The final key.................

[Made.To.Be.Great]

I need your help on this one, fellas:

I'm workin' on myself for months now and I'm very satisfied: my body, my clothes, my hair... everything is straight! I get a lot of compliments and I know that I'm good-looking, therefore I'm more confident now, too! I read the *DJ Bible* and parts of the *Reading Guide* and it helped me to understand what women really want and need. But I still have one problem...

...WHAT DO I ACTUALLY SAY WHEN I FINALLY APPROACH A GIRL???

I know that I should not use average pick-up-lines, I know that I should say something funny/interesting about the certain situation or the certain girl, I know that 'Hi' is always the way to set things up, BUT all of these things are not really helpful when I'm in the club and I wanna talk to that fly girl over there! Just sayin' 'Hi' is simple, but what comes afterwards? Something funny/interesting?! Sometimes the situations are just not funny/interesting...

I feel like I have everything to be a true Don Juan... I have the looks, I'm confident, smart, and open... but this one prolem is always slowin' me and my progress down!

Now you might think that I don't approach girls because I fear them too much... but that is not true, I do approach girls and I'm willing to approach even more if I would know what I should say.

Please, picture this situation and let me know what you would say/do (this happened to me last night, more than once):

You are at a club/bar/store/whatever. You are walkin' by a nice girl. She's lookin' at you. You are lookin' at her. She's smilin' at you. You are smilin' at her. You have never seen her before. She's not doing anything special. She's not wearing anything special. You wanna get her number... what now?

Please, help me out on this one... give me a good advice or a helpful link! THIS IS THE LAST KEY THAT I NEED IN ORDER TO BECOME A DON JUAN!

Thanx!

 

[Austin Allegro]

Just talk about anything. It's called 'phatic communication', meaning you are talking about nothing in particular but what you are really doing is saying 'I am a human being and I want to make a connection with you'.

In England the usual way of doing it is to talk about the weather, but I find it best to just talk about something to do with the current situation you can both relate to, eg the music in the club etc. Keep the questions 'open', ie say things that she can't answer with a simple yes or no, so that the conversation flows better.

 

[So pimp its scary]

It's been said before, if your feet will walk you up to the woman your mouth will back you up.

How would you go up to a guy and start a conversation? You could start with 'hello', or comment on anything in the vicinity...

Do a search for pimpologist, he's got a couple in depth workings of a conversation drawn out.

 

[Evil-Rom]

Originally posted by Made.To.Be.Great
Please, help me out on this one... give me a good advice or a helpful link!

The only link you will ever need.

 

[Dirtheart]

I second most of the previous posts, phatic communication is the key I believe.

I recently scored a date with a hot Italian girl. I just hung around after one of my lectures and when she looked at me I smiled and said hello. I then asked her how she finds the lectures and the conversation progressed from there. I asked her what she does when she's not at university (here's the point where I'd have asked her out if she hadn't beat me to it) and she mentioned she goes out with friends and suggested that I go out with them some time and I took her up on it, but we've now decided to make it just the two of us.

An easy way to get a date with a girl I'd never spoken to before with no anticipation of rejection and no rehearsed chat up lines - just a polite "hello" and "how are you finding these lectures?"


Btw. About an hour ago I did the same thing with a girl I kind of know who I saw washing her car. I said "I expect you'll be annoyed if it starts to rain in the next hour". We started chatting trivially ("How are you?" "What are you doing these days?" etc). I asked if she is seeing someone. She said she has a new boyfriend. I asked her how it was working out and said I was pleased for her. We continued speaking and I left with no loss of dignity. It was just a polite chat between acquaintances.

Had she said she was not seeing someone, I might've suggested we go out some time. If she responded well, I'd have tried to set a date or closed with her number.

Just try not to think too urgently. If you're going to ask a girl out, I've learned it's best not to focus on it. Wait for the right time and don't put too much emphasis on it.

 

[Made.To.Be.Great]

Thanx for your help, gentlemen! Especially Dirtheart's examples are very helpful... it makes it easier for me to REALLY understand the entire process!