The hardest struggle of the year

[tactic]

This is such a tough life for me. The way how it's going can't get any worse. Everything in me is lost. Faith, confidence, self-esteem, and respect.

Sometimes, life can treat you like sh*t, sometimes it doesn't. It's like a rollercoaster for some people, especially for me. Well it used to. Now, not only am i keep going down and down and down, but it's just not stopping! I'm having problems with the school, family, church, and myself.

School is very difficult for me because i have to deal with not only the work that is given, but the people around me. I barely talk to anyone. Not even one, well i do but not alot. Everyone is an acquaintance, it's just that i have a few friends but not close friends. Most guys think i'm a weak guy. Some guys think i'm stupid. Just the guys, now the girls too. I've lost respect of about 10 people. People talking behind my backs, people giving me looks, not looking at me, not responsive. Not trustworthy, i guess. I'm always sitting down, lonely and depressed, putting my head down everyday.

School is the hardest struggle of my life, it's part of my struggle-wholesome. Then comes the church; faith and the people there. I've gone to Church at least 4 times a week, spent hours there, prayed everyday, read the Bible, believed in God like no other. Then the people began to stop talking to me, as you know now i have low self-esteem, i began to get angry about it. My best friend spilled out the reason why i hate the Church so much, then i had to fight with this guy from the church, now it's looking bad for me in Church.

Church is a half and half of struggle of my life right now. Then comes family. My family is a family that you would want to be with only when they are happy. It's really disturbing to be with them when you do something bad or you don't listen. That's just a family and that's what families do, however, there are constant fights and conflicts between me and my family that just makes things worse with my life.

So after i realized i had these struggles, i decided to come back to Sosuave for answers, after losing hope, respect, love, and trust, i came back here. I make threads and then i realize i made one thread that got everyone to critisize about. I understand, it didn't make sense much. This forums isn't helping at all. Last year, there were posts and posts, many members who took time to help. There still are, but not as much and most of them are just rude guys. I even messaged several old members of the forums, they just ignore me or they don't seem to know sh*t anymore.

So where do i go now? Hopeless is all i can say now. I don't even need to live do i? Why have i struggled so much this year? What have i done that the world would just turn its back on me like that?

Gosh, this is hard. Guys, i'm sure you understand.

 

[penkitten]

take a deep breath.

you say you have alot of faith right?

have a sit down with god.
tell him whats on your mind.
tell him to stop dishing out things, he promised to only give us what we can handle, tell him you can handle nothing else, put all your troubles in his hands.

i think once you get this out with him, you will be able to handle your family and school issues better.

dont be afraid to tell god your troubles. if you have an ounce of faith in you, its worth a shot.

sometimes god gives us so much on purpose, he needs us to drop to our knees , ask him in our hearts, give our problems back to him and follow his lead.


what do you gotta loose by trying?

 

[Sugar Bee]

Why not talk to your counselor at school for some help?

Sounds like a weak bit of advice, but school counselors are there to help and guide you in confidence.

You seem to need more help than a public forum can provide.

Good luck!

 

[tactic]

you're right.. this is so hard man.. wish i could talk to someone like you right now though..

 

[padrote]

You sound like every other teen out there... except for the church thing. High school is not the defining chapter of your life.

 

[Julian]

Start lifting weights, trust me your life will change.

 

[tactic]

Oh not HS, just anywhere i learn or get educated with certain topics that i am interested in also is a school to me.

A public forum advice like this forum is actually good because the whole point of this forum is to get girls and to live a good life. I do agree that there are other places though.

 

[Levex]

you probably wont listen anyway but i'll give my opinion.

Forget about church and god for at least few months and forget everything your preacher told you. Go get drunk,smoke some herb, hook up with the skankiest girl around, talk sh1t to the people who talk sh1t about you, talk to random people about nonsense, hang out with new people and do stupid crazy sh1t. Start playing some kind of sport,something active like basketball, hit the pool or the beach as often as possible, go to the nearest poolhall and learn to play. If you're sitting home with nothing to do, go somewhere, doesnt matter where just get the fvck out of the house and talk to different people everytime you get a chance.

It may sound silly, but from personal experience i can tell you that as soon as you forget all the inhibitions and rules and just let lose,problems dont seem so bad anymore, and life becomes a lot more colorful and interesting for yourself and people around you.

 

[Julian]

hook up with the skankiest girl around,

I think you took it a step too far haha.

 

[Dimebag_Darrell]

Dude... You're situation is 90 percent identical with mines. At the beginning of the school yeah I was mr big ****. All the girls flocked to me and everyone wanted to be my friend. Now most of my closest girl friends seem to shun me, my closer friends have left the school to another school and now I only hang out with like 3 or 4 ppl. There are classes where I am in the company of people that talk behind my back and try to give me bad energy and it really makes school hard to get through. I try not to get too down on myself though.

I totally understand where you're coming from dude. tonight is prom night and I can't even go because I'm on house arrest and to make **** even better I'm not graduating this year for messing up so much. I feel like ending it all would be great but I gotta keep pushing my limits and so should you man. Although most won't say this but, try to embrace your darkness and downtrodden feelings rather than fighting them.

Man tell me more though about you because i feel like it might help me cope with the bullsh*t times I'm going through

 

[SELF-MASTERY]

hook up with the skankiest girl around, talk sh1t to the people who talk sh1t about you, talk to random people about nonsense, hang out with new people and do stupid crazy sh1t. Start playing some kind of sport,something active like basketball, hit the pool or the beach as often as possible, go to the nearest poolhall and learn to play. If you're sitting home with nothing to do, go somewhere, doesnt matter where just get the fvck out of the house and talk to different people everytime you get a chance.

Sounds like what you need, like what alot of us need.

People are awful, people are good. Your happiness is your own responsibility. If you cant make friends at school make them somewhere else, or don't depend on friendship to make you happy. You need some self-confidence, some edge, fu*k the world, stand up to the folks who fu*k with you.

 

[AC/DC]

Originally posted by Julian
Start lifting weights, trust me your life will change.

This statement holds so true, because I can vouch that "A healthy body leads to a healthy mind."

Everything will become better this way.

 

[MetalFortress]

Listen to Penkitten. God wants you to speak to Him what's on your heart, not to put on a front and be "righteous" or speak in "church speak". Whatever front we try to put up with God, He will see through anyways.

As for Levex's advice,

"Forget about church and god for at least few months and forget everything your preacher told you. Go get drunk,smoke some herb, hook up with the skankiest girl around, talk sh1t to the people who talk sh1t about you, "

this half sucks completely

"talk to random people about nonsense, hang out with new people and do stupid crazy sh1t. Start playing some kind of sport,something active like basketball, hit the pool or the beach as often as possible, go to the nearest poolhall and learn to play. If you're sitting home with nothing to do, go somewhere, doesnt matter where just get the fvck out of the house and talk to different people everytime you get a chance."

and this half is pretty good.

 

[skeeloo]

yeah life can be a ***** sometimes, you just have to go throught it . no matter what comes your way.
as for the girls losing repsct for you well you are the one to blame for that .
never let a girls view on you bring you down, because thier views dont really matter. i know guys that dont have many friends like 2 or three and are doing fine with thier lifes its all in your head your life dosnt suck that much like that. i could write a 5 page note about **** i been through you aint seen ****. lol

 

[Levex]

MetalFortress, sure that may have been a lil overboard but i wanted him to get the point. I was serious about the church thing though, if anything it makes you even more depressed.