The AFC does a 180 and becomes a jerk

Darth

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How many of us, after reading the DJ Bible, became complete jerks for about a year before realizing our mistake in going to the opposite spectrum?

I remember reading the DJ Bible and going on this site at the end of grade 9, after losing a girl I really liked. I was a effeminate, needy "nice guy."

The following year, grade 10, I just went completely overboard, did a 180, and acted like a complete jerk, irritating and hurting a lot of people's feelings. Over the last couple years, I've discovered true masculinity without having to put on a different front.

Did this happen to anyone else? Why do you think this happens?
 

trd323

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Sup bro,

Same thing happened to me. Not only did I go on this site, but was a member of every pick-up guru's forums (mehow,mystery,style,DYD,juggler,swingcat,etc) Then I realized what a true masculine person acts. Also, realized that being your true self is the best self you can be.
 

KontrollerX

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It happens because its natural.

You get burnt and you go into payback mode.

Though it should be noted when most of us older DJ's talk about being jerks we just mean being unreliable, c0cky and funny, shallow and cool with no intentions of giving a girl a relationship.
 

apusislaya

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It happened to me when I discovered PUA material two years ago. Turns out I needed to become a man, but I had no idea what that meant, even after reading a lot of pickup materials, including DJ Bible.


Turns out the secret of attracting chicks is being a man, just like a secret of attracting men (for women) is being a woman, a beautiful woman with perfect everything, not only body.


Perhaps a disclaimer warning "this manual does not give you an idea how to be a man" is in order? Or one urging all students to find a true man role model? Because if you have a role model you have a map of what to become.
 

Canadian Catnip

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Darth said:
How many of us, after reading the DJ Bible, became complete jerks for about a year before realizing our mistake in going to the opposite spectrum?
The same thing happened to me as well.

I thought I had to be a jerk to women. It was hard to do, I never felt right doing it. I never felt like it was the real me.

After a while I learned, thank god, that it was not what I was supposed to do. I have mellowed into the wonderful, strong masculine man I am now through trial and error.

This is the place I have always wanted to be at. Funny thing, I don't desire women as a fix for my life at all.

I have a friend who I introduced to PU materials about 2 years ago, he is now in the jerk phase and sometimes I think he looks at me as if I'm too weak to be a jerk. Whenever we go out he negs the women and I just smile and chat with them. I know he will eventually come around.
 

Mavrick

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Being a DJ is not about putting others down to make yourself a bigger person. Not even close.

Being a DJ is not about smooth one liners or put downs. It's about being confident in yourself and believing you are a competent person in your pursuit of your own happiness.

It's about unplugging yourself from the matrix that asks that you beg a woman to be yours.

You don't have to beg any woman for anything because you don't need her, and you start to realize that it's ok not to call all the time, and it's ok to miss her call because she's not going to be mad, she's going to be more intrigued.

It's not about being a complete ass where you call her names and beat her, but showing her that you are completely independent. You can live without her and be alone. She's just someone there to add to the happiness you've already found in your own life. She's not your world, she's just a part of it.
 
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I still am a jerk. Who the fvck cares?
 

Faded Image

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Yep, I went through that faze when I was first introduced into the pickup world. Granted I stayed on the David D's emails and the Sosuave commercial page for a year and a half before even thinking about coming over her

I was Super nice guy turned "Super Wanna Be Jerk" within a months time thinking that being a jerk will lead to instant success. I saw success sometimes, other times I just "Jerked" myself out of a piece of pvssy.

I continued my jerk ways but toned it down a little then noticed that my success began increasing once I started understanding how to be a jerk and make it work for you.

When you've been doing it for more than five years you find your happy medium because you understand the process and everything comes natural to you.
 

Charlie Gordon

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trd323 said:
Not only did I go on this site, but was a member of every pick-up guru's forums (mehow,mystery,style,DYD,juggler,swingcat,etc)
Wow, they're gonna need 12 step programs for this pretty soon.

Seriously, I got into this stuff way over my head. I sometimes wonder if I would have had more success without this material but I realize that success is subjective and I'm not even sure if I would measure it in quality of relationships, number of partners, stories to tell, etc. What's past has passed. But I can think of at least five or six times in my life when I could have gotten with a really attractive woman and absolutely destroyed my chances by trying to be apathetic, mysterious, facetious.... essentially going with anything other than what my intuition was screaming at me.

Nothing beats having an attractive personality and air tight intuition. I'm not sure what someone can do for their personality but it's possible to manipulate an environment so that the most socially advantageous traits outshine the less desirable traits (aka major lifestyle changes). Intuition can only be garnered through experience.

That means if you are lonely, then get off the computer and leave the house! Be a nice guy, be a jerk, be masculine, be a player, use Mystery Method, use your own shtt. It doesn't matter. There will be trial and error and you will learn... but if you're not actually out there trying, then you can expect this stuff to mess with your mind. It's almost too powerful reading this stuff or following the community if you're not an active participant. Newcomers don't understand this and end up trying to behave like someone they're not.
 

toddlips

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You got burned too many times to keep up the "nice guy" persona, it's perfectly natural. I respect the fact that you stopped trying and are now keeping it real. Keep it up.
 

Caferacer

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leftForDeadPhoenix said:
I still am a jerk. Who the fvck cares?
yup, same here.

When I got on this site I became an *******, simply because it was fun, and it worked. I was 16 at the time, and boy do HS girls love *******s. First time in a while I was actually happy since a crash and burn long term relationship was the reason I came here.

Plus, when you get some success and learn how easy it is to meet girls when you are young it's easy to get that way.

College knocked me back a step and I've found that happy medium.

If you truly get to a don't care attitude then you will come off as a jerk to some people. A lot of people actually. But then again 99% of the populations opinion comes with a grain of salt, so who really cares?
 
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