The new benchmark

[seasonedplayer]

Just came out of LTR and the relationship started to deteriorate when her friends started to get hooked up with boyfriends and with some getting engaged. I found also that my girlfriend's boyfriends were massive AFCs. If there was a dinner on at their place, they would put on aprins and serve the food like a woman, they would buy their girlfriends prada bags, take them on nregular weekends away, and basically have no lives themselves

Unfortunately, I wasn't providing the same even though I was making a very good living and paying the rent. I work hard and used to return from work 8pm and later

So at the end of the day, mass numbers of AFCs are setting a ridiculous benchmark. Basically, the guy does everything; makes a living, organises hoilidays, arranges the housework etc. The status quo is set and unless we adhere to the benchmark, we will never have a successful relationship; period

 

[joekerr31]

all those guys will be divorced or cheating on their wives within 5 years.

 

[ZenGodMod]

Hahaha, you got surrounded!!

AFC-ism is like an infection. Avoid at all cost. Don't mock them. Don't change and don't let their silly little beliefs effect you or your chick.

They weren't benchmarks at all.

The only thing i could complain about is that you should emitted a higher value over them to your chick and the girls around her.

DJ is the benchmark. Like a wolf in sheep's clothing. You just didn't emitted, you out casted yourself.

I know so many AFC men who look at me like I'm scum of the earth, because their girlfriends and i are the ones sitting lazy having a ball and getting served.

I do get criticized (beatch tested) for my lack of AFC-ism, but i don't even try to justify myself. I just tell them, this is me. I won't change, be moved or be influenced. That alone makes their eyes glister and proves I'm worth something beyond control, cause i lead the rest follow.

 

[finiti]

alright brothers here's a question...wouldn't men who have cash and only spend it for themselves get out of this troublesome situation? I talked to this young guy who was driving the new BMW 3 coupe...and I realized if more men were in his circumstances (the made alpha male I guess you could call it) wouldn't women respect them cause they'd know if they didn't they'd get replaced in the blink of an eye?

I mean I can not see a women telling this guy to cook.
He'd be dating a woman who has the financial backing to take care of herself (aka she covers her own bills for her toys).
The woman would plan the weekend trips...not him.

Oh yes and finally. He'd show her his successful friends and how the women in their lives work for them. (Don't you love it when things can swing both ways?)

 

[logic1]

An LTR ended?? and why?

Something dont sound right here. I'm not saying the other guys are doing everything right, but? I dont think you are telling everything. Most LTR's are give and take. What were the other women contributing to the relationships? If nothing then yes the men are in trouble down the road??

Season, I want to ask you this. Would you want to be in a LTR with yourself?

It is 50/50. You come across as considering yourself weak if you do something for your girlfriend??

I do agree that some women see other women getting treated like royalty and expect the same.

But could she have seen what a real relationship is about???

My 2 cents

 

[guru1000]

Do you conform due to the the FEAR OF CRITCISM or do you live life on your TERMS?

This is why MATRIX thinking is so powerful. You ostracise yourself to society's rules and say I AM. This is where the LABEL "BAD BOY" came from.

You were never truly a BAD BOY. Instead you are a MAN who does not subject himself to what society pronounces as NORMAL and CHOOSE to live on your terms.

This my friend is what seperates the MEN from the boys.

Live LIFE with CONVICTION on your TERMS. Do not be manipulated into MATRIX thinking.

If you and your GUT agree on this one, you are headed in the right direction.

At the end of the day, the MAN always prevails while the AFC wallows in self pity. You shall see.

 

[logic1]

Do you conform due to the the FEAR OF CRITCISM or do you live life on your TERMS?

This is why MATRIX thinking is so powerful. You ostracise yourself to society's rules and say I AM. This is where the LABEL "BAD BOY" came from.

You were never truly a BAD BOY. Instead you are a MAN who does not subject himself to what society pronounces as NORMAL and CHOOSE to live on your terms.

This my friend is what seperates the MEN from the boys.

Live LIFE with CONVICTION on your TERMS. Do not be manipulated into MATRIX thinking.

If you and your GUT agree on this one, you are headed in the right direction.

At the end of the day, the MAN always prevails while the AFC wallows in self pity. You shall see.

100% correct Guru. But you also must be prepared to accept the outcome of your actions with no remorse or blaming.

I think the OP was doing what his gut is telling him. I.E. His terms and convictions. But was not prepared for the results. Hence his posting about the problem and projecting the blame onto others. He could have posted about what happened without blaming other people.

Should just move on and accept the outcome and know he is doing the right thing.

 

[seasonedplayer]

100% correct Guru. But you also must be prepared to accept the outcome of your actions with no remorse or blaming.

I think the OP was doing what his gut is telling him. I.E. His terms and convictions. But was not prepared for the results. Hence his posting about the problem and projecting the blame onto others. He could have posted about what happened without blaming other people.

Should just move on and accept the outcome and know he is doing the right thing.

Yeh, thanks for the advice. I accept I behave the right way. Unfortunately, in today's society the results can be poor