The concept of "being the prize"

[Q-Pid]

I see a lot of advice on these forums that suggests men should "be the prize" if they want success with women. And while I understand the logic behind this, wouldn't "being the prize" remove the need of approaching?

A prize would not approach - as a prize is something to be obtained. A man is always the aggressor, and if he wins the game he gets the prize - the women. It always works this way - some folks are better at plaing the game than others - hence "playas" - they can play it well.

A prize would not need to play the game as THEY are the goods. Somethign others pursue. Perhaps "make yourself the prize" is a mentality for those who want women to approach them?

I'm not asking for advice - just unsure "being the prize" is a mentality a man should have. Or that perhaps "prize" is the wrong word to use as it can make RAFC's more passive in approaching women.

Opinions?

-Q

 

[morisson]

i also think its a psychobabble thingy... even if you are tom cruise, girls will never approach you even if they like you. you always have to do the first move even if you are the prize. after all you convey tha you are the prize when you interact with them.

 

[SamePendo]

You have to give women the opportunity to see you are the ****.

You are confusing being the price with being seriously narcicistic.

 

[stalluproar]

The key is sending mixed messages. It may seem you are making her the prize by approaching, but your attitude in the interaction is the opposite than the typical guy who comes up with an insecure attitude. Then accuse her at some point for wanting to go out with you or something similar. That is where the concept of you being the prize works.

 

[backbreaker]

Look, you are right, and wrong at the same tme.



First, being the prize isn't a technique, it sh ould be your state of mind.


If you have to tell yourself you are the prize, then you are not the prize.

When is the last time a good looking girl had to tell herself she was good looking? Exactly.


See, your problem is that you ar p utting a women in a man's shoes, and that's your mistake.


do Women approach men? Yes and no.

Yes they do, but not like you would approach a woman.

A woman will NEVER come up to you and make a casual conversaion, and tell you that you are cute and ask for your phone number.. well, unless she is ugly or a warpig.

Women dont' approach, they MAKE IT KNOWN THAT YOU FIT THEIR STANDARDS.

I don't cold approach... I get "approached" all of the time. That's why it soo important to have real life expericne instead of sitting on this board all damn day.

It's a sad day when I just read a post about a guy being single, and yet he wondered what it ment that a g irl invited him to his house? :crackup:


Women Flirt. Women are masters at making it known, directly or indirectly that they are interested in you, but few, very few will come out and tell you that they want you. It's your job to pick up on thoose clues and move in

 

[Jay-X]

Originally posted by morisson
i also think its a psychobabble thingy... even if you are tom cruise, girls will never approach you even if they like you. you always have to do the first move even if you are the prize. after all you convey tha you are the prize when you interact with them.

i agree with the second concept you express, but i have to say that i get approached really often and i'm far away from being tom cruise

 

[morisson]

Originally posted by Jay-X
i agree with the second concept you express, but i have to say that i get approached really often and i'm far away from being tom cruise

theres exceptions for every rule, afterall i was talking in general

 

[tmpgstx]

You have to put a high price tag value on yourself. You have to place as much or more (preferrably more worth) on yourself as an asset for her than she does for you.

It's all about brand name and image. Make a good 'brand name' for yourself any way that you can. It's working for me (i think anywayz lol).

 

[hck332]

My english is pretty bad, but I'll try to explain how I see the concept of being "the prize".

I'm not a DJ, I rarely approach girls, and when i do that, I dont do that because I want her, just because I think she might be nice and to let her know that I'm also easy going person - so if she likes me it will be easier for her to try to get my attention. When I get those "i like you" signals, I dont ask for her #, I just keep being relaxed and disinteresed in her, so she's comfortable in my company. I just let her go and wait for our next accidental meeting (it's possible for this to happen months later). We chat a little, i'm glad to see her etc. When we meet a few more times and if she still shows signs of interest, I ask for her number to call her some time. We set up a date and the rest is as usual - but I RARELY give her compliments and tease her all the time. I really know what they want (much of that is learned here on this forum - THANK YOU GUYS!)

I dont get much girls this way, but I dont really want that. My life is fulfiled with other things like music, friends, arts etc, so girls are only another thing to enjoy in my free time, rather then an obsession.

So, "being the prize" is not a mindset that I turn on when I'm talking with girls, its what I really think of myself. The key is to have a happy life and a normal family. When you're happy, you don't need girls. They need you.

 

[Jariel]

Originally posted by Q-Unit
A prize would not need to play the game as THEY are the goods. Somethign others pursue. Perhaps "make yourself the prize" is a mentality for those who want women to approach them?

In my opinion you are right. I have embraced the prize mentality and lifestyle (meaning, I am working hard to become the prize not just think it) and yes women do most of the chasing. I'm constantly receiving calls, emails and text messages, requests to hang out or sometimes even being asked on dates by women, but even as the genuine prize male, women won't mob you as soon as you leave the house or drop into your lap out of nowhere. You still need a way of meeting women and letting them see and appreciate your value.

So whether it removes the need for cold approaching all depends on whether you have other ways to meet women. In my own opinion, being the prize entails having a rich and varied social life, in which case yes it does remove the need for approaching.

 

[tmpgstx]

It's just like marketing .. if you can't get mainstream due to whatever bottlenecks there are, is possible to get a niche. It's when you date someone ir-regardless of social identity because both of you come from different circles.

The prize aspect is synomonous with a product whose attributes speaks for itself. It still has to be marketed, just not in a desparate vacum cleaner salesmen type of way.

 

[Maximus_Decimus]

This is a really good question.

As with everything in this forum, tips, rules, etc, don't take everything literally and don't make a rule absolute. Anyways, this excerpt I read from ijjjji explains it best:

Originally posted by ijjjji

(Being the prize) is about displaying that you care more about yourself than you care about the girl. It is a frame - a way of seeing reality.

http://www.fastseduction.com/cgi-bin/search.cgi?action=retrieve&grp=6&mn=1080726672141196


If she gives you sh*t, and you take her sh*t, then you must be sh*t.

Don't take the prize mentality to the absolute though. At the end of the day, masculine actions get you laid. In general, it is the man that approaches, it is the man that goes for the kiss, and it is the man that escalates.

Originally posted by Franco

Anyway at the end masculine aggressivity will have to show its role otherwise no lays at all.

http://www.fastseduction.com/cgi-bin/search.cgi?action=retrieve&grp=6&mn=1076493212130720

Maximus_Decimus

 

[Permission]

Good reply, Maximus

 

[Rocker]

It's true about mixed signals... The girls who always seem to be chasing you are the ones that say stuff like "I don't know how to act around you... I don't know what you're feeling".