, and at this rate you will bang AT LEAST 1 a month. Beside you only see them once in your life so if it goes wrong, you wont have to see her everyday like at work or gym, and your reputation wont be harmed!! Meanwhile you can still go to the "non club" places like gym and that, but clubing is essencial

So make some math.

 

[Genghis Juan]

For the most part, scoping for girls in clubs and most dive bars is like going fishing in polluted water. Even if you get a catch, it won't be worth it.

 

[WestCoaster]

If clubbing is essential, so is eating at McD's

Doing the math in the numbers game is like going to McDonald's. You can eat more than a fancy restaurant because it's cheaper, but the food makes you sick.

Like the fishing analogy, too, Genghis!

 

[Señor Fingers]

Okay, I tried to be diplomatic about your anti-American thread, but now you have crossed the line!

I have had many great experiences in clubs. In fact most of my FRs take place in party settings. So I have to refute your claim that clubs are a negative environment for pickups.

I will agree that you will find healthier women at gyms and smarter women at libraries. Thats common sense.

But I disagree that you should impose your preferences on other people.

We came here to empower ourselves to get WHAT WE WANT. There is no right or wrong in terms of options and paths we choose, it all depends on our preferences!

Dont go to the gym to pick up women. Go because you sincerely enjoy going FOR YOUR OWN SAKE! Same with clubs. If you are not a party guy, then why pretend you are just for the sake of scoring some ass?

Personally I LOVE clubs! It is a place where everyone can forget about their labels, titles and troubles and enjoy some good times and flow with the music. Sure there are many who go just to get wasted on booze or profile like a bunch of snobs. But I have found that if you enjoy music and dancing enough, you will run into other people who do as well and will often end up dancing with them long after all the drunks have passed out and the snobs have gone home.

You want a good woman? Than chase your passions and you will find her a lot easier! Evaluate your life and interests and find a woman who will suit them, not the other way around.

Lastly, I think an important step towards manhood is deciding exactly what you want in your life and going for it, so kudos to you on this. Just remember that we all have different dreams!

 

[Chemistry]

Its true...

The club isn't really a bad place but it's not THE meeting place which it often gets built up to be... I mean how many guys go out sayin "I'm goin out to pull", then head to a club night... I've not heard that comment from guys who are simply headin into the city in the daytime...

You only get a limited selection of people to choose from basically, I mean firstly you've got the capacity aspect of it, and I know you see that many more people during the daytime than what your average club can hold... secondly, the girls without the money to be goin out won't be there, thirdly the girls who don't like that particular type of music aren't there, AND, the girl whose friends all like another kinda music won't be there.. the list goes on as to why a club is such a limited place to meet...

It's all about the daytime... the girls I've got on best with are those that I've met by doing somethin durin the day, the club girls bar a few are only good for one or two dates...

Thus, the message, use the clubs BUT use all those opportunities in the day cos you've got THAT much more of a selection...

 

[WestCoaster]

Senor, lighten up!

The name of this sight is soSUAVE not souptight.com. I posed the question out there. For the most part when you take a bunch of sleezy, American women, fill them with alcohol and surround them with alcohol-filled AFC chumps trying to prove something, then it's not a good atmosphere.

Honestly, you're one of the few people I know who go clubbing to relax and enjoy life. Most either go to pick up a woman (and an STD) or mix it up with some other guy.

Clubbing is a negative.

Senor, this is probably the first time you've had your opinions challenged.

I'm challenging the MEN on this site to change their ways, to take a more positive outlook on life and when it comes to women that starts with:

Dating foreigners
Finding options outside of clubbing

Gen X, Y, or Z is obsessed with clubbing and all I'm hearing from this board is pain and misery. We are a fat, obese country because U.S. women and men spend more time "clubbing" than working out. (Newsflash: Beer has a lot of fat and calories!)

And honestly, how many healthy marriages do you know of two people who met in a sleaze bar?

 

[Kineti[C]harm]

Clubbing all the way for me. I love clubbing, dancing, all the girls, getting Onenightstands isn't a problem. All my friends are there etc etc

 

[PRMoon]

I'm and undergraduate at the University of Nevada Las Vegas and I think clubs are a good place to meet girls and most of all have fun. Actually I think trying to meet girls in clubs is where most people go wrong. Usually when I go clubbing I'm going just to get my drink on and get my dance on and If I happen to meet and make out with a chick or two that's fine but my primary reason for being there is just to have a good time on the weekend. I know a ton of girls at the university and I meet even more on Las Vegas Blvd where I work and alot of them like to go to the club so I see them theere and what not. Since I know a few bouncers and what not, I tend to get in for free and I can usally get some free drinks too so why wouldn't I want to go to a club. It also helps to be a good dancer, I can't even count the number of times a girl has seen me dancing and either came over with a smile on her face or has pointed me out and had me come over to dance with her. Clubs are A+ fun if you go into them with the right mind set.

 

[Tkman]

Go clubbing to have fun and be free. Some people here go clubbing and get depressed ..... wtf ?

Walk the way you want to walk
Talk the way you want to talk
Make fun of anybody you want

 

[Señor Fingers]

Re: Senor, lighten up!

Originally posted by WestCoaster
The name of this sight is soSUAVE not souptight.com.[/i]

LOL! Exactly! Thas why I said "to each his own" I am not the one trying to impose his preferences on anyone.

Originally posted by WestCoaster
Clubbing is a negative.

In your experience and with the goals you have chosen, it is.

All I am saying is to keep an open mind instead of making generalized statements.

We cool though.

Do yer thang player!

 

[vectorz]

I think you're looking into it too much. Stop thinking so hard.

A club is a social gathering place. You get all sorts of people to come there, some are bad some are good. Just because you don't do well there doesn't mean it sucks. It just means you're not in tune w/ how things work there.

I hate to say it but most of you guys don't do well because you're socially inadequate. You don't know how to socialize with people and be naturally outgoing, and especially because a lot of you are physically unappealing makes it even worse. You got to have at least one or the other. Most of you are missing both. If you force yourself to be outgoing, it's very apparent. However, you do have to force yourself to pretend to be outgoing until you get good enough and really become a natural at it.

For some people, it'll never do. Don't knock it just cause you suck at it.

In all honesty, my close rate at clubs isn't all that good. However the few women that I HAVE met there have been amazing quality and made it all worthwhile. It's up to you. If you're a dork and you want quantity, I'd try elsewhere.

 

[WestCoaster]

The richest man in the history of the world ...

... (Bill Gates for those not paying attention) wasn't into "clubbing." Just a little factoid to you "cool guys" out there.

To me it's a waste of a lot of time. You guys should be working on getting dates with quality women, not a few dances or hook-ups with American sl-ts at clubs. Pretty soon you'll be 35 wearing polyester, hanging out in "lounges" and thinking you are cool.

Best to work on other attributes.

Club for fun, but meet women at other places, IMO.

Plus, it shoots your health to he-l. If you drink like a fish and eat sh-t food at these places you balloon up. Even if you work out the next day you're at ground zero because all you did was work off the sh-t you ate and drank the night before.

Don't pay attention to American culture -- you'll be fat, bald, and ugly in no time!

 

[One on One]

WestCoaster,

I forget your age, but I think you're 25 or so. Anyways, the American women you describe seems to be what I find on the 18+ nights at the club. The 21+ nights are a totally different story. It's much more mature! Though, I do agree that clubs are like fishing in polluted water. That's why when I go clubbing now it's just for fun and nothing else.

 

[WestCoaster]

OK, for fun, but no expectations

I'm still pi-sed at that beyotch who tossed a brew in one of our DJ's face because he didn't buy for all her friends -- then he was called a loser by her AFC friends. Yeah, like they're gonna pony up 10 drinks.

I'm older than 30 for the record. Anyway, some clubbing is good, some not so good.

The majority of problems posted here appear to be coming from clubbing. And that's just the tip of the iceberg in this country.

My opinion is if something is not working, you change your game plan.

No one should have beer tossed in their face -- that was awful. Only an American woman would try such a stunt ...

 

[JSH]

However, there are the benefits, American women are much more approachable, they almost expect to have guys come up to them, in the UK if you try a cold pick up, they are just so shocked that they slam the door immediately. It is more when the girls dress up, they want to be picked up but when they are doing their shopping they want to be left alone. I suppose they are cautious because they do live in a city like London where the newspapers are always harping on about crime (although it has in fact fallen).

But she musta been a proper b1at(h to expect him to buy drinks for all her mates, I have not yet (thankfully) come across that attitude in England yet.

 

[vectorz]

Originally posted by JSH
But she musta been a proper b1at(h to expect him to buy drinks for all her mates, I have not yet (thankfully) come across that attitude in England yet.

It sounds more like we don't have the full details of what happened to the story. I've been clubbing awhile, and I've yet to see that happen to anyone. I'm sure she would've told a different story, and he just wants something to blame for their unwise actions.

 

[Chemistry]

Cold approaches don't work in the UK?

They do... you're just not doing it right, you really gotta be that confident in it and know you're lookin THAT good... sure you will have some girls who shut you down, and I have been shutdown but that's all part of the process...

The thing with a cold approach is that you seriously don't know which way it's gonna go... all you know is that you like what you see, so you have 2 options, which are to go after it and there are 2 possible outcomes.. but the thing is you'll never get the positive outcome if you're too in fear of the possible negative

You need confidence but to be in touch with reality.. that girl mite think you're cool but she's got a BF so she isn't even thinkin of you in that light, and the same can be said if she's young and very focussed on whatever stage of education she's in... I mean some people really don't go out or want to get involved with anyone... or it could just be the fact that you don't have what SHE wants, but that's reality, you ain't gonna have everyone at your feet regardless of who you are...


Vectorz is on point in all this...

I mean, it wasn't even JUST a case of the girl randomly dumpin a drink on him, firstly had he not reapproachd with a "Hey" then it wouldn't have happened.. and there's always 2 side of a story...

How many random peeps do you know or see in the club gettin drinks dumped over them by girls?

 

[Señor Fingers]

Originally posted by Westcoaster
The majority of problems posted here appear to be coming from clubbing. And that's just the tip of the iceberg in this country.

Really? I think the bigger problem is guys not having enough confidence in themselves and succumbing to their own doubts and fears.

Vectors made a great point..

When you are socially inept like many of these guys, clubs are a DISASTER! But the problem is not with clubs, nationalities or any other such nonsense.

It is deeply rooted within the AFC who is totally clueless about how to initiate and maintain interesting conversation and embrace his sexuality.

Instead of avoiding clubs and American women, I think the guys here would benefit from improving their social skills, deciding what they want out of life (and what kind of woman would compliment this) and learning to accept their own horniness without apologies.

Why give these guys something more to fear? Most of them are already scared out of their minds as it is, and if they heed your advice, they just have one more thing to be paranoid about.

Clubs, Whòres, Americans, oh my!

Where is the fun and growth in such limited thinking?

The majority of the problems we see on this board are caused by the fact that most of these guys are trapped in a world of theories and generalizations based on their own limited experiences and the advice of other misguided souls.

In the past I have been guilty of this too, and am not attacking you at all Westcoaster. You strike me as a cool cat and I have seen you give some very wise advice before...

*sigh*

I guess I just wish there was more positive energy on this forum ya know? Seems like so many of yall focus on negative sh!t. "Dont go here!" "Dont game these type of women!" "Masculinity is under attack!" "DANGER! WILL ROBINSON!!"

Relax mah bruthas! Decide what you like to do for fun and find a fly cutie to do this with you. Plain and simple...

It all depends on what YOU want. LTR? ONS? Threesomes?

One mans heaven is another mans hell, so lets all keep an open mind and strive towards the goal at hand.... living the lives we choose to lead!