Telling stories...

[DJHoolahoop]

The art of conversation or so it would seem.

All the time that's how I see people talk with others. Stories relating to themselves or others. How their friend ate dishwasher soap after drinking a 12pack of beer or the embarassing time they were at a club and while they were dancing their pants fell down.

Ok those were lame examples, but it's something I've been noticing more and more and picking up on more and more. That when I watch more and more how people interact amongst each other, that usually it has to deal with a story or a reference to something that happened. Whether it be something they all experienced, a couple of them experienced or NONE of them experienced, it's something I've been noticing.

Now personally there's only so many things I talk about. Typically I talk to others about things that reflect my personal interests or something relating to news, sports or activities. Never is it as a reference to something that has HAPPENED to me or someone else I know.

Like take this forum for example, the concept and idea of self-help and what I've come to realize is what I discuss with others who are interested in knowing about it or discussing it. So I can sit there and talk about pyschology and other things of interest, but never can I really think of times when I went out and ____ happened, etc.

People I hang around with will bring it up to no end, about people from their work or a vacation that was never to be forgotten, etc. So it makes things interesting, but for me I can sit there and watch this while thinking to myself that "man I have nothing when it comes to this"

So now I have an actual question out there, well make that two. 1) do others out there know what I am refering to here? and 2) how is it that those of you who do this sort of thing, gain these sort of stories or retain them? For me it just might be a case of either not really looking for them so I can remember these stories for later OR not being active enough to be in situations where a story will develop. In either case any tips on how you guys get these stories and references and any tips on how I can improve this aspect?

 

[themanwithnoname]

telling hilarious stories shows you have a life.

 

[dice]

this is my main focus right now. I've also been watching how other people react with eachother and most of what you say is true. I'd say stories and information are the two main things people talk about. Most people talk to raise their own self-worth and telling stories shows that your life is fun and you have a sense of humor, and showing intellegence is the goal of sharing information.

 

[aftershock]

I find stories are good as long as they're short. You don't want to BORE the chick!

 

[wind20mph]

Its good, telling stories on the other hand is one way of relating to her. As long as it isn't boring, its diging her imagination and waking the sub concious mind

 

[I_Only_Live_Once]

djhoolahoop: this is an area i'm working on also, and I do know what you're saying. I'm thinking that it's a combination of 3 things: (a) go out more, (b) be more receptive, and (c) change your attitude. I'll explain:

(a) you're not gonna have a lot of stories to tell about your life or situations of people you know if you spend most of your time on the computer, or watching tv, or doing something that isn't social. Funny stories often come out from social interactions or environments that are different to what you're used to.

(b) stand-up comedians get their material because they're receptive to their environment. They'll usually write down a funny idea or incident on a napkin/paper right away to remember it. Now, I'm not saying that you're striving to be a stand-up comedian, but the idea is that if you're more receptive to what goes on or even reflect back, you may think of something funny.

(c) stories are not just what actually happens. It's the WAY you tell it. Think of a time when someone told you a funny story. It's very easy to tell that exact same story in a different way and make it very dull and boring. When telling a story, you should display charm, confidence, and even a bit of timing (although I don't think this is as important in everyday socializing). You can also make situations that weren't very funny, and spin them in such a way to make it funny. I think you can do this by adding or emphasing certain aspects of the story.

 

[I_Only_Live_Once]

As an assignment, you can try standing in front of a mirror, and coming up with, say, 3 funny stories. This way you can look at yourself and see how you carry yourself when telling the story. Displaying confidence, charisma, and humour should be the goal.

Telling stories well can make any situation better. Any time an awkward silence occurs, just tell a story. It will give you good rapport.

 

[gruby]

I'm a good story teller what do you want to know? Don't think that knowing how to tell stories will get you in as with everything it has its drawbacks. You got people around you sticking around just waiting for another story - you become their entertainment center. Kinda frustrating sometimes.