The Medium IS The Message

upcoming_DJ

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Hey DJs,

After not visiting sosuave in some time, I was scrolling through recent threads here and realized that a lot of us (including myself in the past) ask questions on girls who are giving off "mixed signals", "hold and cold", and "flaky behavior".

I searched the forum and realized that Rollo Tomassi's article on THE MEDIUM IS THE MESSAGE has only been posted handful of times, and not recently.

It takes some getting use to and reconditioning, but after you'd read the article a couple of times and begin seeing the situation for what it is, you'll find a lot of value in it.

Here's a quote from the article:
When a woman goes from hot to cold and back again, THIS IS the message — she’s got buyers remorse, you’re not her first priority, she’s deliberating between you and what she perceives is a better Hypergamous prospect, you were better looking when she was drunk, etc. — the message isn’t the ‘what ifs’, the message IS her own hesitation and how her behavior manifests it. 10 dates before sex? This IS the message. Canceling dates? Flaking? strong interest to weak interest? This IS the message.

Women with high interest level (IL) wont confuse you. When a woman wants to **** you she’ll find a way to **** you. If she’s fluctuating between being into you and then not, put her away for a while and spin other plates. If she sorts it out for herself and pursues you, then you are still playing in your frame and you maintain the value of your attention to her. It’s when you patiently while away your time wondering what the magic formula is that’ll bring her around, that’s when you lean over into her frame. You need her more than she needs you and she will dictate the terms of her attentions.
Link to the article: https://therationalmale.com/2011/09/06/the-medium-is-the-message/

Hope others find it helpful. It sure helped me.
 

SW15

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It's a good article. It has stood the test of time since it was published in 2011.

I think it is important for us men not to use the terms "mixed signals" or "mixed messages" when describing women's behaviors. I have been guilty of using that term at various times and I'm going to make the effort to not use that term again.

Rollo is correct that women with high interest levels (IL) will not be that difficult to understand. It is the women with lower levels of interest who behave in a manner that is less clear to follow.

Unclear behavior is best not tolerated.
 

AmsterdamAssassin

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Unclear behavior is best not tolerated.
Unclear behaviour is best left to those who can read the road without needing the signs.
 

BaronOfHair

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Hey DJs,

After not visiting sosuave in some time, I was scrolling through recent threads here and realized that a lot of us (including myself in the past) ask questions on girls who are giving off "mixed signals", "hold and cold", and "flaky behavior".

I searched the forum and realized that Rollo Tomassi's article on THE MEDIUM IS THE MESSAGE has only been posted handful of times, and not recently.

It takes some getting use to and reconditioning, but after you'd read the article a couple of times and begin seeing the situation for what it is, you'll find a lot of value in it.

Here's a quote from the article:


Link to the article: https://therationalmale.com/2011/09/06/the-medium-is-the-message/

Hope others find it helpful. It sure helped me.
Expecting women to operate in a linear, consistent fashion makes less sense than anticipating that Boko Haram will lay off fire bombing villages throughout Nigeria any time soon, in favor of peaceful protest
 

The Duke

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If you want to navigate "unclear behavior", it can result in sex but its going to take some solid push-pull/mental games to turn the tables on her. Like AA said, its going to take someone who can read the road without needing the signs. For me I always ended up exhausated and got tired of having to be one step ahead all of the time.

Its best to use that energy to find someone else.
 

AmsterdamAssassin

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Like AA said, its going to take someone who can read the road without needing the signs. For me I always ended up exhausated and got tired of having to be one step ahead all of the time.
I enjoy the psychological sparring, so I don't get tired, but... it's not for everyone.

Its best to use that energy to find someone else.
I totally agree.

If a relationship doesn't seem to give you at least twice what you put into it, it's better to move on and find someone else.
 

Clockwerk50

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What does it mean when someone tells someone “hello, darling of mine love of another”?
 

Ricky

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What does it mean when someone tells someone “hello, darling of mine love of another”?
Sounds like something from a movie did you google it
 

taiyuu_otoko

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This idea only seems insightful from a scarcity mindset.

If you are so desperate you hang on for dear life to any girl who's giving you "mixed messages" it's hard to see what's happening.

You'll waste all kinds of time theorizing and worrying about "female nature."

But you're not so into her because you've got better/more options, you'll simply discount any "mixed message" girl without worrying about why.
 

Chow Mein

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If you want to navigate "unclear behavior", it can result in sex but its going to take some solid push-pull/mental games to turn the tables on her. Like AA said, its going to take someone who can read the road without needing the signs. For me I always ended up exhausated and got tired of having to be one step ahead all of the time.

Its best to use that energy to find someone else.
Seems like you’re good with the plates you got! Same here, along with AA, you no longer have to chase. Those that want to be on our journey better prove themselves. Reverse the roles.

Ha! So, how did we get to this point?
Hard work and dedication to the game. Respect.
 

The Duke

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Seems like you’re good with the plates you got! Same here, along with AA, you no longer have to chase. Those that want to be on our journey better prove themselves. Reverse the roles.

Ha! So, how did we get to this point?
Hard work and dedication to the game. Respect.
I was clueless when I first started. After I got some things figured out, I was only good enough to get the HB7-8's that brought a lot of drama. I finally pushed myself to improve even more and now I can get HB8's that are solid and it's easier than ever.

Just like you said, hard work and dedication. You have to hold yourself accountable, cut the excuses, and not blame outside forces.
 

upcoming_DJ

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What does it mean when someone tells someone “hello, darling of mine love of another”?
you can deduce what you may from it - from me I said it because I gave her context and the context was around THERE ARE OTHER OPTIONS, she brought it up because I have a "player" profile in my small hometown. So I used it as a tease.

Know when to do things like that and when not to.
 
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