The dreaded Friend Zone, is it worth escaping?

New_Age_Prodigy

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*Posted this in Mature, but I figured I would post it here as well*

What's up guys? First post, but an active lurker on the forums. I was just wondering if it is worth the effort to try and escape the dreaded friend zone?

My situation is a little, well, complex so to speak. I've known this girl for probably eight years now, and we are still pretty close friends. I first met her when she was hired on where I currently work. Anyway, we worked in the same department and the entire time I kind of had this crush on her, but I never said anything. Fast forward a couple of years, and I have become sort of obsessed with my appearance, i.e. watching what I eat, going to the gym, etc. During this time, the girl and I have become pretty decent friends, yet I still have never made a move to ask her out whatsoever. Come to find out, this chic is bi, and was sort of seeing a girl that she met one night out with her girlfriends; this is where it gets even more weird.

The girl that she is seeing is an intern where we work, and she was pretty damn hot as well. Since the girl in question never really showed in interest, I started to develop a crush for her, eh, girlfriend, I guess. Anyway, months later we started to hang out more as a group, and this chic's girlfriend was into my from what I could tell. After a couple more months, the two split and I started to see the intern chic. During this period of time, the friendship I had developed with the girl in question had been strained quite a bit.

Fast forward months later. The intern girl and I split, because she was pretty psychotic (that's another story), and the girl in question has gone through a couple of relationships, one with a guy and then one with a girl where we worked. During this time we kind of mend fences because we realize that our friendship is worth more than some psychotic intern chic. During this time period, the girl in question and a group of individuals go out to the bar to have a couple of drinks, where I get a little intoxicated and admit that I have had a crush on girl in question for some time but never said anything. She then proceeds to tell me the same thing, which kind of surprises me.

Fast forwad a couple months later, again. Girl in question is having issues with other girl that works with us, and decides to terminate the relationship. We then start hanging out more, and anytime we are hanging out and she has been drinking a bit she admits that she wants to sleep with me and finds me attractive. However, after each time she claims that she does not remember saying the things she said, and always claims that she had blacked out (I even asked her when she was drunk if she remembered the stuff we talked about when she was drunk, and she said yes). After this happening a couple of times, she starts seeing the chic again (not the intern), and moves to a separate city to start going to school (with the chic).

Fast forward a year later. The girl in question breaks up with the chic she moved with, but decides to finish up going to school. During this period of time we start talking more and hanging out a little more when she comes into town. Of course, the entire process starts to happen again, with her becoming a little intoxicated and coming onto me and of course I end up sleeping with her, but she always denies her feelings and whatnot.

I know that this is an extremely long post, but I just wanted to get someone elses' opinion on this entire situation. I'm more than likely crazy for even considering something with this chic, but for some reason we just click when we hang out.

Also, anytime we actually talk about it the next day, or a week after each incident she always claims she doesn't want to risk our friendship, which I believe is just a load of crap.

Any advice would be great!
 

Pimp-sicle

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First thought was damn 8 years being somewhat stuck on this chick?! Damn

Secondly, just focus on showing her a good time and having fun with her. Telling her how you feel about her etc is the girl's job, once you do that you kill the air of mystery, the challenge and become instantly less attractive to the girl.

Complete side note, this chick has some glaring red flags, that you are blindly ignoring and this is obviously just the tip of the iceberg.

We are all guilty of this at one time or another, if a girl comes along when we don't have many options and esp if she's super hot.

The majority of the problems on this main discussion forum arise from guys thinking of a bad prospect as gf material.

I'd suggest detaching from her a bit, so you can get your feelings under control.

Also (I have this problem too), don't drink too much when your around her, otherwise you end up saying too much or doing something you didn't intend to....alcohol is a game buster.

Lastly, realize that this girl is good for 2 things; a fun person to drink with and a place to park your d-hick.....





PIMP
 

New_Age_Prodigy

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Thanks for the reply Pimp.

I think it is more a long the lines of it being convenient, as you mentioned earlier.

I also agree with the challenge aspect as well. Anytime I'm around this chic and I am drinking it is almost like verbal diarrhea; it just pours out. I guess if I am hanging out with her, I need to keep myself in check and not drink so much.

You are also correct about the red flags, there are quite a few with this chic, and to go into it would probably be another topic altogether.

We are okay currently, but I think I am going to distance myself a little bit from her to get my self under control, as you suggested.

Lastly, you are more than likely right with your last statement; probably not relationship material.
 

Sonny Knight

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welcome to the Thark Tank i see a lack morality, discipline and Ethics I'M OUT clean up you're act and come back


I wish you the best of luck
 

New_Age_Prodigy

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Sonny Knight said:
welcome to the Thark Tank i see a lack morality, discipline and Ethics I'M OUT clean up you're act and come back


I wish you the best of luck
Lol. Well thanks Sonny.
 

Sonny Knight

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New_Age_Prodigy said:
Lol. Well thanks Sonny.


on the real be careful STD and AIDS is for real


most of these bi chicks are nasty as fuuck
 

New_Age_Prodigy

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Sonny Knight said:
on the real be careful STD and AIDS is for real


most of these bi chicks are nasty as fuuck
Thanks for looking out, but she isn't nasty at all thank god lol. With that being said, bare backing is something that I rarely do to begin with.
 

whatwg

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Keep doing it, get drunk and sleep with her, but don't talk about it after. Then see other women.
 
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