The case for admitting cheating

[Divorced w 3]

I’m wondering if in the context of a relationship that has gone astray, mostly in the area of disrespect and the relationship has gone amuck, where it was otherwise good in general but things got so out of hand that nobody can point to who did what first, nor should they probably try… I’m curious if a simple admission of cheating or even a bluff of having done so, may be a catalyst that rights the ship. Discuss.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

I’m curious if a simple admission of cheating or even a bluff of having done so, may be a catalyst that rights the ship. Discuss.

I doubt it.

 

[Solomon]

I can't speak for anyone else, when I was 25 I cheated on a girl, there was no sex involved but a sexual act long story short I felt like shyt it went against my morals and character. As soon as it happened I called my girlfriend at the time to confess she came over grabbed her stuff and never spoke with me again

Let me just say the girl never disrespected me even to this day she is the best girlfriend that I ever had, so why did I cheat? no excuses I was a scumbag. What would I do if there was disrespect I would have a conversation about it, if that doesn't work than I would walk away if we are married I would seek a counselor or threapist

 

[Chow Mein]

You never cheat.
As a man, you break things off and start anew. If you can’t handle that, you’re just a simp without balls.

 

[Gamisch]

This is a typical GIGS idea.

We all hear that women "love" cheaters, beaters, jail birds ect. So men start to wonder if they would get more respect from women by doing so.

Countless YouTube videos say: she won't mind you cheating as long as you don't love those other women ". What they fail to mention is the level of toxicity that comes with living such a life. And how toxic that woman must be to "accept" that deal.

 

[Westminster]

If you cheat, keep it to yourself, otherwise you're asking for trouble. But then it's best to tell a woman as little as you can get away with about anything. Let her do the talking.

 

[Clockwerk50]

My mom once told me that, when we were discussing something in regards to cheating, “a un hombre se le perdona todo, a una mujer no,” which means “a man is forgiven for everything, but a woman is not.” Granted, she was a woman who, while taking care of me, would get all dressed up, wear heels, and put on perfume just for my dad when he came home from his weekly business trips. It was a different generation.

With this in mind, I would keep this information to myself, especially in today's age where you’d be compared to everyone else's ideal partner. Given the emotional immaturity and unrealistic expectations often seen online, where everyone is judged for not being perfect, you’d likely face harsh criticism. This might also influence the decisions of the person who has been cheated on.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Huh?

Just walk away. Why do you seem to love toxicity so much? This is a theme with most of these women you are with...

If this is about you and not a generalized question...

 

[CornbreadFed]

I cheated on my previous girlfriend pretty brutally and repeatedly, but the relationship was pretty rocky from the start, and it was a terrible point in my life mentally. I never told her about it until like a few months after we broke up and she tried to make a hail mary attempt to restart the relationship by showing up at my apartment and trying to suckceed me back in. After that experience, I will never cheat like that on a partner like that again because it was pretty weak minded of me to do so. The only thing I can't fully stand on is if some hot girl just threw a slow soft ball pitch at me and I knew it was a one-time thing. I do my best to avoid situations that might put me in that scenario lol.

 

[The Duke]

I have three friends that cheated in their marriages. They are all still married. Their wives still struggle with the fact their men cheated. It has resulted in less sex for all of them. All of them have said it decreased the romance and they seem more like friends than lovers now.

I've never cheated. I'd rather tell her to hit the road and find me a replacement than expose myself to that drama.

My ex-wife however did cheat on me. Once a woman does, I'm never going back to what once was.

 

[plumber]

interesting question.

its not the cheating that increases the attraction, its the available options.

make it obvious that you can cheat anytime you like, the options are visible. but don't do it; your respect from women and men will increase. you are choosing to be a man of integrity and high value. really uncommon type man.

to make it work, the options need to be visible, real and high value.

it has to be clear that you CAN but that you choose not.

 

[Pandora]

I honestly dont know how you guys can go decades and be sexually faithful to one woman. I do admire the men that do it. It is a lofty ideal to strive for I guess.

I dont know if it is natural.

 

[Pandora]

My mom once told me that, when we were discussing something in regards to cheating, “a un hombre se le perdona todo, a una mujer no,” which means “a man is forgiven for everything, but a woman is not.” Granted, she was a woman who, while taking care of me, would get all dressed up, wear heels, and put on perfume just for my dad when he came home from his weekly business trips. It was a different generation.

With this in mind, I would keep this information to myself, especially in today's age where you’d be compared to everyone else's ideal partner. Given the emotional immaturity and unrealistic expectations often seen online, where everyone is judged for not being perfect, you’d likely face harsh criticism. This might also influence the decisions of the person who has been cheated on.

So more traditional cultures accept that men will be men. I think this is what your mom was trying to communicate.

Its unreasonable to expect a man to be provider, protector, emotional rock and keep his peniz in check for 40yrs. Thats a perfect human.

I believe that as long as a man is taking good care of his wife financially and emotionally...then let him get a handjob at the local rub and tug every now and then.

Idk maybe im messed up.