The Ego Epidemic

[goundra]

men who really CAN inspire such women to be loyal to them are few and far between, guys. So of course such women are often single, and to my way of thinking, can STAY alone. Give me a young, traditional, beautiful, low cost, totally feminine Filipina, any day.

 

[backbreaker]

Why did you call it your greatest weakness a few posts up and now say you've never seen ego as a bad thing?

Barbecue it's my flaw. There will be a point, and there have been points in my ilfe where it will be my biggest detriment. However it's like a good football offensive minded coach who can't win the big game beucase he doesn't put out lights out defenses.. some fans will ***** that he needs to change his game up but his game is what got him there to be playing on the big stage in the first place. In short a tiger can't change his strips.

Look at Bill Clinton; his biggest strength was just how personable and charismatic he was. His biggest weakness? how personable and charismatic he was.. he could .. and did.. charm anyone he wanted. Jimmy Carter.. biggest strength, probably the most meticulous president we have ever had.. he had to have his hands on everything. his biggest weakness while in office? his meticulous nature turned him into a policy wonk who was more concerned about reading every page in a 500 page bill and patting himself on the back because of it instead of delegating it and running the country. My mother.. as much as we don't get alone.. spitting image of me personality wise. coudl not possibly be any more alike. she like me, dispises pettiness, always have to be working on something, are very detail oriented people who have very little time for messing around with things that do not matter. it's why we can go months with out talking to each other and either of us could care less.. her biggest weakness and why she is still single now.. she doesn't feel like she has time to be courted, she has a very low tolerance level for men who she thinks she's better than. The same traits that took her out of the hood and got her a masters degree and put a very nice roof over her head and rise 2 outstanding kids, is what's gonna keep her single most likely until she dies. i'm convinced of it.


my entire point is, you have to accept who you are and work within the boundaries of it, assuming that your ego/self esteem is real and not validated. if it's fake, you need to first get realistic.

 

[Solomon]

they become even more b*tchier, entitled and unpleasant to be around. Their hangups become even more pronounced. It's like they figure they hung out for so long waiting for Mr. Big to show up that nothing less will do. There's nothing worse than a woman with all of the downsides of younger women and none of the benefits.

^^This, I'm dating an older woman now who use to be a model (time has caught up with her though...very hard) and you can tell she still is *****y and has an entilted attidude, the shyt doesn't fly with me tho and she knows that

 

[betheman]

the ego...the sun revolves around me and even shines out of my ar$e at the same time!

belief in the self, confidence, fine, self promotion of such belief, inflated boasts..all a masive turn off, male or female, yeah people buy it , for a short while. its bull$hit though. massive egeo is denial of human flaws, and any human has flaws, ergo, big ego = denial of ones failings, promoting only that which he/she wants the world to see, to promote belief.
ego is lke blood pressure, too much/too little is unhealthy.

I avoid either end of that scale

 

[Warrior74]

Barbecue it's my flaw.

Barbecue is my flaw too bro. I had some pulled pork sammiches today for lunch. So full of flaw and weakness and fatty caloric goodness.

 

[mrRuckus]

by definition all big egos are fragile because they are all based on delusion. The delusion is that you are somehow so much more special than anyone else.

I don't know if this is "by definition." If you have a delusion, I don't necessarily think it's brought to its knees by any sort of evidence to the contrary. If one has this truly big ego, then I'd think you would be as likely to brush off some girl rejecting you as HER being the defective one too stupid to realize you're awesome than it is that your world would come crashing down as reality shows up in your face. Wasn't this actually demonstrated in the original post with the women who would get mad that some stupid (in their mind) guy didn't know how great she was?

I also don't think ego and self confidence are the same, while they're related. I can have self confidence without thinking I'm better than other people. If I just walk into a situation and know I can handle it because I've dealt with this sh1t before, and I know that while I'm not necessarily that much better than anyone else, if at all, this also would mean that I'm not worse than other people so there's no reason not to be confident.

And I do want to make one thing clear. I believe people's abilities and such do differ, and some people are just better than others both OVERALL and individually by categories. I know some of my abilities are better than others and some are worse than others. This isn't some delusion. I know everyone has minor errors in judgement with our built in cognitive biases, but well adjusted people usually have SOME idea that hey that girl over there is prettier than me or that guy throws a baseball harder than me. It's all well and good to say everyone is equal under the law, but we surely aren't all the same in the real world. The ego problem comes in when you think are better at an activity or all-around but are just plain wrong. The women in the article wouldn't be that big of a deal if their feelings actually had some real world to back it up.

Outer "displays" of confidence are masking inner lack of it. If they're truly confident you wouldn't know it. The most insecure women are the loudmouth slvts.

That's not what I meant when I used that phrase in what you quoted. I don't mean the sort of crazy displays and outright statements of it as we associate with egos. Confidence is still seen because the person who just walks right into a situation like "let me take care of this" is probably confident, and it's outright visible without them purposely making a display of it. That's what I was talking about. Women seem to be turned on by that sort of confidence, while if I see a woman doing that, it does nothing for me, so I never understand when I hear that confidence is sexy in women.

I just don't want women to be so low in confidence that they're hiding their bodies under the sheets like idiots or are to the point that I have to listen to them complain about it.

Eh, this is off topic from the original posts anyway.

 

[backbreaker]

I don't know if this is "by definition." If you have a delusion, I don't necessarily think it's brought to its knees by any sort of evidence to the contrary. If one has this truly big ego, then I'd think you would be as likely to brush off some girl rejecting you as HER being the defective one too stupid to realize you're awesome than it is that your world would come crashing down as reality shows up in your face. Wasn't this actually demonstrated in the original post with the women who would get mad that some stupid (in their mind) guy didn't know how great she was?

I also don't think ego and self confidence are the same, while they're related. I can have self confidence without thinking I'm better than other people. If I just walk into a situation and know I can handle it because I've dealt with this sh1t before, and I know that while I'm not necessarily that much better than anyone else, if at all, this also would mean that I'm not worse than other people so there's no reason not to be confident.

And I do want to make one thing clear. I believe people's abilities and such do differ, and some people are just better than others both OVERALL and individually by categories. I know some of my abilities are better than others and some are worse than others. This isn't some delusion. I know everyone has minor errors in judgement with our built in cognitive biases, but well adjusted people usually have SOME idea that hey that girl over there is prettier than me or that guy throws a baseball harder than me. It's all well and good to say everyone is equal under the law, but we surely aren't all the same in the real world. The ego problem comes in when you think are better at an activity or all-around but are just plain wrong. The women in the article wouldn't be that big of a deal if their feelings actually had some real world to back it up.

I mean, this is my point. I'm not ****y to the point where i think i'm some sort of green god or some **** but, i look ****ing great. If i go to a pool party and i take my shirt off and i'm one of 2 guys that has abs out of 20, what the **** is the point in telling myself i'm no better than anyone else around me when i clearly am lol? that's what i don't get. It's like people have this hell bent notion on staying equal with everyone. As the great Naploelan said (the pig not the dictator lol)" all animals are created equal; but some animals are more equal than others."

The women in the article wouldn't be that big of a deal if their feelings actually had some real world to back it up.

that's the point. if you read the article carefully, there wasn't one guy that was turned off by the women's ego. they were turned off beucase the ego's were nothing but hot air... one guy stated the woman was not drop dead gorgeous or had anything about her life to back up what she considered herself to be.

 

[st_99]

I don't actually think the ego or a big ego is bad. Its not really bad or good, it just is. I think awareness is the key. Like some people get so lost in their ego its destructive.

I think shy people are and example. I think shyness stems from a big ego that needs protecting and one way to protect is to avoid anything that can harm it. So shy people just wont say anything, wont engage in society because they are afraid to hurt what they've built themeselves up to be or in their head OR there self absorption has them believe that the world is judging them, another form of self importance. The truth is, you can make a total ass out of yourself and a half hour later nobody cares, excpet you, you think that you're ruined as if the world is THAT focused on you. LOL. Thats ego!

I could be wrong, but thats how i see it.

 

[taiyuu_otoko]

... she mentioned something which I feel is at the core of the problem described in the article:

There is too much focus on kids nowadays.

This is ONE of the prime reasons. As the Jesuits were fond of saying back in the day:

"Give me a child at birth and when he's 7 he'll be a soldier for Christ."

What this means is that WHATEVER you drill into a kids brain when they grow up, they'll end up BELIEVING that their whole lives.

religion, political affiliation (yep kids soak this stuff up from parents) limiting beliefs, you name it. Once it's set, it's set.

The only exception, of course is Santa Claus, Easter Bunny, etc, but then they lose that belief because they are met with an overwhelming amount of evidence to the contrary, as well as HUGE social proof (only idiots believe in Santa Claus after 3rd grade, or whatever).

You combine this with a politically charged entitlement mentality, a feminist led entitlement mentality and BOY HOWDY is society fvkking itself in the a$$ with a tobasco covered dildo.

You might argue that the chickens of the sixties (or LBJ's "Great Society") are finally coming home to roost.

It's like a perfect storm of society destroying heinousness.

 

[taiyuu_otoko]

by definition all big egos are fragile because they are all based on delusion. The delusion is that you are somehow so much more special than anyone else.

From what I understand, and kind of believe, ALL egos are delusional. The ego is the idea that any aspect of self is equal to behavior.

The belief is that you have a big ego because you've accomplished a lot, or because you've accomplished a lot, you can justify your big ego.

Since you're always feeling the need to "prove" yourself, your "ego" is ALWAYS on the defensive. Or rather, you believe you need to "defend" your ego from others.

Because EVERYBODY, according to their ego, has the same "fear" deep deep in their subconscious:

I'm Not Good Enough.

It could be argued that ALL of our accomplishments, rationalizations, lightening quick shell-games of the mind are ALL designed to keep US and everybody ELSE from finding out the alleged, or deeply feared "truth" from ourselves:

I'm Not Good Enough.

Confidence is a belief, based on experience, that you can handle the experience you happen to be in. If you've approached hundreds of chicks, and are still alive, then you are "confident" when it comes to talking to women, and you WON'T radiate the fear that drives ego protection, and girls will naturally enjoy talking to you.

A world class pianist might be scared witless talking to a 5.5 in a club, but he'd have ZERO problems playing to a packed hall of Hollywood movie stars simply because he has situational confidence.

On the other hand, a guy that was just learning to play the piano, and found himself at a party where some slightly better piano player was hitting on his girl (who happened to love piano players) he might feel the need to protect his EGO for fear of being FOUND OUT to be a crappy piano player.

If you want to watch a REALLY good movie that deals with dealing with and dismantling the ego, check out Guy Ritchie's Revolver.

Absolutely fantastic. Or at the very least, see the crux of the movie, the elevator scene, here: Elevator scene.

 

[Colossus]

Displays of confidence from women is actually more annoying than anything unless it's something like sexually with me. Hell, i think a small lack of confidence is cute or endearing more than I think confidence is a turn on.

Vulnerability is very attractive in a woman, at least some degree of it. I think that's part of the reason men are attracted to younger females---they have this naivete and vulnerability that is appealing. I think deep down all guys want to be admired to some degree by their woman; it's a component of the whole respect thing.

 

[Who Dares Win]

This thread alone explains the reason of the problems of 80% of people inside here and a good half of the problems of this society.

Most guys here would be fine and happy in the society of the 80s while a good half would fine without the collaterla effect of cellphones and social networks.

From shy guys who turned like that due to mistreatment from girls to bitter guys who have been victims of unnecessary frustration, the first and sole starting problem is the attitude women have in general.

Nobody says that they should not have standard, but what is mandatory is for them to recongnize that they are no above men nor such kind of behaviours and aggressivity and lack of emphaty toward them is acceptable.

 

[Burroughs]

This thread alone explains the reason of the problems of 80% of people inside here and a good half of the problems of this society.

Most guys here would be fine and happy in the society of the 80s while a good half would fine without the collaterla effect of cellphones and social networks.

From shy guys who turned like that due to mistreatment from girls to bitter guys who have been victims of unnecessary frustration, the first and sole starting problem is the attitude women have in general.

Nobody says that they should not have standard, but what is mandatory is for them to recongnize that they are no above men nor such kind of behaviours and aggressivity and lack of emphaty toward them is acceptable.

I'll give anyone 10:1 odds....in 15 years time women will be able to press charges on men who even LOOK AT HER....women will say she was 'eye raped'

...and the laws of state will back her up...and so will legions of faggotized men who will only feel complete when they get to jump in front of a bullet to save a womyn.

We are heading into dark times for men...but only a few see the writing on the wall...the state has made 99% of men into chattal slaves to womyn through onerous alimony laws, societal shaming, and media brainwashing.

...but there is no outcry

...at the end of day most men are hollow drones who simply seek to live their lives eking what meager dollops of pleasure women and the state see fit to dole out....this is called 'being a realist' :crackup: :crackup:

 

[Solomon]

I'll give anyone 10:1 odds....in 15 years time women will be able to press charges on men who even LOOK AT HER....women will say she was 'eye raped'

...and the laws of state will back her up...and so will legions of faggotized men who will only feel complete when they get to jump in front of a bullet to save a womyn.

We are heading into dark times for men...but only a few see the writing on the wall...the state has made 99% of men into chattal slaves to womyn through onerous alimony laws, societal shaming, and media brainwashing.

...but there is no outcry

...at the end of day most men are hollow drones who simply seek to live their lives eking what meager dollops of pleasure women and the state see fit to dole out....this is called 'being a realist' :crackup: :crackup:

ROFLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

someone forget to take their meds today

 

[Burroughs]

ROFLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

someone forget to take their meds today

says the faggot who jerks off to Zyzz all day :crackup: