The annoying guy

[DJinTraining06]

You know what really annoys me. When your out in a group of people and theres that one a$$hole guy who has to contradict everything you say. And he'll say somethin very insulting or degrading, and when you react to it)even calmly) he totally embarasses you by saying - calm down dude, its a joke!

I cannot stand these guys. Even if you react really calmly and just try to defend yourself without losing your cool, they still make u look bad in front of the rest of the group by saying - "its a joke" "chill" or something like that and they have that sarcastic tone and smirk on their face.

Its like sometimes u wont even be insulted, your just answering the guy. And he'll still say - "im jokin". And u basically cant win after that, cuz if answer back and say that you know he was joking or that u that werent even offended in the first place, you just end up sounding like he got the better of u, because your still talkin about it.

Anybody know how to deal with these guys? Beat them at their own game maybe? or diffuse them some how. I dunno if im explaining it right but i think i got the gist of it above.

 

[Vypros]

You deal with these guys by ignoring them.

You don't have to "defend" yourself. Odds are, other people in the group are thinking the same thing as you.

If he contradicts you, just look at him, pause for a moment and hold eye contact, and then look away and by like "Annnnnyway...." and change the subject or go about as if he didn't say anything.

 

[DJinTraining06]

You deal with these guys by ignoring them.

You don't have to "defend" yourself. Odds are, other people in the group are thinking the same thing as you.

If he contradicts you, just look at him, pause for a moment and hold eye contact, and then look away and by like "Annnnnyway...." and change the subject or go about as if he didn't say anything.

Yea u got a point, if u dont react to them, theyll stop right? The only thing is, then u seem like a pushover. And sometimes theres another person in a group, that will sat "your gonna let him say that?" or somethin like that, and then you look like a punk for not defending yourself. Although, if the group sucks this much maybe their not worth hanging out with in the first place lol

 

[BBX]

I know exactly what your talking about. You perfectly described someone I know that is exactly like this. Just be around these types of people as little as possible, they are pretty much rejects in life. They feel like they need to put everyone down in order to gain popularity, but they are in reality only getting the recognition of being "annoying", not cool by any means. They can't make real connections with people, and can't make close friends. Just a ton of aquentiences. You are the better man than guys like this, just keep your cool and stay awaay from people like this as much as possible.

 

[speed dawg]

Yep I know alot of these guys. Most of them are tools that think they're cool by "messing" with you, when they are the ones that look like damm fools. My boss used to do this, so I had to put up with it. I had a couple of friends who tried to do it too.

Best is like vypros said. Ignore them or change the subject. Some people are just smoother talkers, so going head to head with them gives them power. Ignoring is the ultimate put-down. Indifference is alot better revenge than trying to fight back.

 

[DJinTraining06]

I know exactly what your talking about. You perfectly described someone I know that is exactly like this. Just be around these types of people as little as possible, they are pretty much rejects in life. They feel like they need to put everyone down in order to gain popularity, but they are in reality only getting the recognition of being "annoying", not cool by any means. They can't make real connections with people, and can't make close friends. Just a ton of aquentiences. You are the better man than guys like this, just keep your cool and stay awaay from people like this as much as possible.

Yea exactly, you hit the nail on the head about how they dont have real connections. They seem all popular cuz they know so many people, but at the end of the day they dont have many true friends.

 

[BBX]

yep yep

 

[DJinTraining06]

Yep I know alot of these guys. Most of them are tools that think they're cool by "messing" with you, when they are the ones that look like damm fools. My boss used to do this, so I had to put up with it. I had a couple of friends who tried to do it too.

Best is like vypros said. Ignore them or change the subject. Some people are just smoother talkers, so going head to head with them gives them power. Ignoring is the ultimate put-down. Indifference is alot better revenge than trying to fight back.

yea prob the best advice. Funny i had a boss like that too last year. he liked to mess with me cuz i was the youngest there and i was quiet. I used to fuel him cuz i kept gettin annoyed. Or i'd laugh it off, which also turned out to be a mistake cuz he thought it was ok to do then. I think just flat out ignoring is the best solution right?

 

[SharinganUser]

Pull a dennis rodman, Box them out.

 

[Jackman]

I've dealt with this kind of guy before.

Next time this guy does this, you look him straight in the eye without saying one word. You want to have this look on your face where you're slightly confused yet humored by what he said, as if you're thinking about saying something but you're not quite sure what yet. Let that silence get uncomfortable. Push it there and hold it. NEVER say a word. If he says nothing, turn to the rest of the group with a grin and carry on your conversation like it never happened. If he says something, turn to the rest of the group with a grin and carry on your conversation like it never happened.

If he does it again, you do the same thing, only this time you don't have to draw it out. Three seconds. Real quick. Give him the same look and immediately go right back to conversation.

There is no defense for this. If he doesn't say anything, he's a b1tch. If he says something, he's the one being defensive. The only thing he can do is stop, or keep going. If he keeps going, you throw the same "chill" sh!t back at him.

 

[CalmCoolAndConfident]

When he does that, just say "dont talk to me" calmly, then completely ignore him, lol he will feel stupid and the rest of the group will see you as the bigger person. Or give him a the same look that you would make if you just stepped in a peice of dog ****.

 

[Vypros]

Yea u got a point, if u dont react to them, theyll stop right? The only thing is, then u seem like a pushover. And sometimes theres another person in a group, that will sat "your gonna let him say that?" or somethin like that, and then you look like a punk for not defending yourself. Although, if the group sucks this much maybe their not worth hanging out with in the first place lol

No, it doesn't make you a pushover at all. In fact, it makes you SECURE with yourself.

You don't have to defend yourself over every little detail. You don't have to lash back EVERY time someone disrespects you.

They say it takes a bigger man to walk away from a fight than it does to stand there and fight.

I say, it takes a bigger man to know WHEN he should fight and when he should walk away.

A guy contradicting something you say is NOT worth an arguement, unless you are in court or you are on a debate team or something.

In a group of friends, everyone is entitled to their own opinion. And if you got that annoying guy in your group and you ignore him and don't let him rattle you (which is what he is trying to do) you show yourself to be extremely secure in what you say and believe.

 

[DJinTraining06]

No, it doesn't make you a pushover at all. In fact, it makes you SECURE with yourself.

You don't have to defend yourself over every little detail. You don't have to lash back EVERY time someone disrespects you.

They say it takes a bigger man to walk away from a fight than it does to stand there and fight.

I say, it takes a bigger man to know WHEN he should fight and when he should walk away.

A guy contradicting something you say is NOT worth an arguement, unless you are in court or you are on a debate team or something.

In a group of friends, everyone is entitled to their own opinion. And if you got that annoying guy in your group and you ignore him and don't let him rattle you (which is what he is trying to do) you show yourself to be extremely secure in what you say and believe.

That makes sense. The only thing is it doesnt always work like that. Cuz there are dumb people out there who dont see ignoring as being secure, but more u taking sh*t and being a pushover. Like i remember in high school i worked at a supermarket, and there was this one ballbuster kid that nobody liked. He used to get under everyones skin even the managers. Hed say really offensive stuff to everone. He was doin it with me for a while and id do the whole ignroing thing, and it made him look bad. But then there was this one kid who was not too bright, he was a steroid using bodybuilder guy, such a moron. And he would say to me "he's younger than u (i was 2 years older) why do u let him pick on u?" And id be like dude hes not physically picking on me, hes saying idiotic things which do not even bother me cuz hes a retard. But this kid insisted a couple times and said it really loud for everyone to hear - "why do u let him pick on u!" so it made me look bad, when meanwhile, nothing he was doin to me was anything that required defensive action in my opinion. I usually am very defensive, and this time i decided to just ignore the idiot. And it was working till that meathead said that to me. Some other kid ended up punchign that kid in the face, a sucker punch, and a cop happened to be outside in the parking lot of our store and he almost got in a lot of trouble. Well his method worked, the guy never picked on him again but i dunno, i think he lost his cool. He could have lost his job over this kid. I dunno this stuff can be very tricky.

Some pests only respond to violence. Its hard to tell wat the right thing to do is. cuz everone is different. Some people will see u as more confident for not defending urself. Others will see u as a pushover. You almost cant win.

 

[Vypros]

Some people will see u as more confident for not defending urself. Others will see u as a pushover. You almost cant win.

That, my friend, is the secret.

You're not going to be able to make EVERYONE like you or see you as confident, and you don't have to have everyone see you that way.

The important thing is that you know what you are willing to fight for, and what you are not willing to fight for, and then STICK TO IT. To hell with what people think of you man.

But only you can know what is worth it and what isn't. Idea is that you don't let people rattle you. There are times when you need to tell people to shut up and times when you yourself need to keep your mouth shut.

And when that time comes, YOU decide. Know what I mean?

 

[penkitten]

i never liked those jerks either.
i say ignore them and it will make you look like the better guy .

 

[blueguy]

It's funny. The guy thinks he's cool. Laugh at him. Tell him he's a funny guy. Look at the others while you laugh at how stupid he's acting. If you can catch on to his game, the others probably can too. That puts him back into his position.