TheException said:
Attention
Definition: "notice taken of someone or something; the regarding of someone or something as interesting or important."
Gentlemen...I present to you....one of the biggest weapons in your arsenal, and if its not in your arsenal...its time to put it in. A MAN'S ATTENTION. "A man's attention" is one of the most sought after things in the world. By women....by friends....even by other men(think of your employees if you are the boss). Attention is almost an abstract concept because you dont really get to experience someone else's TRUE attention. Think about it.....you are telling a story to a woman....but is she really listening? You are proposing a new idea at work to several co-workers....but are they really listening? It may appear the people in the example are "all ears" but Im sure many of us hear have "faked" giving our attention to someone, when we were actually bored to death. But on the contrary.....its almost 100% noticeable when you DO NOT have the attention of someone...and it is this aspect of "attention" that I wish to discuss.
How does it feel to be ignored? You may be talking to someone, yet they are more caught up in their phone and not really paying attention to you? Not great right? It is THIS feeling....that you should add to your arsenal and pull out when applicable. Lets get into the good stuff...
Anyone that has been in a LTR can tell you....the optimal behavior of your girlfriend....was experienced BEFORE YOU ACTUALLY STARTED DATING. Before becoming exclusive women are on their "best behavior" because they seek his attention. They have sex every time he wants it, and she rarely picks fights. When you become "official" it is IMPERATIVE to use your attention to reinforce her behavior and keep it right where it is. A popular school of thought is to call out a woman on all her sh1tty behavior. Now I do agree....calling a woman out has its role....but its massively overplayed and the result is usually not beneficial. A woman should definitely be "afraid" when you do decide to actually call her out, so when you do so often over every little thing....you literally DESENSITIZE her to you "anger". Over time...you start looking like a 5 yr old who gets mad and throws things when you dont get your way. A better way to handle her bratty behavior...is to withdraw your attention. And no...its not in a "p1ssed off" tone or trying to "OVERTLY DISPLAY" your disapproval...it should come off like the definition states above....you should regard her behavior as "uninteresting" thus....you give it....zero attention. A woman will feel that...and reciprocate by cleaning up her b1tchy attitude. Think im blowing this out of proportion? Next time you are in bed fighting or arguing....roll over on her very covertly and turn on the tv as if you no longer find her interesting....wait until you see and feel how she reacts to that.
Ill wrap this up with a real life example. My girlfriend and I were meeting some of her friends at one of their houses. The area in which she lived was retarded and the parking was atrocious. It was street parking in a heavily populated and commercial area. So my girlfriend wanted me to park at this open spot....right in front of a fire hydrant. I had no plans on receiving a fine or having my car towed so my search for a parking spot went on. She grew very p1ssed and annoyed because we were now late for the dinner party. She was irritated and blurted out "that we would have parked by now, and that I dont listen to her". I find a spot and we begin walking to the house which is a few blocks away and she is extremely b1tchy at this point saying annoying things like "oh great now we are like 10 blocks away" and general bratty things like this. Most guys have a tendency to want to tell her to shut the fvck up and yell. Me? I didnt say a fvckin word the WHOLE WALK. I let her run that bratty mouth. Once at the party I said hi to everyone and engaged in conversation and practically ignored her the entire time. It wasnt a hateful thing...or a "im mad at you so im going to ignore you" thing. I just had very little interest in dealing with her in that state....thats honest. Fastforward to the walk back to the car....and she states "im sorry I was being rude earlier...I just didnt want to be late". I respond with a very sincere "no big deal."
So you see....speak to the woman in a language she can easily understand. And you have to MEAN IT. You cant be doing it just because you want to send her a message or something gay like that. Just find bratty behavior "uninteresting" and respond accordingly. As in all things...fake it at first if you have to. But just understand the mindset that you want to get to eventually....being at a place of pure indifference.
Use it or lose it.
I do have to say, my ex was on optimal behavior (by your definition) for about a year and a few months, and we lived together also. I also didn't encounter any bratty behavior until about 1 or 2 months before she left. The only times she would behave poorly was when I wanted to waste money on beer or weed or cigs that we couldn't afford. I was by far the more selfish one.
Its not that hard to keep a woman behaving how you want. Of course she was an international Chinese student, but had been here 2 years before we dated.
All you have to do is literally just be not very interested in her, and it will show. This will make her try, and try, and try to please you, and fight for your love again. That's what I did, but I was seriously just bored of her, and slightly annoyed by her presence. Can't have your cake and eat it to.
