The keys to improving your game

[Zebedee]

This has probably already been covered but here is a list of what I think every guy needs to do to improve his game.

Confidence
Get yourself looking as good as possible go to the gym, watch what you eat, dress well, get a hairstyle that compliments your looks and this cant help but improve your confidence levels and become more attractive to the opposite sex. Another way of developing confidence is to be more confident and project yourself as an alpha male in all situations whether it be at work, talking to friends or something else. Eventually this will become the norm for you and it will naturally become part of your personality without giving it much thought.

Approaching
There is no magic line or perfect thing to say, the most important thing is to go over there and start a convo if you hesitate you will talk yourself out of it. Don't take the conversation too seriously keep it light, fun and flirty, you have to project yourself as a confident fun person as this is key to attracting women. A way of helping with this is to practice developing your personality in other social situations as practice. Remember that not approaching will leave you feeling worse than approaching and getting a knockback.

Texting vs. Phoning
When making a date I find texting the best way to go, it takes the pressure off you to be charming and it gives you longer to think of a response. Talking on the phone takes away face to face advantages like eye contact and kino. Dont text too often and dont panic if you send a text and dont get a reply straight away, dont send another text until she responds.

On a date
Keep the conversation fun and light at all times whilst including flirting so you dont fall into the friend zone. Also go somewhere different on each date, variety is the spice of life.

Never get complacent
I have been guilty of this many times. I have been with girls who tell me they cant live without me or that they are in love with me and as a result I have let my guard down and became too nice and too caring, which lead to very bad results. Im not saying dont be nice, there is nothing wrong with treating a girl well and showing her a good time but if you are too nice then you are giving her all the power. If a girl likes you a lot she will want to work hard to please you but if you work too hard to please her she will stop making the effort and eventually lose interest. Remember even if you have been seeing eachother for a few months you still have to be on your A game at all times.

 

[Zebedee]

Desperation is the biggest turn off imagineable
It seems to me that no matter how much a girl finds you attractive and no matter how funny she thinks you are the second you act desperate you will be fighting a losing battle. Its a delicate balance as sometimes I have been guilty of coming across as desperate and even coming across as not interested enough as well. Dont be desperate doesnt mean dont text or wait for her to ask you out it means give her space but let her know you are still there.

Ignore your instincts
With a lot of guys if a girl stops acting interested or doesnt reply to a text instincts tell them to call her or text her to find out what is going on. This is wrong and will let her know you are easy and she has you wrapped around her finger. I was very guilty of this in my last relationship, and I am trying to learn from my mistakes. Instincts also tell a guy that if he likes someone he should let her know and put himself on the line. This again makes you come across as needy, you should always wait for the girl to let her feelings known first and even when this happens proceed with caution and don't let it change you too much.

 

[Tha Realnezz]

Never deal with just one woman,no matter WHAT.Always go after multiple targets at once..

To me this is the true key to success along with keeping your mystery and not falling into the phonetag crap.

 

[youngswagger09]

Zebedee I like this thanks for the help man

 

[Zebedee]

No problem. Talking from experience I know that this advice is a lot harder than it sounds and can take a while to achieve, its all about changing the way you think about certain situations while at the same time staying true to yourself. During my high school days I was about as socially awkward as they come, I was fat, had poor self awareness and never got dates. I am so different now to what I was like back then although I am still striving to improve.

 

[Asasione]

Texting vs. Phoning sounds good in theory but, its flawed IMO. Text instead of call, I know texting is low compliance and preferred by younger girls in general. If the girl has high interest level a phone call some sensual witty banter is the best alternative. I prefer phoning cause its faster and I don't like waiting on people, helps with your verbal skills, voice tone and pitch. Forces you to think fast and use your voice to create an experience through your words and laughter through your enthusiasm, project sexuality through tone and language. The benefits are endless. Its good practice for speaking skills, texts should be used as a last resort if she doesn't pick up or your unable to speak for some reason.

 

[Zebedee]

thats all true, the advice is more for people who can get tongue tied tied while on the phone plus sometimes if you talk too long on the phone you might run out of things to talk about once you hook up.

 

[youbaby11]

thats all true, the advice is more for people who can get tongue tied tied while on the phone plus sometimes if you talk too long on the phone you might run out of things to talk about once you hook up.

this thread has some great reminders!

 

[Zebedee]

I have a couple more to add

Sex
When it comes to sex you must be unpredictable, if everytime you have sex you follow the same routine things will quickly become boring. Be adventurous and try different positions and techniques, look it up on google if you have to and learn. Im not ashamed to admit I have looked up sex tips on google and as a result it is the one area when it comes to dating that I feel most confident in as I now always guarantee a great performance. Knowing you can give a girl a massive orgasm without trying too hard is a real confidence booster. Giving a girl good head is a guaranteed orgasm for her and once again I found all of my techniques through googling them. This will get you into her good books big time.

Dont Share your problems at least not for a while
When a girl is around you she wants to forget her problems she wont want the burden of yours. Most girls will act receptive if you share problems but inside you know they would rather be having fun and forgetting their own problems. Sharing of problems is something to be done more when you are in a long term relationship or something that should be shared with friends.

 

[Captain]

Texting vs. Phoning
When making a date I find texting the best way to go, it takes the pressure off you to be charming and it gives you longer to think of a response. Talking on the phone takes away face to face advantages like eye contact and kino. Dont text too often and dont panic if you send a text and dont get a reply straight away, dont send another text until she responds

Calling is best. Every other chump texts, by calling you stand out a little more.

Ignore your instincts
With a lot of guys if a girl stops acting interested or doesnt reply to a text instincts tell them to call her or text her to find out what is going on. This is wrong and will let her know you are easy and she has you wrapped around her finger. I was very guilty of this in my last relationship, and I am trying to learn from my mistakes. Instincts also tell a guy that if he likes someone he should let her know and put himself on the line. This again makes you come across as needy, you should always wait for the girl to let her feelings known first and even when this happens proceed with caution and don't let it change you too much.

A man's instincts used to be useful, back in caveman days (be the alpha male, take the woman you want, be strong), but now men have been indoctrinated by society, and they think that what they want (sex) is somehow wrong. You need to embrace your instincts and take what you want instead of wondering if it's the "nice" thing to do.

 

[Zebedee]

A man's instincts used to be useful, back in caveman days (be the alpha male, take the woman you want, be strong), but now men have been indoctrinated by society, and they think that what they want (sex) is somehow wrong. You need to embrace your instincts and take what you want instead of wondering if it's the "nice" thing to do.

I see what you mean but a lot of people especially guys who are not confident around women have very bad instincts. For example if an AFC type of guy really likes a girl his instincts will more than likely tell him to tell her and make it obvious, the whole point of ignoring your instincts is to prevent this from happening. Another example a lot of guys have the instinct to ask questions to reassure themselves such as did you enjoy that, are you having fun, do you like me etc once again these instincts should be ignored. Believe me these are all mistakes that I have made countless times, I recently really started to think about things and was very honest about where I had gone wrong. It was the first time ive actually thought about the dating world with my brain rather than with my heart i.e. ignoring AFC instincts.