SexPDX
Master Don Juan
Neg theory and neg "hits" continue to be a widely discussed topic on our forum. Although Sir_Chancealot's Definitive Neg-Hit Post appears to have cleared up the confusion about what is or is not a neg "hit" a least a little, the topic of neg theory and what negging actually is has gone largely (if not completely) undiscussed.
When someone tells us "I used a neg hit on her" what we should then ask is "did you ACTUALLY NEG HER or did you just use a neg hit?" The reason for this question's importance is that using a neg "hit" is not guaranteed to have a neg effect. Let me describe the intended neg effect...
After a remark made by you delivered in the context of a casual conversation where your intent either appeared to make an innocent observation about her or was ambigous with the possibility for it to be interpreted to imply a flaw on her part she becomes self-concious about something that SHE percieves to be a flaw in her. Her self conciousness is just enough for her to subconciously re-evaluate her defensiveness towards you but not so intense that she is either genuinely offended by the remark or she tosses you off as a pathetic choad making frivolous and petty struggle to demonstrate a lack of intimidation of her. Your continued positive conversation with her convinces her that your intent was not to insult or poke fun.
For an example, check out my post on Negging to Disarm.
Negging is NOT something to do after you are already in an interaction with her where you are already positively talking to her in a free flowing conversation. It is something used to induce positive conversation from a position where it either has not happened due to a b*tch shield or her positive conversation with you up until that point is by some external obligation (she is at work for example) and you get a vibe from her that she would be b*tch shielding you otherwise.
Negging (neg hit) is NOT something to be done in reaction to a rejection before you walk off with your tail between your legs as others have wrongfully asserted from time to time. By this you do not impress the woman, nor do you inspire any desire on her part to interact with you any further. In fact such an act most likely cause her to pitty you and think of you as an AFC protecting his ego.
Some newer guys like to use neg hits in such a way that the focus is on how it makes THEM FEEL to have said it rather than how it makes THE WOMAN feel that it was said to her. Keep track of the difference. This is not to say that there is no value to saying negative things to a woman for the purposes of practicing not caring what she or others may think (as in the "prick for a day" exercise) but do not make the mistake of thinking that you are "negging" her by doing this.
Just because a comment was made that could be considered a neg hit does NOT mean that the woman was actually negged.
Nick
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- The seductionist formerly known as trickynick
You either own the game or it owns you.
~"Pon atencion al latido de tu corazon...y el ritmo de tu respiracion...como te permites llegar a ser completamente llevada...por la conexion que esta tomando lugar." ~
[This message has been edited by SexPDX (edited 07-04-2002).]
When someone tells us "I used a neg hit on her" what we should then ask is "did you ACTUALLY NEG HER or did you just use a neg hit?" The reason for this question's importance is that using a neg "hit" is not guaranteed to have a neg effect. Let me describe the intended neg effect...
After a remark made by you delivered in the context of a casual conversation where your intent either appeared to make an innocent observation about her or was ambigous with the possibility for it to be interpreted to imply a flaw on her part she becomes self-concious about something that SHE percieves to be a flaw in her. Her self conciousness is just enough for her to subconciously re-evaluate her defensiveness towards you but not so intense that she is either genuinely offended by the remark or she tosses you off as a pathetic choad making frivolous and petty struggle to demonstrate a lack of intimidation of her. Your continued positive conversation with her convinces her that your intent was not to insult or poke fun.
For an example, check out my post on Negging to Disarm.
Negging is NOT something to do after you are already in an interaction with her where you are already positively talking to her in a free flowing conversation. It is something used to induce positive conversation from a position where it either has not happened due to a b*tch shield or her positive conversation with you up until that point is by some external obligation (she is at work for example) and you get a vibe from her that she would be b*tch shielding you otherwise.
Negging (neg hit) is NOT something to be done in reaction to a rejection before you walk off with your tail between your legs as others have wrongfully asserted from time to time. By this you do not impress the woman, nor do you inspire any desire on her part to interact with you any further. In fact such an act most likely cause her to pitty you and think of you as an AFC protecting his ego.
Some newer guys like to use neg hits in such a way that the focus is on how it makes THEM FEEL to have said it rather than how it makes THE WOMAN feel that it was said to her. Keep track of the difference. This is not to say that there is no value to saying negative things to a woman for the purposes of practicing not caring what she or others may think (as in the "prick for a day" exercise) but do not make the mistake of thinking that you are "negging" her by doing this.
Just because a comment was made that could be considered a neg hit does NOT mean that the woman was actually negged.
Nick
------------------
- The seductionist formerly known as trickynick
You either own the game or it owns you.
~"Pon atencion al latido de tu corazon...y el ritmo de tu respiracion...como te permites llegar a ser completamente llevada...por la conexion que esta tomando lugar." ~
[This message has been edited by SexPDX (edited 07-04-2002).]