5string said:
backbreaker
Yer wife know you talk to your ex's? Just curious and not trying to give you a hard time. If my wife talked to her ex's, even with me knowing, I'd have a major problem with it. She'd have to unfvck herself immediately if she wanted our marriage to stay intact. That behavior would be unacceptable to me.
i mean not all of them. there are 2 i keep in touch with, she's met both. hell one of them goes shopping / get hair and **** done with her everytime we go to little rock.
there is just nothing there. we knew each other, we fvcked, dated, and one thing led to another where i / we realized it just wasn't going to work. one of them we talk / email a few times a month, one i might send anj email / call to 2-3 times a year just to see how she's doing and she wil do the same for me.
plus in both of their cases, we still have a somewhat mutually benefiting relationship that has nothing to do with sex. one is a news caster in little rock. she's done stories for me/on me in the past when she needed something to do, help put my business // company name out and drum up business. the other is a bloodstock agent and helps me /is helping me pick out horses. i give her my business because i trust her judgement and she helps me with things that me or my wife doesn't understand. between her and my wife i have horses covered.
out of respect for my wife i would never put myself in a situtation with either of them where any doubt is going to come up. i'm not going to go "fix their computer" or something while their husbands not at home lol. i mean my wife has some friends, some male, some female, i dont' give a ****. they aren't fvcking her. i'm sure a few of them wouldn't mind but it's not happening. not the biggest of deals to me honestly. guess that's why we have such a good relationship, we don't smoother each other but at the same time we don't put ourselves in situations where doubt is going to come up. ns's not goign to go out and meet her guy friends at a bar at night or go over one of their houses or anything like that. the worst i've really had to deal with from her is running to a male friend at the mall and them getting a bite of pizza together. lol who cares? i don't. she told me about it, just like i tell her if I do something like that.
she still goes out with her girlfriends maybe 1-2 times a month for drinks. I go out 2-3 times a month, depending on whose playing to jazz clubs around town or a sports bar to watch a game just to get out the house. I feel personally that if you have a woman that you have to lock down, you don't' have the right woman, because i'm not going to stop doing the thigns I love doping / want to do that make me happy. If that's the point I don't see the point in being married.
lol what is she going to do cheat? if she is going to cheat she is going to cheat regardless of what restrictions i put on her. same with me.
it goes back to my oneitis and i remember all the times she would come over my house and stuff, and nothing would happen. if your woman is your woman, nothing is going to happen regardless of the circumstances.
had she been the type of woman where I felt that i had to worry about that type of **** with, i assure you i would not be married now, and the day i do have to worry about it, if I ever have to, we are going to have problems.
for me to function like i need to function i need my space. we live very mjuch separate lives under the same roof. i wake up and normally i'm in my work room for hours a day, she goes runs her errands and ****, i go to the gym, she's taking joe to daycare/picking him up, we might see each other for 1-2 hours a day. for me to be able to function like that, any woman I date, and in this case marry, I have to have full trust in. I trust that she is not going to put herself in situations where she is going to anything I would not approve of and visa versa. Which is why it's imoprtant to run every woman you date through all the tests and make them earn your trust. It makes your relationship stronger beucase you can still be you and do the things you need to do. When I was in AA, more than once i would get calls at 1-2am of people who really needed some help, and i would go talk to them at the waffle house or something like that and get them through whatever htey were going through without relaspsing. lol, how many women do you know you can date and just up and leave at 2am in the morning and they have full trust that you aren't doing anything you are supposed to do? She knows as long as she's fufilling my needs and is still the same gal i met 4 years ago, she has absolutely nothing to worry about, and I know just becuase dealing with women and dealing with her, as long as I am me, and I keep being me, she isn't going anywhere.
You can do what you want as you're already at the point in your life where you've paid your dues.
The successful people i know, when i asked them for advice about whether they get burned out or not their answer is yes they do. I then asked them how they dealt with being burnt out as i always see them working, how do they continue working or do they take breaks etc.
Everyone one of them responds, it's tough and i'm tired but they say you got to keep moving. They don't stop till they're done whatever it is they're doing. Whether its a project, studying for a test, etc. My one friend who inspired me to keep going was a foreign student at my university from Malaysia.
He founded the Malaysian Student Association, wrote a proposal for a club budget and got it. He then revived the Badminton club and became the president and helped take them to the national finals and got the team a huge budget to take the whole team to california. He won the business concept competition that i finaled in and placed top 3 for the business plan competition. He was also the valedictorian for the Chemical Engineering program and was also doing a combined masters program called the BSMS. He never once complained which i did alot. His father passed away not too and he kept on trucking and booked a ticket back home. He's now pursuing his PhD in Chemical Engineering. He will get his and sit back and relax one day.
when i say i am burned out I mean I'm toast right now. i don't think many have experienced the level of burnout i'm reffering to. just like, kyou wake up in the morning and there is like a weight on you that won't let you get out of bed burnout.
i push myself pretty hardm, but i like that about me and i doubt i change.
