the break

[tosh]

I'd wait till you also get the opinion of those that have invested more thought/time into your thread but in my opinion...

...this should not change how you act at all. All it should do is cement your belief that this girl is not worth your time. Move on with your life and don't give her the satisfaction of seeing you react emotionally to her new interest.

Time for a new chapter for you.

 

[V2Logger]

I would lay low for now, way low, you be gone, out of sight.

You had trust in this girl. It is now gone, accept the loss. You cannot trust her. So you cannot be serious with her. You have other options out there, just make sure you know you cannot trust her now, she has shown treason towards what you both had. Better it happen now, than more time invested in this. Think of the point you are at now, but 5yrs later. Worse, what if you had tied the knot.

Move on and move forward for yourself. Time for NC to begin. Save your dignity and learn to walk away from this one. There are greater things in life.

 

[AMDG]

She was comparing another option

Even without options some girls will walk away because of the "princess" mentality. With options the process becomes a balancing act between various men for various needs. Again, cut contact and save what little dignity you have left.

 

[Candela]

i didnt see i that my previous post actually got posted - this is the same story as written above:

so you guys were right... there was another guy... i sort of suspected this one guy who was her friend, and they have lots in common, more than we did really. I found out for sure on my own, yesterday (not by spying or nothing, lol). Anyways i'm actually a little bit relieved bc i couldn't figure out if i had done something wrong, or what i had done... but anyways, i've tried to at least be on good terms with her until now, albeit little communication.

Now that i know - and she doesn't know i know - should i totally cut off all communication, i.e. defriend her on facebook and never talk to her again? Or should i just act cool and not even ever let her know i care... She strung me along for a while and was real manipulative, while i just tried to stay cool... she even was still telling my sister the other day how confused she still was, while actually she's havin fun hanging out with a new romantic interest. I really dislike her now, and in a way i want to show her i don't even ever want to be friends or maintain any contact. On the other hand, she could do it to me at some point - delete all our pics and flaunt a new relationship status. I learned my lesson the hard way, but i am definitely more knowledgeable now. By defriending her can i show that im done with her once and for all, or is this just showing that i'm hurt or something? The b*tch is having a ball telling all her girlfriends the exciting news.

 

[FreD_BeaR]

You don't need to 'befriend' her. You need to act like your mature self and just not care about it. Start the NC, don't talk to her. It was something that you did that made her rethink things and go to another guy, so theres nothing really relieving about it. But it dosnt matter now, its over and done with. All you can do is live and learn. Just move on, and forget about her. You don't have to be an a$$hole, and shouldn't be, otherwise that'll show you are weak and that it bothers and and that you care. And you lose your dignity. Just be cool and get new prospects.

 

[AMDG]

I really dislike her now.

Ignore her - that includes the facebook. If you take action she will notice that you are hurt, if you don't change anything and at the same time you cut contact she will be clueless. Cut contact works

 

[Candela]

Here's an update:

i haven't heard from my ex, but we live in a small college town and it's very likely i'll run into her sometime soon on campus or in the small downtown area at night... what do i do if i run into her, or even worse, her and the guy she left me for?? A polite "hi" from a distance or what? Totally ignoring them might show that i am hurt, but i don't want to be akwardly nice either or act like a wuss seeing them together for the first time. It's likely i'll see her at this meeting i have to go to next week, in a small room... Remember, i'm doing NC because she basically left me for another guy (that i know thru her)... how do i handle any akward run-ins with her/them?? we only broke up two weeks ago, so it's fresh still.

 

[V2Logger]

I would just say a simple "what's up" and that's all. That would be if eye contact is made. No need to be cruel or rude, show maturity. In doing just that, you don't leave a door open and don't show any bitterness. It should be more like an old friend salutation. That's it, just plain and simple, black and white. Don't give them anything to talk about.