The nice guy look

DJ_in_making

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I have a this problem, no matter what I do, girls automatically see me as a nice/shy guy. They just see me and automatically think they know my life story, I just don't know why. I have to do 2x as much talking as a regular guy, before I am seen as 'not quiet'. does anyone have any tips to take away the nice, quiet, shy image? or do I have to make a first impression as a mean A-hole?
 

libre

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Young man, don't fall for the ******* role.

You don't need to be an *******; you just need to build your confidence. Women are drawn to men with self confidence.

Build it by having various life experiences and building your life skills and your «world» knowledge. Don't worry, you will make mistakes like all men but you will live and learn from them. Being able to shrug off bad experiences and bounce back will build and augment your self confidence and identity.

Have a good life young man.
 

coolguy676767

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Originally posted by libre
Young man, don't fall for the ******* role.

You don't need to be an *******; you just need to build your confidence. Women are drawn to men with self confidence.

Build it by having various life experiences and building your life skills and your «world» knowledge. Don't worry, you will make mistakes like all men but you will live and learn from them. Being able to shrug off bad experiences and bounce back will build and augment your self confidence and identity.

Have a good life young man.
Excellant Post, Excellant Advice, even though I am only 17 I agree with this totally.
 

Jariel

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Both me and my friend used to get this a lot when we were carrying a bit of extra weight. There's nothing like being "cuddly" to immediately drop you in the friendzone.

I agree with Metalfortress about building muscle - being in good shape will instantly turn up the heat with women. But as Mctwist4 said, a more modern image may also work wonders. Get some clothes that show class, maturity and sex appeal. Moreover, ditch anything with vibrant colours as these are generally perceived as child colours.

If none of this applies to you, then it's most definitely all about your confidence and body language.
 

Peace and Quiet

If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.

Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.

This will quickly drive all women away from you.

And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.

Satori

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I don't see anything wrong with colors. Find something that works with your style and how you want to look, but at the same time is falls within the bounds of current fashions.

Of course, you could also work on being more outgoing and talkative.
 

suave4sure

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Simple solution

If you're getting the nice guy role and having to talk twice as much that tells me one of two things. A. You're acting almost too interested in what's going on i.e. you are paying way too much apt attention. or B. the girls not interested in you and you overcompensate. its 50/50.

What you need more than learning how to pick up girls(for the moment) is to learn how to read people and whether they are receptive or not to what you are saying..

You say you're speaking twice as much as everyone else(which is attributible to many reasons), A. you're speaking about stuff nobody else cares about, B. You're not a good conversationalist in terms of splitting the conversations 50/50 as opposed to dominating it or C.All of the above. Im guessing it's C.

There are many different books than can help you out with your problem , just go to a library our bookstore and go to the self help section and pick out the book you feel is most relevant.

The other "MAIN" tip i have for you is if you are talking to people or listening don't make it seem like your hearing the meaning of life or some incredible trick to stay young for life.

When people seem too interested in someones story it turns most people off because people don't want a lap dog as a boyfriend/girlfriend or friend. They want somebody thats gonna tell them if something they said is stupid or funny. They don' t want somebody to stare at them with puppy dog eyes and not say anything.

If you need further elaboration ask.
 

DJ_in_making

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tnx for the advice all. Libra's advice was especially helpful. Suave4sure, I'm not quite sure I understand. Are you telling me not to listen as well?
 

A-Unit

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Re:

Quite honestly, the look is only 1 piece of it. If you wear clothes, whatever you wear, it won't matter what you are, if you're "nice" underneath.


Women are initially into image. This is VERY true of young women. They're bombarded by Disney, and Save by the Bell, and Varsity Blues.


I had the same convo last night with a girl I'm seeing who only went for the Captain of Football teams when she was in HS. She didn't like any of them, but when she "thought" of them, she enjoyed the image. Of course, that's what is portrayed by the media, so it's how she saw herself. Being the girl with the cool, popular jock guy, adorred by all. Yet, all of the guys she mentioned turned out to be dinks.

-sold drugs
-one died of a drug overdose
-would honk to pick her, instead of going to the door and meet her parents
-forced her to try and do sexual things, when she's already sexual enough
-failed
-has no jobs


No...you can say...see being an azzhole gets pvssy! No it doesn't. These guys have the worst lives now, and to trade all the good to get your d!ck wet is weak shyt.


I have only 1 last statement regarding improvement...your BOTTOM line belief, and philosophy on life should be rock solid and in line with what you truly want.


I lost my closest grandmother in April, who helped me through college and was there to talk to and it made me realize more than ever.

1. I'm alone.
2. Nobody cares whether I fail or succeed.
3. Life is too short to be afraid of what it is you want.
4. Successful people do exactly what unsuccessful don't like to do or want to, therein lies the opportunity.


You have to realize the only things we have are through belief. Trump believes he is deserving of his wealth, and all life has to grant him, so he goes and gets it. He doesn't try to build his self-esteem. In return, he gives good value. He pays his people well, he makes little known apprentices famous and makes his partners loads of money. Yet it all stems from unwavering belief that he deserves these things. There's no ticket handed out in life that say "you get this, you get that." You get what you go for.


Conversationally speaking...


You must believe each person you meet is truly unique and can open your eyes to new life experiences.

That each person TRULY wants to express who they are, to speak as they desire. Don't look at a person for what they give you, just see them as they are w/out trying to change or influence them. Be an observer, like a scientist. They'll be more willing to give and open up if you're receptive and give unwaveringly to them.


Style and the like comes from expressing your inner desire as real MANIFESTATIONS of what you want. Yes, it sounds like mumbo jumbo, but hear me out.

Say you like, martial arts and boxing, yet you think you have to be beefy like a bodybuilder and skip your true desire. You're only harming yourself and the women you'd attract.

Say you like a more polished, conservative Banana Republic look with suit coats, yet feel girls want A&F guys, and you skip your desire, you set yourself up to attract women not in concert with who you are.

Say you don't care about flashy cars, and rather opt for more sensible vehicles, hawking yourself into debt, all the lesser in money and good energy. You end up attracting the money hungry bimbos you don't want.


ATTRACTING women is about ECCENTUATING your innerself upon the world. The charismatic people we see are people are in LOVE with LIFE. They have the ball of momentum moving their life forward. I believe it's only maturity that teaches us this, as many teens and college aged guys take off on paths not true to themselves and wonder why they're fawking up and not even meeting girls they like.


1. They're focusing on WHAT they don't want, rather than what they do want.
2. They're not being true to who they are.


Personally, I feel bars are horrible places to meet women, even if I have success, 10 minute interactions do not engender a connection that means I'm special enough to lay. And just wearing condomn might make it cleaner, but it doesn't make it safe, nor change how many d!cks she's had in her.

That's me. I meet girls in their natural environments of work, through friends, out and about. Wherever. Search yourself...it's far more productive to bring the emphasis back on you and decide what you want.



A-Unit
 

Peace and Quiet

If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.

Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.

This will quickly drive all women away from you.

And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.

ghostin

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You can try changing up your style a little. Add a little color to ur hair, make it a bit wilder.
 

libre

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Hello again young man

I've been thinking about your post. What I can add is, do you play sports or do you have an interesting hobby like guitar playing?

My son which is almost your age plays baseball and guitar with passion. Thought he is somewhat discreet (with me anyway), you should see the young women and the guys drawn to him!

Having life interests like sports or an instrument playing, builds your life skills and your confidence. It might even be chess playing or participating in the shool radio if that are your interests. It doesn't matter what the subject is, the importance is that you build on your general aptitudes by concentrating on an interest. By augmenting your general skills and knowledge, you will build your confidence.

By the way, my nick is Libre which means Free in french and not Libra.

Have a good life young man.
 

DJ_in_making

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merci du conseil. As for A-unit, it says not to be yourself on sosuave.com. that's confusing
 
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