The Loner Image

[leeman67]

Just curious. In general. Do women find a loner attractive or is this something I need to shed off of me? I have very good friends, but I dont feel a need to hang around them very often. I generally like time by myself as preference. I still mix it up everyone once in awhile. but I dont care for bars or night clubs. So I am at a loss to really figure out where to meet someone.

Is a loner Image good or bad?

 

[englishman]

I dunno, Im waiting to see what others say, Im same, got good buds but like my own time?

 

[MetalFortress]

Just curious. In general. Do women find a loner attractive or is this something I need to shed off of me? I have very good friends, but I dont feel a need to hang around them very often. I generally like time by myself as preference. I still mix it up everyone once in awhile. but I dont care for bars or night clubs. So I am at a loss to really figure out where to meet someone.

Is a loner Image good or bad?

It's not good if you're not really meeting anybody. I'm trying to come up with a situation in which it is good, but I can't really find anything, besides if the girl herself is a loner.

 

[hithard]

No its not a good image, and worse if your social network is small.

 

[Street_Fighter]

Depends on what you are into and if you are comfortable being alone.Some people hate being alone and it's centered around insecurities and BS,while others are alone and enjoy their solitude and doing things on their own.I personaly like spending time alone and doing my own thing but I can go out on a night on the town either by myself or a small group of people.It's not good or bad but how YOU view it.Generaly speaking though,sitting at home twidling your thumbs and whinning about how lonely you are and how the world sucks? yeah..that usualy indicates a bad thing.But if you generaly enjoy your own company and get lost in your hobbies or just relaxing at the lake with your headphones on a sunny day,sipping on some corona and maybe a young ladie...that's cool.You just have to know your reasons you are alone.It shouldn't be soley determined on a girls opinion on it anyways..if she can't handle you being a loner then it's her problem..not yours.She can either deal with it or not,but it's your personal life after all..weither you are a loner or not it should'nt really concern her too terribly.

:woo:

 

[jonwon]

Just curious. In general. Do women find a loner attractive or is this something I need to shed off of me? I have very good friends, but I dont feel a need to hang around them very often. I generally like time by myself as preference. I still mix it up everyone once in awhile. but I dont care for bars or night clubs. So I am at a loss to really figure out where to meet someone.

Is a loner Image good or bad?

I think you have the term confused.

There is loner and there is 'looser'.

A loner is fine, someone who is not afraid to do his own thing, walk his own path and take on new challenges. But said loner welcomes others into his life to help him peruse his interests, which in all fairness is perfectly healthy.

Extremes you will see are:
• Going on holiday to new exotic places alone, to experience a new culture.
• Taking on self development, going to the gym alone, learning a new language e.t.c
• Not afraid to stand up for his beliefs even when the world around him seem to baaa like sheep.
• Not afraid to challenge current norms and trends, is not afraid to question authority.
• Is not afraid of being PC or none PC.
• He kind of does his own thing with confidence and conviction.


A loser is someone who makes not effort to grow, uses negative frames to direct his path in life. Louts about, making excuses for why he ‘cant’ achieve something, does not encourage self growth, tends to blame everyone but himself for all the rubbish in his life.

Extremes you will see:
• Heavy Computer game player, unhealthy obsession, takes time off work (does not work), does not take time out to peruse other things.
• Does not like to experience new things, sticks to the norm of which usually means sat around doing nothing all day every day, making excuses to why he cant do this or do that (I cant got to the gym as I xx xxx e.t.c, I cant learn or develop because xx xxxxx).
• Avoids meeting new people as he sees them as inferior (they normally have some superiority complex)
• Has low self esteem, is afraid to embrace new things as it will break there comfort zone!
• Can’t accept success or the ability that life can change for them, stuck in loser mode mentality!



We all have a bit of loser and Loner in us!
Some more then others!

The above are simply a few examples!

Loners can be extreme loners with pursuits that keep them interested, losers can be extreme losers with the looser mentality which tells them they ‘cant’ every step of the way.

There is nothing wrong with setting your own path in the world, there is something wrong though when that path is clearly looser influenced and not loner influenced.

Are women attracted to loners?
Sure why not, I can think a true loner would be very interesting.

Are they attracted to losers?
No I would think not!

 

[Street_Fighter]

^^
great answer

 

[Jariel]

I guess a lot of loners like to think of themselves as the mysterious and silent stranger, like something from a novel or movie. But in reality, no one really sees them that way. If a guy is a loner and acts like a loner, he's more likely to be labelled as "weird", "a loser" or "unsociable". Sad, but often true.

When it comes down to it, there are reasons why people are loners. They lack social skills, they're timid, they lack a sense of adventure, and have a lot of unnattractive personality traits.

I used to be the loner figure. I was very cynical about people, I had my own interests and I preferred my own thoughts to the world around me. But I soon realised that it was all down to my attitude. Once I started talking to people in a polite, friendly and enthusiastic way, they started responding to me in the same way. Once I started going out places with people, sharing experiences and laughs, these places started to feel great.

Basically, if you give off a "loner" vibe, then people will just leave you alone.

 

[Street_Fighter]

I guess a lot of loners like to think of themselves as the mysterious and silent stranger, like something from a novel or movie. But in reality, no one really sees them that way. If a guy is a loner and acts like a loner, he's more likely to be labelled as "weird", "a loser" or "unsociable". Sad, but often true.

When it comes down to it, there are reasons why people are loners. They lack social skills, they're timid, they lack a sense of adventure, and have a lot of unnattractive personality traits.

I used to be the loner figure. I was very cynical about people, I had my own interests and I preferred my own thoughts to the world around me. But I soon realised that it was all down to my attitude. Once I started talking to people in a polite, friendly and enthusiastic way, they started responding to me in the same way. Once I started going out places with people, sharing experiences and laughs, these places started to feel great.

Basically, if you give off a "loner" vibe, then people will just leave you alone.

I think the only reason you view it that way is because that's how YOU yourself relate to that loner image/persona...

it's like saying all socialites are all shallow and egotistical people,which is clearly false...




they're actualy emotional vampires.

 

[jtrain 289]

No its not a good image, and worse if your social network is small.

Who said its not a good image do what you want dont let tell people tell you how to act

 

[jackofasses]

I think you have the term confused.

There is loner and there is 'looser'.

A loner is fine, someone who is not afraid to do his own thing, walk his own path and take on new challenges. But said loner welcomes others into his life to help him peruse his interests, which in all fairness is perfectly healthy.

Extremes you will see are:
• Going on holiday to new exotic places alone, to experience a new culture.
• Taking on self development, going to the gym alone, learning a new language e.t.c
• Not afraid to stand up for his beliefs even when the world around him seem to baaa like sheep.
• Not afraid to challenge current norms and trends, is not afraid to question authority.
• Is not afraid of being PC or none PC.
• He kind of does his own thing with confidence and conviction.


A loser is someone who makes not effort to grow, uses negative frames to direct his path in life. Louts about, making excuses for why he ‘cant’ achieve something, does not encourage self growth, tends to blame everyone but himself for all the rubbish in his life.

Extremes you will see:
• Heavy Computer game player, unhealthy obsession, takes time off work (does not work), does not take time out to peruse other things.
• Does not like to experience new things, sticks to the norm of which usually means sat around doing nothing all day every day, making excuses to why he cant do this or do that (I cant got to the gym as I xx xxx e.t.c, I cant learn or develop because xx xxxxx).
• Avoids meeting new people as he sees them as inferior (they normally have some superiority complex)
• Has low self esteem, is afraid to embrace new things as it will break there comfort zone!
• Can’t accept success or the ability that life can change for them, stuck in loser mode mentality!



We all have a bit of loser and Loner in us!
Some more then others!

The above are simply a few examples!

Loners can be extreme loners with pursuits that keep them interested, losers can be extreme losers with the looser mentality which tells them they ‘cant’ every step of the way.

There is nothing wrong with setting your own path in the world, there is something wrong though when that path is clearly looser influenced and not loner influenced.

Are women attracted to loners?
Sure why not, I can think a true loner would be very interesting.

Are they attracted to losers?
No I would think not!

Jesus... I hate to admit this.. but i am definitely in that loser description. I really don't feel good now. My god. Talk about really getting a kick in the emotional nutsack.

 

[Alphamale1821]

it depends what kind of chick you are going for. If your more into the goth, freak, poser or emo scene then being a loner wouldn't be all that bad. However if your into preppy chicks or chicks with a sense of style good luck with hooking up with them being a loner. Being a Loner if pulled off right makes you more of the serious type and chicks like that too. But if your serious to the point where you anti social then i would cut that **** out. Talking to people and more so talking about yourself to people is so much more enjoyable then being alone and away from humans.

 

[Obsidian]

jonwon, you need to repost that post in Tips.

 

[Street_Fighter]

I don't think it matters if ones a loner or socialite..it all depends on how they treat people and communicate.

 

[Canadien]

Thanks man

I think you have the term confused.

There is loner and there is 'looser'.

A loner is fine, someone who is not afraid to do his own thing, walk his own path and take on new challenges. But said loner welcomes others into his life to help him peruse his interests, which in all fairness is perfectly healthy.

Extremes you will see are:
• Going on holiday to new exotic places alone, to experience a new culture.
• Taking on self development, going to the gym alone, learning a new language e.t.c
• Not afraid to stand up for his beliefs even when the world around him seem to baaa like sheep.
• Not afraid to challenge current norms and trends, is not afraid to question authority.
• Is not afraid of being PC or none PC.
• He kind of does his own thing with confidence and conviction.


A loser is someone who makes not effort to grow, uses negative frames to direct his path in life. Louts about, making excuses for why he ‘cant’ achieve something, does not encourage self growth, tends to blame everyone but himself for all the rubbish in his life.

Extremes you will see:
• Heavy Computer game player, unhealthy obsession, takes time off work (does not work), does not take time out to peruse other things.
• Does not like to experience new things, sticks to the norm of which usually means sat around doing nothing all day every day, making excuses to why he cant do this or do that (I cant got to the gym as I xx xxx e.t.c, I cant learn or develop because xx xxxxx).
• Avoids meeting new people as he sees them as inferior (they normally have some superiority complex)
• Has low self esteem, is afraid to embrace new things as it will break there comfort zone!
• Can’t accept success or the ability that life can change for them, stuck in loser mode mentality!



We all have a bit of loser and Loner in us!
Some more then others!

The above are simply a few examples!

Loners can be extreme loners with pursuits that keep them interested, losers can be extreme losers with the looser mentality which tells them they ‘cant’ every step of the way.

There is nothing wrong with setting your own path in the world, there is something wrong though when that path is clearly looser influenced and not loner influenced.

Are women attracted to loners?
Sure why not, I can think a true loner would be very interesting.

Are they attracted to losers?
No I would think not!

I can relate to your post very much, I've been in constant loner state for some time now, but what u said is so true. I'm trying to get out of this right now though by interacting with lots of people, but I still can't find the real friends in all this..

 

[leeman67]

Street Fighter, You pretty well just described me. I dont ever feel lonely or that th world sucks. I actually like time to myself to think and do hobbies. but I am now nearing 40 years old , I m starting I guess to feel a midlife crisis. I just dont want to me some 50 year old hitting on women.. LOL

 

[Mjazz]

I just dont feel the need to hang out with my friends all day, I can go weeks without hanging out with them. I work almost all the time, so im constantly talking and meeting new people there, I have two jobs, workout and read. I guess there is busy, and then there is loner. Loner is a bad image, unless your actually being productive.

 

[Production6257]

I'm not necessarily a loner, but I am more of the laid-back type that doesn't need a million friends to be happy nor do I feel pressure to constantly socialize. I have 3 close friends that I hang with on weekends.

From my experience, some girls tend to have crushes on me and whatnot (Mysterious, I guess), but it is very hard to approach as they tend to have more people around them.

 

[leeman67]

Here is what I think is happening. I have been comfortable so long doing things independantly and on my own that I got use to it. I think to it is true that women find me not approachable. Once I get to know someone at all, I am very friendly and out going. I have spent the last few years on my own in the gym getting into shape. (I am still a work in progress) . I guess Im looking for guideance to open a new world for me. I am now getting alot of attenton from women that use to never look my way. Now its. What do I do? LOL

 

[leeman67]

The Loner

I'm not necessarily a loner, but I am more of the laid-back type that doesn't need a million friends to be happy nor do I feel pressure to constantly socialize. I have 3 close friends that I hang with on weekends.

From my experience, some girls tend to have crushes on me and whatnot (Mysterious, I guess), but it is very hard to approach as they tend to have more people around them.

Im the same way hammahamma. I dont feel that women are not attracted to me. I actually consider myself fairly good looking, but there is defiintely something Im doing that is causing me to shoot myself in the foot. I recently asked a woman at work out that replied She has a boyfriend, but things were not going well. Said if things didnt get better, she would defiintely be intersted in going out . She in an earlier confersation said she could tell I was a loner. Said her last boyfrend also was. This Image over the years hasnt done much for me socialy. I think its about time I try something new.. LOl