the 'Game' ends one day...

[organizedconfusion]

THE ENDING OF THE 'GAME'

Okay , one of these days the 'Game' has to end- i hope
everyone knows that. Because when you meet that
one girl you fall on LOVE with, things like compromise,
understanding, patience and sacrifice comes into play.

Don't be fooled or brainwashed into believing that
everything still goes when it comes to serious relationships.
Sure, you still have to be 'Da Man' and hold your ground-
but don't be suprised if you have to compromise your
choices, actions , etc. in order to keep the relationship healthy
and balanced.
Please do NOT be fooled that all it takes is to use
'power plays' or tactics (high value/status)and thats all it
takes to maintain a healthy relationship.

I have been in two serious relationships, both lasting about
3 years ea. I for one , was the 'my way of no way type'.
And it was very very similar to the menatlity they teach in
the DYD programs and also similar to DJ teachings.
Not only til i realized that mentality creates resentment
and alot of anger in the relationship.
Is this a girl that you love and respect?
or is this just 'another girl'.
This dosen't mean dropping your nutts and permanently
gluing you lips to a girls a$$, what it means is that
there must be compromise...
sometimes ALOT of it.

Understanding, emotional/mental support ,patience,
being mature and being a MAN about things.

I have a nagging suspicion that alot of guys that have never
had serious relationships or girlfriends may make alot
of mistakes-fearing that they will be 'AFC' or whatever
non-sense,and that the girl will leave or cheat.
Use your head bro! AFC basicly means anything that translates
into being insecure-That's all. So if you stay clear of doing things
that project insecurity and naturally repell people-it's all good!
By holding back and not fully letting yourself go, it
will totally limit your satisfation and enjoyment of the
entire relationship.

I can't help but laugh in my mind that there are guys
'pulling back' when they really want to talk about things
with their girlfriend or wanting to buy flowers to suprise her
but feel like a chump for doing it-
give me a break!

anyways, for all the guys that has never been in a serious
relationship before..you're in for a really really really
big suprise.Because even if you CAN get the beautyfull
girl , will you know what to do when it comes to
keeping a quality woman and maintaining the
romance and attraction of a long term relationship?

how many more tricks are you gonna have to pull out of the bag?
What are you gonna do when you are faced with a dilema
and you HAVE to be a man and no book no teachings
no routines to help you?
will YOU know what to do?

Are you gonna trust yourself to make the right descision?

Are you gonna be yourself or are you gonna be the 'persona'
or 'pseudo-self'?
And if so , don't you think it's kinda SAD that you have to
put on such an act with someone you love soo dearly?
when she is genuine and real and you are..
ACTING.

Dating and picking up girls is fun and but that's nothing
compared to having a really intense relationship-
were there is actually a connection and bond between the
two of you.Don't be fooled that you have to be some
arrogant jerk off in order to attract, meet and keep
a spectacular girl- if thats who you naturally are-
fantastic.
But if it's just a 'persona'-and it's not how you really are...
what's gonna happen when that persona goes down..will she
still be around?
After all, you did attract her with the little tricks and gimmicks
and 'acting' like an 'alpha' , right?
What's her reaction gonna be when and if you reveil the
real you?
Whatever it may be? however dorky, nerdy, whatever
quirks about you it may be? whatever that makes you unique
and makes you different from every tom,steve and harry out there?

If you guys think that a few magic tricks and
acting 'alpha' is all it takes to be a man and hold
an exceptional woman..you are in for a BIG surpise...

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

DJ Mathematics

Ah, time once again for some DJ math. Let's get out our calculators again gentlemen it's time for another word problem:

ORGANIZEDCONFUSION is 25 and has had 2 'serious relationships' lasting 3 years each; how old was ORGANIZED when he began his first 'serious relationship'?

If you answered 19 you are correct!

BONUS QUESTION: Judging from ORGANIZED's initital post, how many women do you suppose he's been intimately invloved with in the 6 year span of his 'serious relationships'?

If you answered 2 you are correct!

Extrapolating from this information and the nature of this post, we can reasonably predict that ORGANIZED still has a lot of learning left to do.

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

FRIVs POST

Sorry FRIV, didn't mean to delete your post

Extrapolating from this information and the nature of this post, we can reasonably predict that ORGANIZED still has a lot of learning left to do.

you mean he is not old, bitter, and claims its wonderful to be in there late 30's and single with no kids..and will be 60 when there son is 16?

I know ur married with kids Rollo...but I dont buy that its a great life to be without a family and still sarging for the majority of your life...just because it didnt workout with previous womwn.



so maybe its better to say he is young and positive

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

Well either that or he (and you) can be a married AFC, completely beholden and supllicating to the ONE woman he settled on in a never ending effort to earn her intimacy because he lacked both the experience to know how to be selective and the self-security to understand that he can be.

 

[WestCoaster]

As my married DJ friend says, being a DJ helps the woman nearly as much as the man.

Tricks? Yeah, you won't need some of the tricks and tips here, but you will need to be grounded in the DJ philosophy that 90 percent of the people on this site have ignored.

Read Allen Thompson -- the founder of this site -- he has some GREAT articles. They can be found on the home page links. They are golden and useful for first timers, newbies, guys in LTR, divorced guys, and married guys. It's the DJ philosophy, which has been diluted on the message boards into narcissistic and AFC bull crap.

 

[TheTrader]

It's always a question of security vs freedom, most people are security guys but i will never be totally dependant on anyone, never again will i let myself get into situations of weakness.

and a man doesnt have to know how to keep a great woman, the woman has to know how to keep a great man. thinking about doing this and that to keep a woman comes from the AFC mindset.

 

[organizedconfusion]

Re: DJ Mathematics

Originally posted by Rollo Tomassi
Ah, time once again for some DJ math. Let's get out our calculators again gentlemen it's time for another word problem:

ORGANIZEDCONFUSION is 25 and has had 2 'serious relationships' lasting 3 years each; how old was ORGANIZED when he began his first 'serious relationship'?

If you answered 19 you are correct!

BONUS QUESTION: Judging from ORGANIZED's initital post, how many women do you suppose he's been intimately invloved with in the 6 year span of his 'serious relationships'?

If you answered 2 you are correct!

Extrapolating from this information and the nature of this post, we can reasonably predict that ORGANIZED still has a lot of learning left to do.

actually Kojack , i had my first serious relationship when i
was , get this-14
and the second when i was..get his17-
that lasted til i was about 20-
after that one i basicly just played girls after that...

i started young...like really young...like 8 years old young-
when i developed my first 'puppy love crush',
i m very very lucky to have anchored positive feelings towards
the opposite sex at such an early age when i think about it...
throughout the years i got more and more into 'girls'-
until i was 14 then i had a real 'serious relationship'.

What in the world could a 14 year old go through in
order to consider it serious?
well, first of all- her mom had died the previous year of
breast cancer and her dad was an abusive alcohalic
not only that, but she was also being molested by her uncle.

I was her only savior and i protected her from them.
She was only 12 when i met her, i was 14-
we ran away together ,we slept in hotels, we had to
steal cup o'noodles to eat...we went through more then
any 'lil kids' had to go through.And we had to grow up
real quick.Combining her family problems with mine
and also my delinquincy problems..we had alot to handle.
One of the hardest years in my life.

I ended things ..because there was NO compromise.
I demaned that she stay home more and she wanted
to go out too often (we were kids, what can i say?)
I also was very very very one sided on the 'rules' ,
either my way or no way.We argued, we faught
alot, we went through alot together.My real regret is that
i became as abusive to her as her father, not hitting her
or anything-but i verbaly and mentally.


I met another girl, we were perfect & we were both 17.
This relationship was alot more calm then the last one.
We did everything together, she eventually moved in
with my family and was one of us.Everyone loved her.
Everything was all good, so i thougt- we were the type
that never argued.Sure we had some rough times, but
when the tough got tougher-it ended.
...guess why?
Lack of compromise- i wanted to get
married , and she wanted a career as a flight attendent.
I wanted things done MY WAY, then listening to her side of the
story and then considering it...i was and still am stubborn as a
mule..so is she. I thought we were perfect in the beggining
because we never faught, but when we did-it ended
because we just couldn'nt meet in the middle.
And my temper came back as well, this girl was smart and
didn't take it.

She left back to her moms house...we were on a 'break'.
But i thought it would be a bright idea to write her a letter
to officially break things off..big mistake, i was begging
for her to come back in a week...another Big mistake on my part.She never came back and i was devastated.
I truly loved that girl and wanted to marry her, i am
glad i didn't though- i was still way too young.

I got into the 'seduction' thing, before i even knew about
the community even existed... hell, even before i know about
the word seduction.. i just knew that i was good with girls.
But my mindset was way out of whack,I had the ability to do so -
but my motivations remained unhealthy and destructive in
general. I was pissed off and one way of controling
woman was to seduce them and make them fall in love and
then leave them.Some psychologists might say that i am repeating the same thing that hurt me in the past and that
by doing so ..i am taking control and becoming the victimizer-
no longer the victim.The truth was, i was hurting myself
more then ever with my horrible mindset i was developing
concerning woman in general.

 

[Jamo]

well

It better not be a one-sided compromise. That is a surefire recipie for failure. A prime example of "compromise" would be Captain AFC's post. Id rather suffer being single than go through such a horror story. The game never ends....it might become more mellow but it never truly ends.

 

[organizedconfusion]

Originally posted by Rollo Tomassi
Well either that or he (and you) can be a married AFC, completely beholden and supllicating to the ONE woman he settled on in a never ending effort to earn her intimacy because he lacked both the experience to know how to be selective and the self-security to understand that he can be.

Woah again there Kojack , i for one has NEVER been the type to
worship a woman or be on my hands and knees to her.
It's usually my way or no way and i have no problems at all
developing a genuine tight emotional bond with a woman.

It's that connection and love that made he stick around,
that it's because of patience and sacrifice that we both have to
make in order for the relationship to work.If i was the one doing
all the work , wouldn't it be clearly obvious that it wasn't balanced? or vice versa?
not like it always being my way or no way was balanced either
or anything... it just takes more then what alot of
people 'assume' that it takes to keep, maintain and sustain
a long lasting HEALTHY relationship..and it takes TWO to
tango , NOT my lips surgicly inplanted on her ass or her nose stuck on my nutts 24/4.

I think that alot of guys minds are completly warped by
the DJ or whatever 'rules' they have set for themselves..
i have done the same- but they must understand that
sometimes you must bend the rules when common sense
says so in order to stay sane or keep the relationship balanced.

c'mon..i am only 25 and i know that



has anyone here even HAD a loving , lasting RELATIONSHIP?
has anyone here even just stopped the charade and just put
down the persona and just be free to be themselves for
a split second? to just for a second be completly vulnurable and
free in the moment with a woman?
Everyone claims to have 'choice' but what's the big deal with
choice when you always meet the wrong girls?
Show me a man that has picked up 300 girls in a year without getting into a relationship and i'll show you a sad man..show me a man that has two semi/LT-loving relationships with two spectacular woman in that year..and i'll show you the true meaning of a real man/DJ...

 

[WestCoaster]

Once again, Friv completely ignores the basics of DJism.

He posted this:

*******************

you mean he is not old, bitter, and claims its wonderful to be in there late 30's and single with no kids..and will be 60 when there son is 16?

****************************

No one said anything about sarging their whole life, but instead beholding to DJ principles. I see married AFCs every day, they are the most pathetic creatures. There's hope for the single AFC, there's little to no hope for the married AFC.

There's nothing worse than surrendering your pride and dignity to please another person ... especially one who doesn't respect your pride and dignity.

Once again, homework assignment for all: Go to a big box store this weekend, count the married AFCs and ask yourself if you want to be getting yelled at by an ugly woman in front of other people.

I'm continually amazed how the posters here don't take the p-ssyfication and AFCing of society seriously. Stunning.

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

Re: Re: DJ Mathematics

Originally posted by organizedconfusion
actually Kojack , i had my first serious relationship when i
was , get this-14
and the second when i was..get his17-
that lasted til i was about 20-
after that one i basicly just played girls after that...

i started young...like really young...like 8 years old young-
when i developed my first 'puppy love crush',
i m very very lucky to have anchored positive feelings towards
the opposite sex at such an early age when i think about it...
throughout the years i got more and more into 'girls'-
until i was 14 then i had a real 'serious relationship'.

:crackup:

Hehheheheh,..

Could somone else take this guy for me, I think I just broke a rib from laughing so hard,...

 

[organizedconfusion]

Re: well

Originally posted by Jamo
It better not be a one-sided compromise. That is a surefire recipie for failure. A prime example of "compromise" would be Captain AFC's post. Id rather suffer being single than go through such a horror story. The game never ends....it might become more mellow but it never truly ends.

compromise means to me meeting in the middle somewhere that
we can both aggree on.NOT completly compromising my needs
or her's need's just to keep things alive..that ridiculous.

True, it never really ends because i am still into suprises and
my special little ways of keeping the romance alive and kickin'...

i just have a feeling that guys are second guessing everything that they are doing because they are afraid to be
too 'afc' or worried that they are supplicating or lowering
their 'value' and fear of losing a girl because of it..give me
a break already....

 

[organizedconfusion]

Re: Re: Re: DJ Mathematics

Originally posted by Rollo Tomassi
:crackup:

Hehheheheh,..

Could somone else take this guy for me, I think I just broke a rib from laughing so hard,...

don't let the age fool you... i been through alot at such a young
age and i had to learn the hard way how much courage and
heart it takes to really care about another person..
i could've abused that girl but i chose to stick by her side and
be there for her when no one else was. Yes , i may have been
only really young, but we both had to deal with adult issues...

 

[organizedconfusion]

Originally posted by frivolousz21
why take it serious?

it doenst effect me.

it never will...I dont date america..I am dating 1 women..who loves and respects me...why bother with the rest.


if another man cant hold is own..then thats his deal.

but to set rules..just to prevent being hurt is fycking retarted nothing is better then to be completely free, trusting and vulnerable..in love...period.

if you have been in love you knwo this..and if you havent been in love..then I hope you are one day.

but if you always try controlling then you wont ever get this.

Amen, geez finally someone who isn't compelty brainwashed!!

 

[legolas]

It always amazes me when guys post questions such as "When do I stop doing what I'm doing and return to my normal self" Incredibly enough many guys' normal self means they become boring and predictable in their LTRs and soon are faced with problems with the girl losing interest.

So in a way, you should make gaming a prt of life, but that depends on your personal definition of the word. If by "game" you mean acting as a DJ when truly at heart you are hoping to find THE ONE and "settle down" Watch out. Better read Fings' weapons of mass seduction through the DJ Bible link above before you screw things up and hurt yourself.

 

[organizedconfusion]

..personally , i really enjoy romancing and keeping things exciting and fun in my relationships (i am not sure if this is a teaching
in becoming a DJ or anything). I just think that it would be
sad, like i said- if guys out there were second guessing every
little thing they did, in fear of being seen as 'afc' or 'lower value'
and loose a girl because of it.


finding or meeting 'the one' is no different from meeting any other girl. The only difference really is how well we click and if things head that direction naturally..it's not like i am gonna be
completly obsessed over her and worship every girl i meet
like they are 'the one' or anything... that would be 'afc'

 

[organizedconfusion]

Originally posted by WestCoaster

No one said anything about sarging their whole life, but instead beholding to DJ principles. I see married AFCs every day, they are the most pathetic creatures. There's hope for the single AFC, there's little to no hope for the married AFC.

There's nothing worse than surrendering your pride and dignity to please another person ... especially one who doesn't respect your pride and dignity.

Once again, homework assignment for all: Go to a big box store this weekend, count the married AFCs and ask yourself if you want to be getting yelled at by an ugly woman in front of other people.

I'm continually amazed how the posters here don't take the p-ssyfication and AFCing of society seriously. Stunning.

i aggree , that is a sad sight and i do see that type of treatment
of men being tormented by morbidly obese woman...
some guys don't stand up for themselves and aren't assertive to
getting their needs met, so they settle for tubby mean woman...
sad..

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

Originally posted by organizedconfusion
finding or meeting 'the one' is no different from meeting any other girl.

Will someone shoot me now?

Why am I not suprised that you subscribe to the soulmate myth? Perhaps you could toddle over to eHarmony.com and find your ONE over there? I heard they were selling them over there.

For fvck sake,... there is no ONE. There are some good Ones and there are some bad Ones, but there is no ONE.

Lay off the romantic comedies and Dr. Phill for a while, it'll do you a world of good.

 

[Royal Elite]

Bottom Line:
Every one here just like Everyone on Earth only desire is to be happy.

So if you are with a girl that makes you happy and you also make her happy that is all that matters.

Monogamy isnt for every guy just as poloygamy isnt for every guy.

Find you and do what works for you as long as at the end of the day you are happy.

If being with 1 woman and sharing everything with her makes you happy then do that, if it doesn't than dont.

But bottom line-if you are playing games to get a girl attracted to you, you are a AFC because you are NOT doing whatever YOU want to be happy.
An alpha male is someone who does what "he wants" in order to be happy; so if you dont want to play games and you are doing them just to get the girl how does that make you an alpha. You are "pretending" to be one thereby you are changing your own behavior just to get that girl-sounds like supplicating to me. But too each his own.

 

[frivolousz21]

Bottom Line:
Every one here just like Everyone on Earth only desire is to be happy.

So if you are with a girl that makes you happy and you also make her happy that is all that matters.

Monogamy isnt for every guy just as poloygamy isnt for every guy.

Find you and do what works for you as long as at the end of the day you are happy.

If being with 1 woman and sharing everything with her makes you happy then do that, if it doesn't than dont.

But bottom line-if you are playing games to get a girl attracted to you, you are a AFC because you are NOT doing whatever YOU want to be happy.
An alpha male is someone who does what "he wants" in order to be happy; so if you dont want to play games and you are doing them just to get the girl how does that make you an alpha. You are "pretending" to be one thereby you are changing your own behavior just to get that girl-sounds like supplicating to me. But too each his own.

------------------------------------------------------------

royal where have you been?


solid post!