Something that happened quite a few times in my past was the following:
I'm dating a girl, it all seems to be going well, basking in afterglow I say something like "I really like you", a long silence follows and the girl changes the subject. The next morning she acts distant, stops returning my calls and I am left wondering what the hell just happened. I mean surely she feels the same way and if so what's the big deal?
I learnt from the experience and learnt to keep my big mouth shut but it always confused me how four small words could scare off a girl.
The other day I read an article by David D which offered an insight on this. To him expressing feelings for a girl triggered a feeling of revulsion in girls he called the "Instant Eww" and basically messed up your chances with her.
The problem is that girls are always thinking about the future in any relationship. They are always asking themselves where is this going.
When you say something like "I really like you" or otherwise communicate how you feel it messes things up and puts the girl in an awkward situation. You've created a turning point in the relationship. She interprets it as you pressuring her to take the relationship to the next level. And she freaks out. And ends things.
Before she felt that as you hadn't said anything then it wasn't serious, even though she knew you wanted her. So she was content to stick around with you until either she fell for you or found someone she liked better. In other words stringing you along.
And of course the problem is she does not feel the same way. If she did she would have probably said so already. Of course you may think she feels the same way. But that is probably a product of the male ego and the acting abilities of the female of the species.
girls will always decide where the relationship is going, as men all we have is the opt out clause (dump her ass). That is why it is best to play it cool until she makes it clear that she wants to take things to the next level.
I'm dating a girl, it all seems to be going well, basking in afterglow I say something like "I really like you", a long silence follows and the girl changes the subject. The next morning she acts distant, stops returning my calls and I am left wondering what the hell just happened. I mean surely she feels the same way and if so what's the big deal?
I learnt from the experience and learnt to keep my big mouth shut but it always confused me how four small words could scare off a girl.
The other day I read an article by David D which offered an insight on this. To him expressing feelings for a girl triggered a feeling of revulsion in girls he called the "Instant Eww" and basically messed up your chances with her.
The problem is that girls are always thinking about the future in any relationship. They are always asking themselves where is this going.
When you say something like "I really like you" or otherwise communicate how you feel it messes things up and puts the girl in an awkward situation. You've created a turning point in the relationship. She interprets it as you pressuring her to take the relationship to the next level. And she freaks out. And ends things.
Before she felt that as you hadn't said anything then it wasn't serious, even though she knew you wanted her. So she was content to stick around with you until either she fell for you or found someone she liked better. In other words stringing you along.
And of course the problem is she does not feel the same way. If she did she would have probably said so already. Of course you may think she feels the same way. But that is probably a product of the male ego and the acting abilities of the female of the species.
girls will always decide where the relationship is going, as men all we have is the opt out clause (dump her ass). That is why it is best to play it cool until she makes it clear that she wants to take things to the next level.
