The model puzzle at yoga class (help wise sages)

Defiant

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She's a 10 without question. So is her car. She doesn't say much to anyone....


There's a beautiful woman who sits next to me at yoga class. She started to sit there after I gave her some advice on stretching.

I've been chatting her up for about a month. I've learned her name, her job (a model), and the fact that she has two dogs, and she likes to hike.

You must be thinking: Sounds great.

But here's the problem. My conversations sound more like interviews than dialogue. For example:

me: how are you doing?
her: really good.
me: how was work today.
her: it was really tiring actually.
me: tough day?
her: yeah.

etc.

The problem is, in that one month, she has asked me only a few questions. I've initiated the majority of conversations. We've never had a genuine interaction. I do ALL the work. At first I thought she was just shy so I was patient but eventually I began to doubt that possibility and started to think she wasn't into me.

Also most of our conversations have been in the 10 minutes before and after yoga class when we are both stretching.

Well. Somewhere in this month, I asked her to meet me somewhere to try acupuncture. It's what I do... Spur of the moment, I asked her to meet me at a bookstore where I was going to be later that night. She said she had plans.

I thought, great I just struck out, but before she left looked at me and told me, with a giggle, she was nervous about that 'sort of thing.' So I thought it wasn't completely awful.

But after a month of these terse 'go nowhere' interactions, I had enough. It was just too much work. She showed interest or concern about anything about me.

So I said f**k it.

One class I placed my mat to the otherside of the room.
Started talking to another cute girl in the class.
Didn't say hello or anything. Left early.

The next class, I show up and wait for the teacher to open the doors. She shows up a few minutes later (I typically show up early, she never does). As we wait She says hello. I say hello and I don't say another damn thing. She then asks me whose teaching. I tell her (mind you without any animosity, just with a pleasant ambivalance). She then asks me about a party that the yoga teacher had thrown (the previous week I asked her to come, this was before I decided to give up my pursuit). I told her it was great and she should have come.

The doors open and she puts her mat in the regular spot and I put it in my new spot away from her. I spend the 10-15 minutes stretching in silence as the room fills with people. Had a great class.

When class was over. I spent the time afterwards taking time to have a long stretch session. Mind you she still is in the room. She begins to chat with the girl next to her (which was odd because she never talks to anyone). I ignore them completely. Before she leaves she comes over (out of her way) and say 'bye 'my name.'

I didn't even know that she knew what my name was?


So basically here we are....
WTF?

1. Is she now interested/intrigued by my new disregard?
2. Is she just being nice to placate an awkward situation?
3. Am I just reading into absolutely nothing?
4. what's my next move?

I'm an attractive guy. I've had girlfriends before and don't have that hard of a time getting dates with cute girls. The problem is that I don't really work hard in those situations or get nervous. It's these high 8's to 10s that put me in unfamiliar territory

If some wise mind can help illuminate and advise my next step, I'd be gratefull

defiant
 

Chrispy

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>>1. Is she now interested/intrigued by my new disregard?

Hard to read into it, but it sounds like she is a more intrigued than when you were more available (and was initiating conversation and doing something after yoga).

>>2. Is she just being nice to placate an awkward situation?

She could be, but your talking to other girls (great move) could have initiated it too. You may have made her more open by initiating first, and now that she sees she lost her chance, she might be initiating back.

>>3. Am I just reading into absolutely nothing?
Yes, don't we all?

>>4. what's my next move?
Keep talking to those other girls. If she's still friendly to you, casually try to make conversation - maybe even say she appears more relaxed and that it must be yoga. Just stay away from talking about the weather or work as being the reasons.
 

Bonhomme

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Here's another frame in which to view this: perhaps she's just not that good at small talk. I know I'm usually not, and often am at a loss for words even if a gal is clearly into me and I'm into her.

It's easy to not see the forest for the trees by being too close to a situation, so I see where you're coming from.

As I see it, it's pretty easy. You've already made one suggestion to get together, and she declined, but has not "rejected you." That much is obvious by the fact that she went a bit out of her way to say goodbye. If what you wrote is accurate, it's clear to me the way she declined your offer "left the door open," so to speak.

So, my take is that you should just go about doing what you're doing, and enjoy what you're doing, and if you have something you want to check out or some idea for a get-together, just go ahead and suggest it. If she declines again without leaving the door open, then forget about it, and leave the ball in her court.
 

Defiant

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thanks for the replies....
Let you know what happens. I created the situation. She is a model and that was unconciously or consciously intimidating. I put her on a pedestal.

Just going to be cool and do my own thing.
 
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