Mr. Non-Juan
Don Juan
- Joined
- Dec 21, 2005
- Messages
- 87
- Reaction score
- 3
The NON-JUAN Post: Teaching Men to Become Good With Women... by Showing How to LOSE Them!
Today's Topic:
CREATING AN ONLINE PROFILE, NON-JUAN STYLE (Part 1)
One thing I noticed in trying to bring other people to my Myspace site is, when it comes to dating... there are LOTS of guys who have this Non-Juan thing mastered!
How do I know this? Simple: their blogs and profiles give them away!!
Just by having certain items written in your blogs and typed onto your profile, you can have girls who might have been interested in finding out more about you change their minds with just a few key phrases!
Today's Post will focus on making a Non-Juan blog...
PART 1: BLOGS
When girls go online to look for men, they don't just look for pictures or what his "about me" section says.
Women like to get a feel for what kind of man they're looking at. Since she hasn't met you, the best way for her to get a feel for you is by reading your blog.
People write their daily life experiences on a blog, especially about interactions with the opposite sex. As a Non-Juan, all of your experiences should be about as positive as the temperature in Antarctica! You can advertise these experiences to other women simply by typing them into your blogs!
"But Mr. Non-Juan," you ask, "won't that just give other women sympathy for my plight? Won't these women feel so sorry for me that they'll want to date me to ease my pain?"
...HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA Ha ha, ah... *ahem* Oh, you were serious?!?
Remember: women want a guy that every girl wants. If you show her through your blog that you're a guy NO ONE wants, she'll be more than happy to pass you up as well!
Here is an example of what I'm talking about:
What you are about to read, is a portion of a blog somebody actually typed and put on their page (name not used). its a letter he typed to a girl he was trying to get with. It's long (because us Non-Juan's can never get a point across to a girl in less than 4 sentences), so I'll be stopping at various intervals to explain why portions of this blog help advertise his Non-Juan style!
*** "Well, hello there! I realize writing a letter is very 8th-gradesque, but I didnt want to bother you while you were studying for finals (like I always seem to do whenever we chit-chat). Since I don't know your name and you're going to be an optometrist, you have been officially dubbed heretofore as Dr. Starbucks and will be referred to as such throughout the remainder of this letter***
In just this first paragraph, this guy did the following:
+ Showed he doesn't pay attention well to signals. Did he really think she was studying EVERY TIME he contacted her? Hmm...
+ Showed how cowardly he is to talk to her in person (because yes, writing a letter IS 8th-gradeesque, and a Non-Juan trait, too!)
+ Showed that he can't even remember her name! Always act like you can't remember a girl's name - she'll probably forget you even exist now, too!
Let's continue...
*** After tonight, I probably won't be studying until after Halloween and with you going home for the week, upcoming holidays, and me not knowing if you will or will not show up here until your next finals week, I figured this was the next sensible step to take.. I would regret not giving this to you more than the embarrassment and/or shame that may result from this letter you only live once right? ***
Let's see what else he's done...
+ He gave her a WAY OUT!! YES!! By bringing up potential reasons as to why they may not get together (going home this week, holidays, etc.) he practically HANDED OUT to her excuses she can use if she doesn't want to see him!
+ He's ASKING FOR HER APPROVAL!! He's basically said "I'm embarrassed that I can't talk to you about this in person, so I hope by reading this I'll be good enough for you to hang out with." Ooh yeah, put the pressure on a girl like that, and she'll be SURE to hang out... at another place where she knows you're NOT going to be!
To continue...
***I work at a bank.. and no, I did not graduate on time from an accredited 4-year university w/2 degrees and a minor so I could be employed opening up checking accounts, pulling peoples credit reports, or checking on rates to open up mortgages for people . . . I did it so I could learn to look busy as I get paid to practice the art of becoming a master web-surfer and spend countless hours on friendster and myspace.com. So, if youre thinking that I can hook you up some-way, some-how with any of the aforementioned services, you are sadly mistaken ***
Let me point out the Non-Juan parts from this section:
+ He's trying real hard to impress her. Check the resume: 4 years at a university, graduated on time, 2 degrees PLUS a minor, now works at a bank - he's trying to appear as a stable, hard-working man. In her eyes, though, he'll be seen as predictable and BORING, a great combination to demonstrate when trying to drive the women away!
+ He's telling her everything he possibly can about himself. By taking ALL the mystery out of yourself, you'll be able to crush the most fun part for a woman about a relationship - finding out about her man!
+ He's using phrases and words that sound weird to seem funny. BUT, since they don't know each other well, he'll just come across as weird - and why would she want to respond to a weirdo??
Moving on...
*** Im sure youre wondering what the impetus could have been for this letter.. Well, the answer is that I don't understand how you can walk into Starbucks with jeans, a big old I-Phelta-Thi sweatshirt, with your hair up in a messy ponytail, glasses, and no makeup, but still be able to captivate and prevent me from turning away as if you were some great, undiscovered piece of art from Monet.. you're the natural that comes before beauty... I sit waiting in anticipation for the next time your childish smile comes to surface on your face again. Its as if... you still see God's green earth the same way you did as a cute 6-year-old running around on the playground...and I find that, more so than anything, irresistible***
Wow, this blog gets better and better!
+ The part where he describes how she looks when she walks into Starbucks is CLASSIC NON-JUAN MATERIAL!! Trust me - she won't be thinking "oh wow, this guy is SO sweet; he notices every little detail about me, including what I wear!"
Nope - instead, she'll be thinking "oh wow, this guy is OBSESSED with me! How is it that he knows what I wore 3 DAYS AGO - even I don't remember THAT!! He must be a stalker!!"
+ Notice the words he uses in describing her: "captivate," "you're the natural that comes before the beauty," "undiscovered piece of art" - these words are pure Non-Juan! They're non-masculine, AND sound wussy enough to where she'll think you don't have a manly bone in your body!
+ He's comparing her to a child, with child-like innocence and features. Quick, somebody call R. Kelly!! We've got a Non-Juan pedophile in the house!!
But wait! There's more...
***I'm really not looking for anything at the moment, but I do love making new friends, especially ones that make me smile without trying to and that provide incentive for me to study at Starbucks.. If anything naturally progresses from a friendship between the two of us, Ill deal with it then. But basically, Id love to just hang out and have fun!***
This is perhaps the most CRUCIAL part of this blog. Here's why: He's telling her a LIE! Go back and re-read the previous parts of the blog. After all this, he CLAIMS to be not looking for anything other than a "friend." But this is a good thing!! "Why?" you ask? Simple:
+ She'll never believe anything he says from now on! If he's going to lie about something like what he really wants to do with her (be her boyfriend, have relations, etc.), why should she believe anything else he has to say?
+ IF - and it's a long shot - she decides to be friends with him, she'll be able to "let's just be friends" him anytime because HE brought it up first!! If he ever asks "so, do you want to be my girlfriend?" all she'll have to say is "I thought you were just cool with being friends!"
+ He's not even "friends" with her yet, and he's already bringing up the possibility of being more than that in the future. Non-Juans are famous for putting the cart before the horse - no wonder it'll be so easy for you to trip over yourself by doing this!
We're almost at the end!
*** If you choose not to respond to this letter, thats cool; I wont even mention it if we ever speak again and the next time you see me, we can just smile and die of laughter as a result of my feeble attempt to woo you. Feel free to call/email whenever you want I promise, I wont think youre a stalker, but that doesnt mean that Im not!***
Oh, I'll bet you are a stalker, my Non-Juan apprentice! Here are some other key parts:
+ He left the task of contacting each other on HER. The best way for you to never hear from a girl again is to give her YOUR number and tell her "call me whenever you feel like it!" Girls rarely like to make the first call - even to guys they like - so with any luck you'll never hear from her again!!
+ He's making himself look pathetic by calling his attempt "feeble". Again, the fact that he's telling her how pathetic he is will help make her perception of him be exactly that. Good for you!
And the best part about this whole blog? He placed it online at his site for OTHER GIRLS TO SEE!!
Now, not only will he not be able to get with the girl he wrote about (and, according to his blog, he didn't), he'll also be able to persuade off a whole fleet of girls that may have dated him had he not advertised his Non-Juan tendencies on his blog!!
Next week, ONLINE PROFILE Part 2: Creating a Non-Juan Profile...
That's all for now!
-Mr. Non-Juan
Today's Topic:
CREATING AN ONLINE PROFILE, NON-JUAN STYLE (Part 1)
One thing I noticed in trying to bring other people to my Myspace site is, when it comes to dating... there are LOTS of guys who have this Non-Juan thing mastered!
How do I know this? Simple: their blogs and profiles give them away!!
Just by having certain items written in your blogs and typed onto your profile, you can have girls who might have been interested in finding out more about you change their minds with just a few key phrases!
Today's Post will focus on making a Non-Juan blog...
PART 1: BLOGS
When girls go online to look for men, they don't just look for pictures or what his "about me" section says.
Women like to get a feel for what kind of man they're looking at. Since she hasn't met you, the best way for her to get a feel for you is by reading your blog.
People write their daily life experiences on a blog, especially about interactions with the opposite sex. As a Non-Juan, all of your experiences should be about as positive as the temperature in Antarctica! You can advertise these experiences to other women simply by typing them into your blogs!
"But Mr. Non-Juan," you ask, "won't that just give other women sympathy for my plight? Won't these women feel so sorry for me that they'll want to date me to ease my pain?"
...HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA Ha ha, ah... *ahem* Oh, you were serious?!?
Remember: women want a guy that every girl wants. If you show her through your blog that you're a guy NO ONE wants, she'll be more than happy to pass you up as well!
Here is an example of what I'm talking about:
What you are about to read, is a portion of a blog somebody actually typed and put on their page (name not used). its a letter he typed to a girl he was trying to get with. It's long (because us Non-Juan's can never get a point across to a girl in less than 4 sentences), so I'll be stopping at various intervals to explain why portions of this blog help advertise his Non-Juan style!
*** "Well, hello there! I realize writing a letter is very 8th-gradesque, but I didnt want to bother you while you were studying for finals (like I always seem to do whenever we chit-chat). Since I don't know your name and you're going to be an optometrist, you have been officially dubbed heretofore as Dr. Starbucks and will be referred to as such throughout the remainder of this letter***
In just this first paragraph, this guy did the following:
+ Showed he doesn't pay attention well to signals. Did he really think she was studying EVERY TIME he contacted her? Hmm...
+ Showed how cowardly he is to talk to her in person (because yes, writing a letter IS 8th-gradeesque, and a Non-Juan trait, too!)
+ Showed that he can't even remember her name! Always act like you can't remember a girl's name - she'll probably forget you even exist now, too!
Let's continue...
*** After tonight, I probably won't be studying until after Halloween and with you going home for the week, upcoming holidays, and me not knowing if you will or will not show up here until your next finals week, I figured this was the next sensible step to take.. I would regret not giving this to you more than the embarrassment and/or shame that may result from this letter you only live once right? ***
Let's see what else he's done...
+ He gave her a WAY OUT!! YES!! By bringing up potential reasons as to why they may not get together (going home this week, holidays, etc.) he practically HANDED OUT to her excuses she can use if she doesn't want to see him!
+ He's ASKING FOR HER APPROVAL!! He's basically said "I'm embarrassed that I can't talk to you about this in person, so I hope by reading this I'll be good enough for you to hang out with." Ooh yeah, put the pressure on a girl like that, and she'll be SURE to hang out... at another place where she knows you're NOT going to be!
To continue...
***I work at a bank.. and no, I did not graduate on time from an accredited 4-year university w/2 degrees and a minor so I could be employed opening up checking accounts, pulling peoples credit reports, or checking on rates to open up mortgages for people . . . I did it so I could learn to look busy as I get paid to practice the art of becoming a master web-surfer and spend countless hours on friendster and myspace.com. So, if youre thinking that I can hook you up some-way, some-how with any of the aforementioned services, you are sadly mistaken ***
Let me point out the Non-Juan parts from this section:
+ He's trying real hard to impress her. Check the resume: 4 years at a university, graduated on time, 2 degrees PLUS a minor, now works at a bank - he's trying to appear as a stable, hard-working man. In her eyes, though, he'll be seen as predictable and BORING, a great combination to demonstrate when trying to drive the women away!
+ He's telling her everything he possibly can about himself. By taking ALL the mystery out of yourself, you'll be able to crush the most fun part for a woman about a relationship - finding out about her man!
+ He's using phrases and words that sound weird to seem funny. BUT, since they don't know each other well, he'll just come across as weird - and why would she want to respond to a weirdo??
Moving on...
*** Im sure youre wondering what the impetus could have been for this letter.. Well, the answer is that I don't understand how you can walk into Starbucks with jeans, a big old I-Phelta-Thi sweatshirt, with your hair up in a messy ponytail, glasses, and no makeup, but still be able to captivate and prevent me from turning away as if you were some great, undiscovered piece of art from Monet.. you're the natural that comes before beauty... I sit waiting in anticipation for the next time your childish smile comes to surface on your face again. Its as if... you still see God's green earth the same way you did as a cute 6-year-old running around on the playground...and I find that, more so than anything, irresistible***
Wow, this blog gets better and better!
+ The part where he describes how she looks when she walks into Starbucks is CLASSIC NON-JUAN MATERIAL!! Trust me - she won't be thinking "oh wow, this guy is SO sweet; he notices every little detail about me, including what I wear!"
Nope - instead, she'll be thinking "oh wow, this guy is OBSESSED with me! How is it that he knows what I wore 3 DAYS AGO - even I don't remember THAT!! He must be a stalker!!"
+ Notice the words he uses in describing her: "captivate," "you're the natural that comes before the beauty," "undiscovered piece of art" - these words are pure Non-Juan! They're non-masculine, AND sound wussy enough to where she'll think you don't have a manly bone in your body!
+ He's comparing her to a child, with child-like innocence and features. Quick, somebody call R. Kelly!! We've got a Non-Juan pedophile in the house!!
But wait! There's more...
***I'm really not looking for anything at the moment, but I do love making new friends, especially ones that make me smile without trying to and that provide incentive for me to study at Starbucks.. If anything naturally progresses from a friendship between the two of us, Ill deal with it then. But basically, Id love to just hang out and have fun!***
This is perhaps the most CRUCIAL part of this blog. Here's why: He's telling her a LIE! Go back and re-read the previous parts of the blog. After all this, he CLAIMS to be not looking for anything other than a "friend." But this is a good thing!! "Why?" you ask? Simple:
+ She'll never believe anything he says from now on! If he's going to lie about something like what he really wants to do with her (be her boyfriend, have relations, etc.), why should she believe anything else he has to say?
+ IF - and it's a long shot - she decides to be friends with him, she'll be able to "let's just be friends" him anytime because HE brought it up first!! If he ever asks "so, do you want to be my girlfriend?" all she'll have to say is "I thought you were just cool with being friends!"
+ He's not even "friends" with her yet, and he's already bringing up the possibility of being more than that in the future. Non-Juans are famous for putting the cart before the horse - no wonder it'll be so easy for you to trip over yourself by doing this!
We're almost at the end!
*** If you choose not to respond to this letter, thats cool; I wont even mention it if we ever speak again and the next time you see me, we can just smile and die of laughter as a result of my feeble attempt to woo you. Feel free to call/email whenever you want I promise, I wont think youre a stalker, but that doesnt mean that Im not!***
Oh, I'll bet you are a stalker, my Non-Juan apprentice! Here are some other key parts:
+ He left the task of contacting each other on HER. The best way for you to never hear from a girl again is to give her YOUR number and tell her "call me whenever you feel like it!" Girls rarely like to make the first call - even to guys they like - so with any luck you'll never hear from her again!!
+ He's making himself look pathetic by calling his attempt "feeble". Again, the fact that he's telling her how pathetic he is will help make her perception of him be exactly that. Good for you!
And the best part about this whole blog? He placed it online at his site for OTHER GIRLS TO SEE!!
Now, not only will he not be able to get with the girl he wrote about (and, according to his blog, he didn't), he'll also be able to persuade off a whole fleet of girls that may have dated him had he not advertised his Non-Juan tendencies on his blog!!
Next week, ONLINE PROFILE Part 2: Creating a Non-Juan Profile...
That's all for now!
-Mr. Non-Juan