Texting durring conversation

[Atom Smasher]

I'll be doing it with a new girl this coming Saturday, boys. I'll let you know the result.

 

[Atom Smasher]

OK, guys, I did it as planned today. Met the girl (who, by the way, looked like a 6 or 7 in her pics but was SMOKIN hot and thinner in-person), pulled out the phone, gave her my speech, and she said she really liked that I did that, that today people can't be present with each other and blah, blah, blah...

Works like a charm. It's an easy way to establish dominance and get some compliance, and also present yourself as someone who is sensitive to others.

How often does a girl actually look massively better in-person than in her profile pics? I was prepared for disappointment, but I got the shock of my life when I saw her.

 

[Kenny Powers]

Hmmm I had my doubts but now im definitely going to try that sometime. Hahaha girls looking better in person actually happens to me a lot. This one girl I know looks beat in all her facebook pics, but is like a 7 in person. Its probably the combination of bad lighting, crappy cameras and low quality photos.

Now on to the real reason I'm responding. I hate when girls text while talking to you, but I've found its pretty easy to make fun of them for it and can be used to make you seem dominant. But what do you a girl starts talking (like more than hey hows it going) to someone else, especially a guy (happens a lot when I'm at a crowded party). If its a girl i barely know or with low interest level I usually just walk away. If im pretty sure she'll get back to me in a minute or so I'll stick around but im never sure what to do. Sometimes I check my phone (hahaha lame i know) or just wait and try to look like I'm having a good time and not jealous. I feel like getting involved in the conversation if it's with a guy can make it look like i feel threatened. What do you guys do in these situations?

Last night some girl I'm really close to getting with and who I've been a total DJ around since I've met her (first time thats happened hahaha) did this twice with guys she knew who were walking by. One time she actually asked for the guy's number. I had just been sitting there ignoring them up until then and was like WTF!!!! Luckily the guy apologized for butting in and the girl explained he was gay. This was confirmed when I saw him grinding up on a guy later that night hahaha.

 

[iliketennis]

i agree that it's good to set boundaries and punish rude behavior.. but taking a girl's phone or telling her she has to turn it off seems a bit overbearing to me

ideally her phone will buzz or whatever and she'll ignore it. that's when you're in the best position

 

[Atom Smasher]

Hmmm I had my doubts but now im definitely going to try that sometime. Hahaha girls looking better in person actually happens to me a lot. This one girl I know looks beat in all her facebook pics, but is like a 7 in person. Its probably the combination of bad lighting, crappy cameras and low quality photos.

Now on to the real reason I'm responding. I hate when girls text while talking to you, but I've found its pretty easy to make fun of them for it and can be used to make you seem dominant. But what do you a girl starts talking (like more than hey hows it going) to someone else, especially a guy (happens a lot when I'm at a crowded party). If its a girl i barely know or with low interest level I usually just walk away. If im pretty sure she'll get back to me in a minute or so I'll stick around but im never sure what to do. Sometimes I check my phone (hahaha lame i know) or just wait and try to look like I'm having a good time and not jealous. I feel like getting involved in the conversation if it's with a guy can make it look like i feel threatened. What do you guys do in these situations?

Last night some girl I'm really close to getting with and who I've been a total DJ around since I've met her (first time thats happened hahaha) did this twice with guys she knew who were walking by. One time she actually asked for the guy's number. I had just been sitting there ignoring them up until then and was like WTF!!!! Luckily the guy apologized for butting in and the girl explained he was gay. This was confirmed when I saw him grinding up on a guy later that night hahaha.

This is the first time for me that a woman actually looked better than her pictures. She had even texted me a few pictures in prior weeks, and I was becoming increasingly disappointed with her looks. When I met her, I could barely believe it was her. She was so much thinner and just generally prettier. It was very weird, but I played it cool and later busted on her for having so many pictures of herself in her phone, and telling her that good looks are common and very unimpressive because of the commonality. I look at the inside, blah bla blah...

Regarding the situation you describe, when a girl starts engaging with a guy I will put one hand on each of their shoulders and say something like, "It looks like you two have a lot to talk about. I'll let you catch up" and then I'll walk away. This will fluster the girl and suddenly she will find herself stuck in a conversation with this guy, and she will keep on looking over to wherever you are. She'll be glad to get out of there and rejoin you as fast as she can. If she does this excessively I will sometimes keep my back to her for a while even when she rejoins me. They have to be conditioned to treat you respectfully.

Some will say, "But why play these games?" Unfortunately, the necessity of the games is there, like it or not. We don't have any choice in the matter. Play the game or watch her chew you up and spit you out. It's very sad, but true. Since the game is our reality, we need to bend perception so that they're playing by our rules, and not vice versa.

 

[Atom Smasher]

i agree that it's good to set boundaries and punish rude behavior.. but taking a girl's phone or telling her she has to turn it off seems a bit overbearing to me

ideally her phone will buzz or whatever and she'll ignore it. that's when you're in the best position

You're missing the nuance of this.

You aren't telling her to turn it off. You are demonstrating that you are a man of respect and integrity by turning yours off, and then challenging her, asking her if she can do the same. The implication is that if she doesn't, she has less class than you. I have a 100% success rate with this.

Ideally, we men wouldn't need this forum to learn how to deal with women. Ideally, we could just simply be nice, respectful people with women and not worry about manipulating the dynamics. But we can't. The game dictates that we play the game or lose. I'm trying to learn to play to win because I can't escape the game.

 

[FastMen]

We've all been there, your talking and bullshi*ing and then all of a sudden shes gets a text, then while shes texting it feels like and hour..Ive said before you know its rude to text while your talking to someone...Honestly it ****i*n pisses me off at times. What do you guys do in that situation?

i been there too, its bad , i feel bad too, if its 1 text is ok but then suddenly she texts 3 or 4 or 5 times thats crap, i think you tell her or just say bye bye

 

[soxfan52]

Don't they just call you a control freak then?

 

[Bratt2230]

..

I HATE when people text while i am talking.

I simple just tell it to them, that either they stop texting all the time, or else i am leaving.

I simply CANNOT respect people that do that, especially girls..

edit; Ofc. if it is one text messege or 2 only, then alright, i can understand, but if it is more and all the time... I get so FURIOUS, but in a kind way say, either it is the phone or me 8D

 

[dry]

haha one of the reasons why i love living in brazil...NOone TexTs here!!:cheer:

 

[Atom Smasher]

Don't they just call you a control freak then?

Remember in the Great Pumpkin when Sally looks at Linus and the little hearts flutter out of her head? That's the look I get.

Women today are starving for a real man who leads and calls the shots.

I don't know how it works for the girls in their early twenties on back, but for young women right through middle age and on up it works like a charm.

When you demonstrate leadership and dominance, you have to do it with absolute confidence, not caring if the outcome goes bad (I'm talking beyond the initial subject of texting). That's why we all need to start small and build ourselves up to it. Find one thing and do it with absolute confidence and reckless abandon. You will be shocked at how attractive that is to her.

Be so confident and non-caring that you even surprise yourself. It just takes a mental shift.

Of course, there can be exceptions, but I haven't run into any yet. If a girl did call me a control freak, I would completely ignore it and pretend she never said it. Another thing we must all learn is that every question from her should not be answered, and every comment should not be acknowledged.

 

[Crissco]

Remember in the Great Pumpkin when Sally looks at Linus and the little hearts flutter out of her head? That's the look I get.

Women today are starving for a real man who leads and calls the shots.

I don't know how it works for the girls in their early twenties on back, but for young women right through middle age and on up it works like a charm.

When you demonstrate leadership and dominance, you have to do it with absolute confidence, not caring if the outcome goes bad (I'm talking beyond the initial subject of texting). That's why we all need to start small and build ourselves up to it. Find one thing and do it with absolute confidence and reckless abandon. You will be shocked at how attractive that is to her.

Be so confident and non-caring that you even surprise yourself. It just takes a mental shift.

Of course, there can be exceptions, but I haven't run into any yet. If a girl did call me a control freak, I would completely ignore it and pretend she never said it. Another thing we must all learn is that every question from her should not be answered, and every comment should not be acknowledged.

Can you elaborate a bit more on that. And what should you say when she starts asking you questions.

 

[Atom Smasher]

Can you elaborate a bit more on that. And what should you say when she starts asking you questions.

Sure. Most men today give off the vibe that they are eager to quickly react to anything and everything she says. What develops is a very subtle "dancing monkey" dynamic. She asks or states, and he reacts.

My rule of thumb:
Women react. Men respond.

Reacting entails a quick, emotion driven reaction to a person. Responding conveys a controlled, thought-driven response. I'm responding because I decided to respond. Once in a while I decide not to. It sets a subtle frame that you are deciding what is worthy of response and what is not.

So I find that once in a while I will completely ignore her question. It's a move of dominance and it separates you from the billions of male reactors out there. Answer most of them. Just withhold an answer once in a while. Same with her comments or statements. Especially the many ones she uses to try to get a rise out of you.

 

[Crissco]

Sure. Most men today give off the vibe that they are eager to quickly react to anything and everything she says. What develops is a very subtle "dancing monkey" dynamic. She asks or states, and he reacts.

My rule of thumb:
Women react. Men respond.

Reacting entails a quick, emotion driven reaction to a person. Responding conveys a controlled, thought-driven response. I'm responding because I decided to respond. Once in a while I decide not to. It sets a subtle frame that you are deciding what is worthy of response and what is not.

So I find that once in a while I will completely ignore her question. It's a move of dominance and it separates you from the billions of male reactors out there. Answer most of them. Just withhold an answer once in a while. Same with her comments or statements. Especially the many ones she uses to try to get a rise out of you.

I like that, im going to give it a shot. Thanks Atom Smasher, always a great help :rockon:

 

[Alexander]

You really don't need to tell her to shut off her phone. If a girl has high interest level, she won't be texting in front of you. Her texting is a good indicator that she has low interest and bored of you.