Great topic, listening to people can really develop rapport. Although listening to girls is important too, it would be beneficial to you to use your wit and tease her every once in a while -- you know, keep the aura a bit flirty and sexual. I was talking to this girl today, and she said that women make a definite line between friend material and boyfriend material. If all you do is listen to her problems, you're going to get stuck into friend material for sure.
The best way to attract ANYONE
- Thread starter thefonz
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chicmagnet
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Well, I was like that. Giving people a lot of importance, being nice to them, smiling etc. But it didn't seem to work. Actually, people started to believe that they could get away with a lot of things with me. Now, I'm more self focused. But that doesn't seem to be working either. Any idea where I'm going wrong.
insanity
Master Don Juan
i'd say it all has to do with what your doing. if it's a new job, nobodies really going to be that receptive to you, if your the new guy. usually you have to prove yourself or wait till a friday, because thats when people seem to be in a better mood.
i find alot of times if you have a friend with you, people seem to be more at ease to chat with a few people then just one on one. or if your lucky and you meet an old aquiantance they usually put a good word in for you and the doors are more open.
and the basics, it's all about common interests. if somebody talks about cars all the time and you have no interest in that stuff, chances are a friendship isn't going to really develope.
i find alot of times if you have a friend with you, people seem to be more at ease to chat with a few people then just one on one. or if your lucky and you meet an old aquiantance they usually put a good word in for you and the doors are more open.
and the basics, it's all about common interests. if somebody talks about cars all the time and you have no interest in that stuff, chances are a friendship isn't going to really develope.
this tip is really good, almost too powerful; but as you use it everyday with every person, well for me, i found that most ppl are very boring. and repeat the same thing another person said. the persons i was conversing with enjoyed this tremendously and i could ussually become very good friends with the person.
and then i went through a point in life of social withdrawal; thinking "what's the use of keeping your friends", you could just as easily make another friend as you can lose them.
and now i realized that everybody is different and you shouldnt treat everybody as a generic person. (ie, instead of asking interview questions like what school you go to, what is your fav. sport, ask them what they strive for in life and what would they do if they were president for a day)
and then i went through a point in life of social withdrawal; thinking "what's the use of keeping your friends", you could just as easily make another friend as you can lose them.
and now i realized that everybody is different and you shouldnt treat everybody as a generic person. (ie, instead of asking interview questions like what school you go to, what is your fav. sport, ask them what they strive for in life and what would they do if they were president for a day)
thefonz
Master Don Juan
Ya, this usually happens to me when I spend too much time focusing on ONE area of my life. You use the concept of "listen to everyone" to DEATH and then disown it because it dosn't work anymore. I think it's far more important to embrace the random than run scripts in your daily life, I'd store this tip in my vault and bring it out when I feel things could be going better. You can't be everything to everyone, you have to focus on yourself sometimes, and others other times.Goku said:
