The Need to Dominate

[KiInCollege]

Also known as the excessive drive to win or the lust for power.

I had this trait. My girl hated it, and so did I after I realized this part of me.

I've seen a man's need to prove himself. To boast. To be stubborn. We will always be vulnerable to our tempers. We can never win every fight. We will never always be right, but this drive to always be the winner will not allow us to easily accept a lost "victory."

When we don't win an argument, we may resent the other person and try to tear them down in other ways.

I hated that part of me after I realized how badly I could hurt someone I love. I would remember things that I said and be overwhelmed with guilt. I had been driven by the need to dominate. Even though I have a positive attitude, I still wanted things my way.

After I realized this, I knew it had to stop. I've improved my behavior and will not let my need to dominate hurt my relationship with my girl. We've been happier.

The desire to acheive is healthy for a man. But, the excessive need to dominate can lead to emotional abuse.

I read one of Player Supreme's posts on how he treats women and wonder if he's content with his behavior, or feels somewhat guilty. I write this for those here that may have an issue with themselves - and to remind myself.

 

[Player_Supreme]

Originally posted by KiInCollege
Also known as the excessive drive to win or the lust for power.

I had this trait. My girl hated it, and so did I after I realized this part of me.

I've seen a man's need to prove himself. To boast. To be stubborn. We will always be vulnerable to our tempers. We can never win every fight. We will never always be right, but this drive to always be the winner will not allow us to easily accept a lost "victory."

When we don't win an argument, we may resent the other person and try to tear them down in other ways.

I hated that part of me after I realized how badly I could hurt someone I love. I would remember things that I said and be overwhelmed with guilt. I had been driven by the need to dominate. Even though I have a positive attitude, I still wanted things my way.

After I realized this, I knew it had to stop. I've improved my behavior and will not let my need to dominate hurt my relationship with my girl. We've been happier.

The desire to acheive is healthy for a man. But, the excessive need to dominate can lead to emotional abuse.

I read one of Player Supreme's posts on how he treats women and wonder if he's content with his behavior, or feels somewhat guilty. I write this for those here that may have an issue with themselves - and to remind myself.

First of all: When I first started reading this post I wanted to write one word to you:SYMP!!!!!!!!


But then I noticed at the bottom you addressed it to me.

Secondly: Let me tell you emphatically YESSSSSSS. I enjoy the balance of power being in my court. It sounds like you sold out. Your girl broke you kid. She did the change or break up thing on you. You’re a broken smashed nut man now. Totally symped out.

Women have a lot of power to hurt a man and obviously she pulled hers on you. She gave you the change or else thing and now your conditioned. But to post it like it’s a medal to be won is where you went wrong.

You now have the collar around your neck and your wearing it proudly. I hope it fits real good on you. I’m sorry I don’t bow down for women. I don’t become their boy and entertain them by rubbing their feet and whining about how much I love them, nor do I post that kind of thing blasted all over a how to get laid forum.

If your happy being a SYMP then so be it. But keep it to yourself.

You might study successful men from history. You will see the same character traits that you gave up just so you wouldn’t have to put up with the heartbreak of losing your “honey bumpkins.” Sad man.

You took the blue pill and went back to sleep!

Don't worry there are plenty of other symps to keep you company. And like I said if being like this makes you happy then so be it.

I choose to live my life this way because it make ME happy. When I desire to settle down with just one ho (yeah I said it) then I shall. But it will be on my terms, not hers.

There are quite a few women these days who are looking for symps to settle down with because they are tired of the bad boys.

For many of these playerettes their goal is to find a bad boy and make him change. They will give in to you at first. Then once they got you hooked they begin to change or flip the script.

Consider yourself flipped!

 

[Player_Supreme]

I almost forgot. The need to dominate is a masculine trait. Masculinity is one of the problems with todays macho women.

They will seek to demasculinate men so that they can feel comfortable around them.

But then they will become bored later on and seek a new challenge.

I do hope you don't end up posting within the next year about how there are now problems in your relationship. And how she is bored with you now.

Please spare this site that feminine ending!

I'm not flamming you. My scarcastic style is part of my personality.

I do wish you luck. And since your now in a committed relationship you should have no further use for this site....so have fun.

 

[jakethasnake]

P_S, relax. LOL


Ki's description pretty much describes you down to your shoelaces. Hell, even your rabid response reflects this!


While I agree with you that a man should not be a 'symp', there is something to be said for some semblance of balance in a relationship. With the vibe I get from you, your relationships seem to be 95/5 - in your favor. That isn't a relationship. You're just keeping girls on a leash and keeping them in line with emotional abuse. Your lifestyle and philosophy attracts a certain type of female, P_S - and extremely effectively, might I add. Your un-yielding philosophy of keepin your jackboot on the necks of these girls, and your constant ridiculing of "symps" is evidence that you're just stuck in a cycle. Honestly, for a 40 something year old man to be doing this is..... irregular. Abnormal. I would feel like a damned fool if I was pushing 50 and did that. But then again, it's your own life - I'm not about to tell you how to live it. That's just my opinion.


So in conclusion, Ki's post was a good one. It's important to keep things in perspective.

 

[Player_Supreme]

Originally posted by jakethasnake
P_S, relax. LOL


Ki's description pretty much describes you down to your shoelaces. Hell, even your rabid response reflects this!


While I agree with you that a man should not be a 'symp', there is something to be said for some semblance of balance in a relationship. With the vibe I get from you, your relationships seem to be 95/5 - in your favor. That isn't a relationship. You're just keeping girls on a leash and keeping them in line with emotional abuse. Your lifestyle and philosophy attracts a certain type of female, P_S - and extremely effectively, might I add. Your un-yielding philosophy of keepin your jackboot on the necks of these girls, and your constant ridiculing of "symps" is evidence that you're just stuck in a cycle. Honestly, for a 40 something year old man to be doing this is..... irregular. Abnormal. I would feel like a damned fool if I was pushing 50 and did that. But then again, it's your own life - I'm not about to tell you how to live it. That's just my opinion.


So in conclusion, Ki's post was a good one. It's important to keep things in perspective.

Let me get back at ya in a minute!

 

[jakethasnake]

no problem!

 

[Crank_It_Up]

Originally posted by KiInCollege
...I read one of Player Supreme's posts on how he treats women and wonder if he's content with his behavior, or feels somewhat guilty. I write this for those here that may have an issue with themselves - and to remind myself.

not sure why Player Supreme does what he does... could be he got hurt badly and this is his defense mechanism so it won't happen again. Or it could be he's viewed as a little bit of a nerd and an oreo by his compatriates and this helps make him feel more black. Or perhaps he simply can't make enough money to support himself and has to resort to playing games on the local uglies.

In any case, the art of attracting/seducing women and extorting money from them are two very different things. Congrats on your reformed lifestlye.

 

[00Kevin]

this is the very issue that i broke up with my last girl friend. it was simply a power struggle. I was naturally dominate in the relationship and for some reason she would always try to balance things. I told my girl off for this and ended the relationship. Rather than submiting to my will and puting faith in my leadership she had to listen to her feminist books or dumb friends. I couldn't figure out why my girl would always say, "you want a woman to dominate you, don't you" I thought it was just some sexual thing with her on top, but then i relaized that it was all bull****.

don't let a girl make you feel bad about being a man. A good woman knows that you are in control and she will respect you for it.

I feel bad for you because you have let a feminist kick your ass. She broke you down and made you less of a man. Dump that **** out of your life and fine a submissive girl one who has respect for you

 

[DJ_Dork]

Domination or Submission? Seems like each different couple has one that is dominate and submissive. Seems like each different couple has either man or woman being dominate or submissive.

You have to ask yourself. What're you comfortable with? Do you enjoy setting up dates, organizing events, or being outspoken? You should find someone more submissive than you. It doesn't mean you "control" her - no one likes that. But people do like leading. I do not feel comfortable being a follower and am not a team player... I prefer to lead. Does this MEAN I am an alpha? NO. A submissive person can be an alpha even though he/she is following. A dominate person needs a submissive person to follow. It's like a collaberation between the both.

However the job is more tougher for the dominate person. The dominate person should always be on top of everything, should be unquestionable, etc. Please note most important of all:

The submissive person because he/she is the follower will test your strength of domination. If you are seen as weak or being indecisive, watch the mind games and power struggles fly. If you were in a relationship were you were always directing, then all of a sudden you are in a power struggle. Consider the relationship over. A girl that likes you will let you lead.

 

[Player_Supreme]

Originally posted by jakethasnake
P_S, relax. LOL


Ki's description pretty much describes you down to your shoelaces. Hell, even your rabid response reflects this!

Ok, I'm back. I had to answer a serious question before I entertain buffonary. Now did I or did I not post this above:

I'm not flamming you. My scarcastic style is part of my personality.

Did I? Go look and check incase I copied someone else's words other than mine. At my age I'm sure that can happen right jackie.

SECONDLY:

Did we not agree not to speak to each other again. I thought I recalled getting your word of honor on this. Is this an example of your snake-fu?

How about I tighten up my jackboots and stomp on you for old times sake then since you obviously miss me so got dam much:

Originally posted by jakethasnake

While I agree with you that a man should not be a 'symp', there is something to be said for some semblance of balance in a relationship. With the vibe I get from you, your relationships seem to be 95/5 - in your favor. That isn't a relationship.

Duhhh!!! WOW are you not the bright one. I will ask you another question. Did I or Did I not post this above also:


I choose to live my life this way because it make ME happy. When I desire to settle down with just one ho (yeah I said it) then I shall. But it will be on my terms, not hers.

Now jackie what does this mean. You claim to be so intelligent. Does it not mean that I am not in a square relationship at this time? But when I do decide to settle down into a square relationship it will be on my terms. And that 95/5 thing where in the fawk did you get that ratio?

I've posted 75/25 before as my idea of a relationship. You must be pullin shyt outta ya narrow ass again. You outta stick to pullin rabbits outta ya ass to entertain some women....you might actually get laid one day!

OK LET ME SEE SOME MORE OF YOUR CLOWN ACT:

Originally posted by jakethaFake

You're just keeping girls on a leash and keeping them in line with emotional abuse.

By any means necessary! And you've seen me write that I am a gentleman until they set the stage for me not to be one. I am a real man. I don't follow women. I don't say "honey what do you want to do tonight" I say " I am going to the movies, wanna go" when I want to take them out. Other wise I will let them call me and suggest something...of course they are paying when they do...but that is just how I roll.

You can go on paying for endless dates and dinners and flowers and candies Jackie...and maybe one day you will be all up inside some pvssy again...like when you were born.

Originally posted by jakethaFake

Your lifestyle and philosophy attracts a certain type of female, P_S - and extremely effectively, might I add. Your un-yielding philosophy of keepin your jackboot on the necks of these girls, and your constant ridiculing of "symps" is evidence that you're just stuck in a cycle. Honestly, for a 40 something year old man to be doing this is..... irregular. Abnormal. I would feel like a damned fool if I was pushing 50 and did that. But then again, it's your own life - I'm not about to tell you how to live it. That's just my opinion.

YAWN!!!! What you shoulda done Jake was kept your opinion to ya self (don't bother with the ebonics come back).

Now why don't you post how a 40 year old single Player is suppose to be....since your so enlightened. What I consider abnormal is someone who comes up in here with no game posting their opinion and they are still probably a virgin.

You still haven't offered one shred of proof as to why anyone on this site should even listen to your KJ opinions.

Let me give you some advice since your still wet behind your ears.

1. Save your money.

2. Buy a house

3. Invest your money

4. Work hard for 25 -30 years.

5. Then maybe when you get to my age with visable signs of wealth you might get some Asian Internet bride to feel sorry for ya and marry you.

I will go on doing what I do now...

Originally posted by jakethaFake

So in conclusion, Ki's post was a good one. It's important to keep things in perspective.

NOW THIS IS FUNNY:

1. YOU HAVEN'T OFFERED ANYTHING TO CONCLUDE!!!

2. All you have are your obsessed hatred of the man who bought you into the light as being an internet fake jake. I think the word is Keyboard Jockey am I right!

3. Now go get your bowl of noodles and remember not to spill all over the keyboard next time cause your posting is commin out all wacked. (No offense to the asian brutha's on this site but jake the fake has broken his promise and his word to me)

buh bye!!

 

[jakethasnake]

Originally posted by 00Kevin
this is the very issue that i broke up with my last girl friend. it was simply a power struggle. I was naturally dominate in the relationship and for some reason she would always try to balance things. I told my girl off for this and ended the relationship. Rather than submiting to my will and puting faith in my leadership she had to listen to her feminist books or dumb friends. I couldn't figure out why my girl would always say, "you want a woman to dominate you, don't you" I thought it was just some sexual thing with her on top, but then i relaized that it was all bull****.

don't let a girl make you feel bad about being a man. A good woman knows that you are in control and she will respect you for it.

I feel bad for you because you have let a feminist kick your ass. She broke you down and made you less of a man. Dump that **** out of your life and fine a submissive girl one who has respect for you

That was the subjective analysis of power dynamics I've ever read.


However, I do agree that "50/50" relationships are usually the most tumultuous and unstable - it's just a bad idea. I would personally go for around 60/40 to 70/30, in my favor. Less dominant males may opt for the opposite? I dunno. But anything more than 75/25 in either direction seems unhealthy, IMO.

 

[jakethasnake]

Player Supreme, cut the crap. You've been reading almost ALL my posts. Our 'pact' to not speak was broken by you MONTHS ago. I know this for a fact because you responded to a couple of my posts, and did not bother responding to you because I knew I'd open up your floodgates, creating an avalanche of garbage. So please... dont' put that on me.


A lot of 17 year old worship you here, P_S - the ones with the actual ability to think for themselves question every....single.....assertion that you make. It's only intermittently useful, and mostly highly questionable.



PS: What makes you think any Asian 'bruthas' are listening to you? I keep close tabs with most of the Asian sosuave-ers, and most think you're a joke.

 

[Player_Supreme]

Originally posted by jakethasnake
That was the subjective analysis of power dynamics I've ever read.


However, I do agree that "50/50" relationships are usually the most tumultuous and unstable - it's just a bad idea. I would personally go for around 60/40 to 70/30, in my favor. Less dominant males may opt for the opposite? I dunno. But anything more than 75/25 in either direction seems unhealthy, IMO.

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAH....GASP...AAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHA

That is if you can get a relationship. And are making yourself look like a fool again Mr. Huang!

Now go shebang shebang on another thread.

 

[jakethasnake]

uh, anyways.

 

[Player_Supreme]

I do want to state that you fellows should live your life the way that makes you happy. If having a leash on ya necks and being led around by women makes you all warm and moist in the cracks of ya arses...then so be it.

I think I have stated numerous times about the qualities of the modern man these days. Men are becoming feminized because the need for a masculine male is gone.

We have civili-zation now. We are no longer hunter gatherers.

Guys like me are obsolete. And becoming Symps might make ya happy. I just do what works for me.

And as you can see I am successful at it.

 

[KiInCollege]

I did the player thing until I finished school (thanks to this site, of course). Dating several attractive women at the same time is an ego boost, but the relationships are shallow and the dates were costly on a “student income.”

Because I chose the LTR path, does that mean I make sacrifices? Yes. But am I better off overall? That depends on who you ask

Player Supreme, you're the extreme example of what I'm cautioning about. Where is your sense of compromise? Are you only about taking from others?

Perhaps an overbearing display of dominance is a sign of insecurity.

As men, we should have most of the power. We should not tolerate disrespect. But I'm not about destroying my girl’s ability to make choices. I don't feel the need to force my woman. Some men do have some control issues, as I once did, and this post is for them to evaluate their actions.

A girl with healthy self-esteem will never allow you to control her for long. If your goal is a successful LTR, you should eliminate controlling behavior. My LTR lives with me - when you interact with someone on a daily basis for a few years, you learn what works and what’s not good.

But then, our relationship occupations are also different. P_S appears to desire many different women (and enjoy bragging about his many conquests). He probably would not enjoy seeing the same girl everyday.

I’m content with a deeper relationship with my LTR who I wake up next to daily. But to be fair, in some ways I’m motivated toward the LTR path because she’s more attractive than 99.9% of the rest out there. If I didn’t secure her, I may have stayed on the player path, as P_S did. I do miss the thrill of the hunt and I still have my skills, but the sacrifice has been worth it.

P_S and I have two different styles. My goal is for others to learn that moderation is preferable to complete control.

 

[Tha Realnezz]

Putting women on a pedestal is sympathising.That whole "Women are the weaker sex" sh1t is lame & leave you alone and confused.

How many women do the people in this thread have anyways?

 

[Player_Supreme]

Originally posted by jakethasnake
Player Supreme, cut the crap. You've been reading almost ALL my posts. Our 'pact' to not speak was broken by you MONTHS ago. I know this for a fact because you responded to a couple of my posts, and did not bother responding to you because I knew I'd open up your floodgates, creating an avalanche of garbage. So please... dont' put that on me.


A lot of 17 year old worship you here, P_S - the ones with the actual ability to think for themselves question every....single.....assertion that you make. It's only intermittently useful, and mostly highly questionable.



PS: What makes you think any Asian 'bruthas' are listening to you? I keep close tabs with most of the Asian sosuave-ers, and most think you're a joke.

Sorry don't flatta ya self. I've read 2 of your posts over the last few months. I still have you on ignore. Sorry.

I knew you were going to make a comment about me so I checked to see what baffonery you were up to again. I had started to suspect that YOU were that fool femanazi...but even you were not that dumb.

And the time your talking about above I didn't respond to you. I said I agreed with something you had wrote directed at the poster. On this thread you spoke directly too me.


Recall I've only looked at your words twice in the last few months. And I'm sure you've had other things to say negative about me in the last few months as anyone else will state. This is the first time I've bothered to look and check up on you in a while.

And your still a key board jockey. The thing about you guys is that sometimes what you say sounds logical and makes sense. You guys are good with putting down a few words.

But anyone can see that you fellow KJ"s don't have any real world experience.

Now why don' t you put on some tap dance shoes and tap your way outta my face.

 

[Tha Realnezz]

Who comes on a site like sosuave and talks about "50/50" relationships..?

Let me ask this again:How many women do you people have?

Dominationepends on what you mean.I don't really keep them tied down.

 

[KiInCollege]

To clarify, I think men still need to make 90%+ of the responsibility decisions (where to go to eat, how to spend the money, etc.).

What I mean by over-dominance is forcing her to do something she does not want to do.

This thread is NOT meant to justify wussy behavior or promote nice-guy antics. You still need to be a man. The point is avoiding dominance reaching the point of abuse to the girl.