Take Back Your Power!

[Señor Fingers]

After all the analyzation of Social Distortion, the Feminization of Man and the perceived power struggle of the sexes, I finally realized something...

Many of us are giving our power away to external influences and are left with none for ourselves.

Society

Our favorite scapegoat of all time. This is the classic bleeding heart logic at work...

"Oh its not HIS fault he murdered a small village..he was a troubled youth and is clinically insane..SOCIETY made him this way"

Or in most of the cases here.....

"Its not my fault I am intimidated by women. I was raised AFC! Society is fuct up!"

Well, its no secret we havent achieved utopia yet. But you will get no closer to your goals by playing the Blame Game. Its one thing to understand the root of your dysfunction and another to accept responsibilty for it.

A brief tale to illustrate my point...

I used to run into this beggar on the subway all the time. I felt really bad for him because he was about my age and only had one leg. Whenever I saw him, I would give him whatever loose change I had. This made me feel good, knowing that I had helped someone who was relatively helpless. For months it was like this until one day everything changed.

I was walking down Houston street (one of the busiest intersections of NYC) and saw this crazy messenger weaving in and out of traffic on his bike and pulling some kamikazee manuevers. As a cyclist, I could appreciate his skill and walked to the corner to get a better view of this daredevil.

Well, much to my surprise, this guy was alot older than I though. His grey beard indicated a man of middle age. Upon closer inspection I couldnt believe what I saw. Yup, homeboy had ONE LEG! I had trremendous respect for this man and will never forget him. You can guess what happened next time I saw that bum on the subway. I didnt give him a dime because I realized he wasnt as helpless as I had thought.

One man used his disability as an excuse to fail, another used it as a challenge to succeed. The difference is astronomical!

Nationalities and Generalizations

"Asian Chicks are the best!" "White Chicks are whóres!" "English girls are cold!" "Stay away from black girls!!"

Yet again, more excuses.

"Its not really me, it is HER...damn these green-eyed/redheaded/etc girls!!"

It is much easier to blame our failures on a womans nationality, race or appearance than to face the fact that we might be doing something wrong.

Playing the victim will get you no closer to victory!

Brainwashing and the Media

"Feminists have taken over TV and film! Men are being portrayed more and more weak and submissive! We are trapped in the Matrix! Oh Noooo!"

What a load of BS! If you dont like what you see, then do what I did and turn off your TV and stop whining. Personally I cant stand television precisely because it is a parasite of my personal power. Why spend time sitting in a pool of drool, thinking the exact same thoughts as everyone else, when I could be writing a song or going for a run? (Hell, I find that I enjoy chatting with you guys more than watching these sh!tcoms anyday!)

The media is not doing a damn thing to you. It is YOU who are allowing yourself to be influenced! Take responsibility for how you spend your time and if you find yourself doing something that you feels is weakening you on a subconscious level, then stop it! (duh!)

Women and Seduction

"Women have all the power! They use their sexuality as leverage in a nefarious power struggle against men!"

Wrong wrong wrong. People only have as much power over you as you give them. Of course there are women who use their beauty to manipulate, but what does this have to do with YOU?

Seduction is not a war against women. It really is more of a dance than a competition. If there is any struggle involved, it is a battle for empowerment within YOURSELF. Treating women like the enemy whose defenses you must destroy will not get you very far!

Instead of thinking of this as a battle for power and dominance, think of it as an opportunity to display your great personality and confidence in order to genuinely connect with another human being. Often times the straightforward approach is best.

Having said that, personally I have not had much luck just walking up to girls and simply asking them out. (Unless there are some serious
signals, EC ,etc) Usually, I give them a reason (aside from my good looks) to WANT to go out with me.

This means being comfortable in my own skin, making entertaining conversation and after displaying that I am a fun and interesting person, I go precisely after what I want, (be it the digits or an InstaDate)

At the end of the day this is a GIRL we are talking about here, not a trained soldier you must defeat!

Instead of giving women all the power, your attitude should be "Yeah you are cute, but else you got going for ya?" In fact the whole purpose of you asking her out is to screen her to see if she is worthy of YOU. Not the other way around.

So often we fukk up by becoming starstruck and impressed by the fact that a girl was born with good genes. Once again we give our power away, this time to the random couplings of chromosomes!

Conclusion

Stop making excuses for yourself. Life is not fair and we all have to play our best with the hand we are dealt. No sense in crying over a lousy hand when you can simply make the most of it. You have much more power than you probably give yourself credit for!

So whats it gonna be?

Are you the man who overcomes the obstacles and makes sh!t happen?
Or are you the chump who underestimates himself and makes excuses?

The most empowering fact of all is that the choice is yours, my friend.

Carpe diem.

 

[WestCoaster]

Good post

Good point on society. Like one website said, "Screw society. What did society ever do for you? Nothing!"

Society sets up stupid rules. There are laws and ethics that are good to obey, but for the most part society is wrong.

* I still think American women suck and would rather channel my energies into someone international instead of try to change the warped views of American women. It won't work, but to each his own. If you like banging your head against a wall, fine. I'd rather be good from the get-go than play resident shrink.

 

[ManOMan]

Senor Fingers,

Good post. But the popular theme around these forums regarding power struggle is the old mantra "Women dont have Power! Unless you give it to them!"

Maybe I am not expressing myself too well, but if you look at most HB's, they have been taught from birth that their sexual appeal/allure IS their power, Their ticket to get anything they want.

Ever hear of women saying to another "ohh show some cleavage and you can get the man to do what you want"?

This is obviously perceived "power" or leverage women intuitively think they have over men.

Not only that, if you are a HB, most likely every guy she has encountered in her past has reinforced her ego that she has this power of sexual allure.

Now, sure, a DJ can fantasize "She has no power, their is no power struggle!, its all in my head! It doesnt exist!"

The power struggle may be one-sided. Women think they have it, and they will sh1t test any man they meet.

This is where theories such as neg hits, playing hard to get, ignoring, push-pull, etc all come into relevance.

They are basically sending the message "your beauty has no bearing in my life" - as a means to neutralize the power struggle or get the upper hand.

Im trying real hard to get into the mindset that "power struggles dont exist", but its just impossible for me. For when I meet women, I get a complete air of arrogance sometimes or feel like I have to "penetrate their psyche" just to have a decent introduction with them.

I dont have problems being friendly with guys. Because they dont have the same type of defenses up as women do.

 

[Señor Fingers]

There is an exchange of energy, but there is no battle!

Your power as a man is the power of Initiation. You do all the approaching and take all the risks of rejection.

Women have the power of Selection. For most of them, even the not so good looking ones, men are constantly trying to get in their pants. The "b!tch shield" is just a time-management tool. She cant possibly date all these guys that are interested in her. Its physically impossible! So she makes you jump a few hoops to see what kind of man you are..

She doesnt sh!t test you to gain power over you, she does it to see if you are strong enough to dominate her. Women get off on submitting the control while we get off on seizing it. Yin and Yang. All these tests are really her way of saying "Can you handle me?"

You fail because you cant handle the "power" you feel they "use" against you. Your problem is that you give these girls special treatment strictly due to their beauty and fail the very first test! You said yourself that you only have trouble talking to beautiful women.

So do yourself a favor. Forget C&F, forget negs. All of the acronyms you learn on this site is just geekspeak for being a playful and interesting challenge. Arent these the qualities we look for in any companion? (Unless you enjoy hanging out with people who feel they must shatter your defenses in order to talk to you.)

Hell, I NEG-HIT® my friends all the time and am C&F® as hell, because it makes the interaction fun when you can bust someones chops and have them laugh with you on it, and vice versa.

Stop treatin these chicks like goddesses that have fallen to earth and whose impenetrable b!tch shield must be destroyed. This is the pitfall of tactics. Often times you end up analyzing your reality like a field report and lose touch with the magic of the moment...

 

[RawkinKaoticStyle]

I think theres kind of 2 parts to this.

The inner and the outer

The inner , would be to quit making excuses for your self, making generalizations about other people, and all thoes thoughts that go on inside your head to viod you of what you want to do.

Me personally have been working on this inner but i feel i want to expand to the outer, can you tell me a way to have a start at this outer ?

not anything elaborate, like you might say go read this post or such and such just something brief?

 

[ManOMan]

Sounds like a fair enough explantion.

Yet, isnt the power of selection, often greater then the power of initiation?

Sure, any guy can eventually try to grow a set, and approach many women. But he is at a disadvantage when isnt all that attractive. He will have limited supply in his selection.

Even when you say a girl thinks "can he handle me?" isnt that an socio-evolutionary variation of "does he have enough power to subdue me? Conquer me?"

Isnt she saying "my power of sexuality is so strong, I can have that power of selection, therefore I have that latitude to be extremely picky and choosy?"

and explain to me when I hear girls say "ohh my bf is so whooped", "he likes me he will do anything for me" or in relationships when women attempt to control guys ?

Ive read most of your weapons of mass destruction, even the "party/club" girl you wrote about, she would play hard to get, then you would play hard to get, then she eventually gave in when you werent giving her the upper hand in dominance

wasnt that a power struggle??

Even the title of your post, implies there is an exchange of power.

and you cant deny the mechanism with dominance and submissiveness in human relations. Its been documented everywhere, especially in evolutionary theory.

 

[Señor Fingers]

Originally posted by ManOMan
Sounds like a fair enough explantion.

Yet, isnt the power of selection, often greater then the power of initiation?

They both have their pluses and minuses. Personally, I would rather have the option to initiate than be passive and just accept what comes my way. It must be annoying too for women, having all these losers trying to hit on them all the time with their crappy one-liners. Bet it gets old fast..**** I would make these fools buy me drinks too! Gotta be some compensation!

Originally posted by ManOMan
Sure, any guy can eventually try to grow a set, and approach many women. But he is at a disadvantage when isnt all that attractive. He will have limited supply in his selection.

I am a decent looking guy but that has done nothing for me in the past except maybe get a girls attention. I didnt know how to handle the situation once I had a girl interested. I would keep freezing up, baffled that this amazingly gorgeous chick could actually be interested. I felt "out of my league".

You would be surprised what people consider attractive. Girls are not attracted to one type of guy- If you are not hideously obese or ridden with a morbid case of acne, you have as much a chance as anyone. Ultimately we all have limitied supply due to the fact that everyone has different taste. Not every girl will fall for me. I have accepted this.

Originally posted by ManOMan
Even when you say a girl thinks "can he handle me?" isnt that an socio-evolutionary variation of "does he have enough power to subdue me? Conquer me?"

Yes but even deeper than this is "Is he in control of himself? Is he easily swayed?" A woman wants to feel secure around you. If you are the type who gets his feather ruffled real easy, you will scare her off into LJBF land, because you are not satisfying that primal need she has to be subdued and protected.

Originally posted by ManOMan
and explain to me when I hear girls say "ohh my bf is so whooped", "he likes me he will do anything for me" or in relationships when women attempt to control guys ?

I never said these girls dont exist. Just dont fall into the trap of thinking they are all like this.

Originally posted by ManOMan
Ive read most of your weapons of mass destruction, even the "party/club" girl you wrote about, she would play hard to get, then you would play hard to get, then she eventually gave in when you werent giving her the upper hand in dominance

wasnt that a power struggle??

You know. I felt the same way when I wrote that report. But looking back on that and many other experiences I am beginning to see she was really testing how much control I had over myself. She would toss all sorts of lastminuteresistance to see if I would start whining or begging. When I didnt do this she realized I was not like all the other guys and I could honestly take her or leave her. The fact that I was satisfied in my world no matter what the outcome is what finally flipped the switch for her from "Lets flirt" to "Lets fukk"

Originally posted by ManOMan
Even the title of your post, implies there is an exchange of power.

Exactly! An exchange, not a war! Women are not the enemy. Your own insecurities and self-limiting beliefs are the real nemesis.

Originally posted by ManOMan
and you cant deny the mechanism with dominance and submissiveness in human relations. Its been documented everywhere, especially in evolutionary theory.

True. But how can a man dominate a woman when he cant even take control of his own life? If you are focusing on HER power all the time, then you are effectively relinquishing your own!

Great questions though. Made me dig a little deeper.

 

[ManOMan]

Fingers,

I never said women are your "enemy". Power struggles dont always need a Protagonist and an enemy.

Its just a type of heirarchy of social interaction.

When you have a power struggle with a car dealer, is he your enemy? yet behind your mind its a testosterone driven struggle to figure out who will get the upper hand? you or the dealer

As I debate with you now? Am I your enemy? or are we locking horns in an intellectual debate to see who provides the best supportive arguments?

I hear gal-pals of mine all the time gab about "how Im too beautiful for him" or "I can do better"

Based on What? The idea that just because you are attractive, you have an upper hand?

even the theory that you have to knock a girl off her pedestal, is a type of removal of "power" women perceive they have

Look at reality shows where guys or girls have the option to choose over 20-30 dates, do you not think the women feel a surge of "power" that they can have any guy they want, and the guy has to prove themseleves as "worthy"?

 

[So pimp its scary]

This is an interesting thread, I'll give my 2cents...

Who really has the power in seduction?

It seems that most of your opinions are either that men have the power, and give it up willingly to the woman. I believe that the woman has the power in the relationship.

First of all, as everyone knows, it's the man's DUTY to approach women, and to take all the risks to get what he wants. This might put him in a stronger deciding position, but in terms of his power it keeps it fairly limited.

Let's talk about a university graduation for a moment, is the graduation ceremony to celebrate the students completion of the curriculum? No. Rather, the ceremony is a demonstration of the universities POWER to award the diplomas. How does the ceremony usually unfold? First, the students line up in their chairs, usually accompanied by music, followed by the teachers, and the last person to walk in is the dean or principle, who then immediately begins his speach.

In graduation ceremonies, like ALL ceremonies, its the person with the most power who waits the least.

Let's take a look at relationships... I'll use, for simplicities sake, the typical married couple. The woman, who is preparing herself for an evening out takes her time, chooses her garmants, hairstyle, make-up and all. What is the man doing during this process? Waiting... bored out of his mind that his wife takes so much time. (Although, when she is ready, in a healthy relationship, the man will find that it was worth the wait)... So on this level the woman has the power.

Secondly, the act of approaching in itself. In the military, when an officer walks past the subordinate, the subordinate will salute. Thus demonstrating the importance of the officer.

If you were to visit the queen, you would first address her as "Your Majesty" before she will speak (as well as many other customs that are irrelevent to this discussion)...

Therefore, the act of approaching and saying hello to a woman that interests you is a way of showing to the woman the importance that she has, in your mind, that she is worth you taking the time to say hello.

Lastly, Where its' the man's duty to take charge of the relationship, and the direction that everything is heading. The woman has the power to decide that she doesn't want you, and a simple 'no' will end any further pursuits (without risking breaking the law).

In conclusion, In terms of power on the interaction and social level, the female has the upper hand. It's not necessarily a bad thing, just something to accept, and to work with. A man that makes the most of his power while respecting the woman's power is sure to find happiness in his pursuits in seduction.

 

[Señor Fingers]

Originally posted by ManOMan
I never said women are your "enemy". Power struggles dont always need a Protagonist and an enemy.

Its just a type of heirarchy of social interaction.

When you have a power struggle with a car dealer, is he your enemy? yet behind your mind its a testosterone driven struggle to figure out who will get the upper hand? you or the dealer

As I debate with you now? Am I your enemy? or are we locking horns in an intellectual debate to see who provides the best supportive arguments?

Interesting. You choose to see struggle in your analogies, but all I see is a process of compromise and understanding...

If I am haggling with a car dealer, I am not seeking dominance over him. I simply want avoid getting ripped off! So I make my standards known, he sets prices and we NEGOTIATE.

Right now I am not "locking horns" with you for social supremacy. We are having a discussion based on our own experiences. Isnt this what our opinions are based on?

Take me for example...

In the last two years I have had many experiences with women, both good and bad. Looking back on the times I was successful, I realize that I was not concerned with the woman´s power at all. I guess being around attractive girls all the time kind of numbed me to their beauty. It just didnt faze me anymore.

See, I am reinforcing my ideas here with POSITIVE experiences. I benefitted by taking back my power.

This is why I post here. Whenever I discover something that has helped me progress I decide to share it with yall. I am not concerned with "DJ Theory" because my ideas are reinforced by my lifestyle and actions in THE REAL WORLD.

Honestly it sounds to me like you are basing your deductions off your NEGATIVE experiences with women... Where is the success you have achieved by believing women have the power?

Originally posted by ManOMan
I hear gal-pals of mine all the time gab about "how Im too beautiful for him" or "I can do better"

Based on What? The idea that just because you are attractive, you have an upper hand?

Its becoming clearer now. To you this is a "theory" debate, because your only point of reference is what your gal-pals say. Fukk theories dude! That is the biggest problem with the board these days, all these guys posting up their hypothetical ideas about women when they dont have any experiences (except with their LJBFs) to back it up.

Originally posted by ManOMan
even the theory that you have to knock a girl off her pedestal, is a type of removal of "power" women perceive they have

In physics, energy cannot be destroyed or removed. Same applies to relationships. You cannot "remove" a womans power. You can either succumb to it or tap into your own and make her the submissive one!

All this talk of power struggles and pedestals is a misrepresentation of reality IMO. Often times a women will try to elevate herself above you based on her visual status. But she cannot climb to such lofty heights unless you put her there!

Lets run with your assumption that a woman has all the power, just for the hell of it. Who do you think stands a better chance with this chick? The guy who is threatened by her splendor and feels he must "strip it away", or the one who feels HE holds the cards and she must rise to HIS level?

Originally posted by ManOMan
Look at reality shows where guys or girls have the option to choose over 20-30 dates, do you not think the women feel a surge of "power" that they can have any guy they want, and the guy has to prove themseleves as "worthy"?

This is worse than I thought. Now you are basing your ideas on seduction off of REALITY SHOWS. *shakes head*

ManOManOMan... it sounds to me like you could use a dose of reality yourself. I sincerely hope I am wrong, but from what you have written so far, I can guess that you havent had much success with women,

In fact, I am willing to bet that the reason you are a little defensive about this is because I have touched on the heart of your problem!

Ultimately, you can believe what you want, but your credibility is not that strong considering the sources of your deductions, IMHO.

Take heart though.. for it seems you have company in your reasoning. Lets see what this guy has to say for himself..

 

[Señor Fingers]

Originally posted by So pimp its scary
First of all, as everyone knows, it's the man's DUTY to approach women, and to take all the risks to get what he wants. This might put him in a stronger deciding position, but in terms of his power it keeps it fairly limited.

I used to think this too. But now I actually sorry for girls because while the majority of them have more options, they are missing the most important one of all... being able to go for what they want! I love being a man for this reason. Perhaps this is why my views may be a little biased here...

Lets take a step back from our preferences for a minute and look at the bigger picture...

Like everything else in nature, men and women were created to balance each other out. We have the power to approach them spread our seed and they have the power receive us and give birth. Which is more powerful? Its really a subjective debate but I would be willing to say that our power is equal, but DIFFERENT.

Originally posted by So pimp its scary
Let's talk about a university graduation for a moment. How does the ceremony usually unfold? First, the students line up in their chairs, usually accompanied by music, followed by the teachers, and the last person to walk in is the dean or principle, who then immediately begins his speach.

In graduation ceremonies, like ALL ceremonies, its the person with the most power who waits the least.

Huh? You totally contradicted yourself. If the person with the most power waits the least, then why does the principal have to wait till the end to speak? Maybe I misunderstand....

Originally posted by So pimp its scary
Let's take a look at relationships... I'll use, for simplicities sake, the typical married couple. The woman, who is preparing herself for an evening out takes her time, chooses her garmants, hairstyle, make-up and all. What is the man doing during this process? Waiting... bored out of his mind that his wife takes so much time. (Although, when she is ready, in a healthy relationship, the man will find that it was worth the wait)... So on this level the woman has the power.

Perfect example. For the sake of discussion lets run with this.

THE REALITY
Woman takes a long time to get ready and man waits for her

FEMALE POWER
She has control over her man because she knows he wont leave without her and it doesnt matter if he is late. What is more important is that her eyelashes look good!

MALE POWER
He has control over his self image and doesnt need to spend countless hours in preparation. His power is his simplicity and aside from healthy grooming, he couldnt care less what people think of his appearance. He has more important things to worry about!

See how you can empower yourself just by looking at things a little differently? If you are a real man, then you embrace this power and pull the woman into your frame of influence..

For example

Anytime a girl has taken too long getting ready, I have been totally understanding and patient, until we reach the point where we are gonna be late and she is fukking up the plan.

This is when I lay down the law and let her know that I will leave without her! I communicate the fact that our plans are more important than her eyelashes and she RESPECTS me for this. I train my women very well. My last GF was terribly obsessed with her make-up and preparation. But all it took was a knowing look from me and she would scamper out of the bathroom saying "Okay! Okay! I am ready!!"

Do women have power? Of course! Her power only becomes greater than yours when you NEGLECT YOUR OWN.

Originally posted by So pimp its scary
Secondly, the act of approaching in itself. In the military, when an officer walks past the subordinate, the subordinate will salute. Thus demonstrating the importance of the officer.

Yes. But isnt the officer doing the approaching in this situation? I would say he takes on the masculine role here, the soldiers are his b!tches!

Originally posted by So pimp its scary
If you were to visit the queen, you would first address her as "Your Majesty" before she will speak (as well as many other customs that are irrelevent to this discussion)...

You wouldnt exactly pat the king on the back and say "wassup fool!" either.. (why do you ignore the mans power?)

Originally posted by So pimp its scary
Therefore, the act of approaching and saying hello to a woman that interests you is a way of showing to the woman the importance that she has, in your mind, that she is worth you taking the time to say hello.

Of course this is flattering and empowering to her. But why shouldnt it be for you too? You are going after what you want and this should make you feel good about yourself!

Originally posted by So pimp its scary
Lastly, Where its' the man's duty to take charge of the relationship, and the direction that everything is heading. The woman has the power to decide that she doesn't want you, and a simple 'no' will end any further pursuits (without risking breaking the law).

A man also has the power to decide when he doesnt want a woman. I fail to see how this ability is linked to having a vagina.

As for the whole "no means no" issue. Women are often slaves to social perceptions. They dont want to look slutty so they throw up the last minute resistance to preserve their respectable images.

Honestly, we can argue semantics forever but it still wont change reality.

Think about this, she has the power to say no to your advances. But she lacks the power to make these advances herself! Which power is greater?

In all your examples you have managed to omit the womans weaknesses and focused only on her strengths.

This mentality is all too common on this board. No wonder most of the guys here dont succeed! They think these chicks are like GOD or something! LOL!

I appreciate the input though Mr.ScaryPimp. I love having my ideas challenged because it helps me to understand them (and you) much better.

Its actually funny because I agree with your last statement 100%

Originally posted by So pimp its scary
A man that makes the most of his power while respecting the woman's power is sure to find happiness in his pursuits in seduction.

Amen!

In closing, I hope I havent offended you guys with my directness.

All I can say is take this post for what its worth...

One of the best things I ever did for my Inner Game was reclaim my personal power. This post is my gift to yall and I hope you will take it to heart!

Next time you get attitude from a girl dont buy into her power. Enforce your own by showing that you wont be a dancing monkey for her like all the rest. The game totally changes when you REALLY internalize the belief that she has to meet YOUR expectations!

Here is a new mantra for you....

"I am not easily impressed"

 

[Señor Fingers]

Originally posted by RawkinKaoticStyle
I think theres kind of 2 parts to this.

The inner and the outer

The inner , would be to quit making excuses for your self, making generalizations about other people, and all thoes thoughts that go on inside your head to viod you of what you want to do.

Me personally have been working on this inner but i feel i want to expand to the outer, can you tell me a way to have a start at this outer ?

not anything elaborate, like you might say go read this post or such and such just something brief?

Almost missed this...

You are right about the internal VS the external.

The funny thing about the External Realm is that there is nothing you can read that will make this change for you. Coming to this site and seeing women and yourself differently is the internal part.

The external comes by trial and error. By taking risks, getting shot down repeatedly and sometimes succeeding, you start to develop an intuition as to what works for you and what doesnt. Most of this sh!t is just timing, knowing how to spot windows of opportunities and what to do when they present themselves.

No post, article or book could possibly cover this because there are too many variables at play. Anything can happen! Just like you can read about driving a car for years and then actually sit in one and have no idea how to drive, at some point you have to step into the Outer Realm and develop that bodily knowledge that comes with experience.

 

[ManOMan]

Senor,

Now instead of supporting your claims, you are attacking a person and not the argument itself.

is this not a theortical difference? Im 28, I have had about 5-6 relationships in the past all lasting 2-3 years each.

My stance does not come from reality shows, LJBF's, or whatever other form of medium you like to use to discredit me.

Its based simply on my experiences

when you are discussing something such as realistic/imagined power between the sexes what types of support for your arguments do you expect to have besides experience, theory, and objective inquery from women?

Ive provided alot of support for my claims(from my experience, evolutionary theory, media, and asking the opinions of others), whereas your stance is just introspective rationalization.

where is your evidence that a power struggle doesnt exist?? The fact that you have "Experience" with women is a cheap cop out.

and finally you keep saying that power doesnt exist, then contradicting yourself by saying "dont give women your power"

" Next time you get attitude from a girl dont buy into her power. Enforce your own by showing that you wont be a dancing monkey for her like all the rest. The game totally changes when you REALLY internalize the belief that she has to meet YOUR expectations!"

This is my point exactly. Im not talking about bumping heads with women or to show her Im more Powerful than her!

My stance is to point out that women will often think they HAVE a certain power, and its a mans duty to either neurtralize her beliefs or exalt his own greatness over hers

 

[The Antichrist_Star]

Senor Fingers... I applaud you. You make it sound so easy... because you realized it really is that easy.

 

[So pimp its scary]

A rebuke(right word?)...

Originally posted by Señor Fingers
I used to think this too. But now I actually sorry for girls because while the majority of them have more options, they are missing the most important one of all... being able to go for what they want! I love being a man for this reason. Perhaps this is why my views may be a little biased here...

I actually agree with this stance... Men have the power of choice, and women are the victims of choice (in that they are forced to choose out of the men that choose them).

Lets take a step back from our preferences for a minute and look at the bigger picture...

Like everything else in nature, men and women were created to balance each other out. We have the power to approach them spread our seed and they have the power receive us and give birth. Which is more powerful? Its really a subjective debate but I would be willing to say that our power is equal, but DIFFERENT.

Once again, you hit my actual belief head on. Men's power is different then a woman's. But, it is an equal power, like the yin (or ying, I forget) and the yang.

Huh? You totally contradicted yourself. If the person with the most power waits the least, then why does the principal have to wait till the end to speak? Maybe I misunderstand....

I'll explain a little more for clarity, in a graduation ceremony; the parents have the least power, or authority (semantics) and are forced to wait in their chairs for half an hour or longer, then the students are the next in the authority/power chain as they walk-up to the stage next, followed by the teachers, and so on untill the most powerful /authoritative/important person walks in (the principle in this example who then immediately begins his speech.

I forget the details, but, according to my socio prof in univ, a war was once almost started because, during a queens vist, the king of the "lesser" country made the queen wait for 2 minutes before he enterred. He was attacked by the people accompanying the queen by saying "How dare you allow Her Majesty to wait for your arrival."

Do women have power? Of course! Her power only becomes greater than yours when you NEGLECT YOUR OWN.

I believe this sums up the whole discussion...

Yes. But isnt the officer doing the approaching in this situation? I would say he takes on the masculine role here, the soldiers are his b!tches!

Actually, the officer could be walking past without stopping, but the subordinate is still expected to salute, thus demonstrating the officers authority, and is also expected to stand at attention untill either the officer leaves or allows him to do so.

You wouldnt exactly pat the king on the back and say "wassup fool!" either.. (why do you ignore the mans power?)

A man also has the power to decide when he doesnt want a woman. I fail to see how this ability is linked to having a vagina.

True, I think this goes back to Men have the power of choice, and women are the victims of choice (in that they are forced to choose out of the men that choose them).

Think about this, she has the power to say no to your advances. But she lacks the power to make these advances herself! Which power is greater?

In all your examples you have managed to omit the womans weaknesses and focused only on her strengths.

This mentality is all too common on this board. No wonder most of the guys here dont succeed! They think these chicks are like GOD or something! LOL!

I laughed when I read this little bit, because, as I look back at what I wrote, the arguments I made sort of forced me to focus more on the strengths then the weaknesses... but I'm glad I wrote it the way I did, because that would complicate my efforts ten fold to include the weaknesses and strengths of both sides of the coin.

Here is a new mantra for you....

"I am not easily impressed"

I like the sounds of that... but keep the discussions coming... they are the brief examples of what discussing seduction is all about.

What I mean is that through the true understanding and implementation of all that there is to know in seduction is what will make some (because not all can be true seducers) to become the shining examples of themselves that they truly want to become.

 

[Gonzalo]

Senor, good post. The discussion so far has been mainly about power, I have some thoughts on the "nationalities" part though.

I'm from Peru, came to US for college when I was 18 and I guess I have adapted to the US way for pretty much everyday stuff. The DJying stuff I learnt I learnt it trying it out while I was here in the US, and there is a HUGE difference when I go back home to Lima, Peru and try out stuff that I take for granted here. Say I approach the same, act myself similarly, etc, but girls just don't respond the same, not an excuse to not approach, cause I do, but they are just colder. Say, in my city if you go to an OK-hip club, fine you can get numbers, dances, kiss (after sorting through 99% of the girls), but ONS are out of question.

I can only speak for my country, but the way things work there girls won't go with a stranger or whatever (countries in L.America have been hit by terrorist for a long time). Also, girls don't expect to meet a potential BF in a club, perhaps not even a new friend. I find the only realistic way to get to know these girls is by infiltrating into their circle of friends and moving up from there. Well, all this goes to say that different nationalities/ethnicities can be different when trying to mack them. I don't see that as a reason not to approach, but be ready to expect different success rates, at least statistically. G

 

[dietzcoi]

Great post, but I do think that TV has a seriously negative impact on all of us. Sure, some of us can turn it off, but the people (women) we interact with watch it, and watch the AFC shows that are presented. They then think this is the way of the world. THey think they can treat all men like Gaymond in "everybody likes Gaymond"!! It causes all of us to have to counteract the years of AFC upbringing.

It is simple to say don't watch it, but it has shaped our world. You can also say ignore the rain, and go out in a rainstorm without a raincoat... yes you can ignore it but you will get wet.

We have to deal with the world as it is. You can change yourself (inner game) but you have to deal with others (outer game) and so have to make allowances for the negative influence of TV and other media on society.

Dietzcoi

 

[Eternal]

Moved to Tips.

 

[oOh Nasty]

i am drowned in tears

 

[Señor Fingers]

Originally posted by ManOMan
Senor,

Now instead of supporting your claims, you are attacking a person and not the argument itself.

No attacks here. Merely dissecting the source of your argument. Are you threatened by the prospect of someone even suggesting you are not good at something? If so, you take yourself too seriously and need to lighten up buddy.

Originally posted by ManOMan
My stance does not come from reality shows, LJBF's, or whatever other form of medium you like to use to discredit me.

Its based simply on my experiences

where is your evidence that a power struggle doesnt exist?? The fact that you have "Experience" with women is a cheap cop out.

Oh I get it now. When I cite my experience as a refernce it is a cop-out, but it is totally legit when you do it...right.

Originally posted by ManOMan
and finally you keep saying that power doesnt exist, then contradicting yourself by saying "dont give women your power"

I challenge you to show me where I said "power doesnt exist" You are losing site of our original disagreement here. I said that women only have as much power as you give them, a point you have disagreed with, till now---

Originally posted by ManOMan
My stance is to point out that women will often think they HAVE a certain power, and its a mans duty to either neurtralize her beliefs or exalt his own greatness over hers

Now you are contradicting yourself and agreeing with me. But this is good. Shows me you are makin progress

Originally posted by The Matrix: Reloaded
Senor Fingers... I applaud you. You make it sound so easy... because you realized it really is that easy.

*bows graciously*

The funny part is that something so simple takes a lot of hard work to actually believe.

Originally posted by So pimp its scary
I think this goes back to Men have the power of choice, and women are the victims of choice (in that they are forced to choose out of the men that choose them).

What I mean is that through the true understanding and implementation of all that there is to know in seduction is what will make some (because not all can be true seducers) to become the shining examples of themselves that they truly want to become.

I knew we would end up in agreement. Play on, player.

Originally posted by Gonzalo
Well, all this goes to say that different nationalities/ethnicities can be different when trying to mack them. I don't see that as a reason not to approach, but be ready to expect different success rates, at least statistically. G

Of course game is affected by culture. My point is that you dont use these differences as an excuse to limit yourself by saying "I will not date these frigid Peruvian women!" Instead of making excuses, you make opportunities. You have the right attitude.

Originally posted by dietzcoi
It is simple to say don't watch (TV), but it has shaped our world. You can also say ignore the rain, and go out in a rainstorm without a raincoat... yes you can ignore it but you will get wet.

We have to deal with the world as it is. You can change yourself (inner game) but you have to deal with others (outer game) and so have to make allowances for the negative influence of TV and other media on society.

Bad analogy. When you go out in the rain and get wet, eventually you come home and dry off. There are no aftereffects. TV changes the way you think and interact with others.

Make no mistake, I am not denying TVs power over society or saying you should banish it from your life. If you are capable of watching a few shows for the enjoyment of it, I really cant knock that (I was a huge Simpsons fan for years)

But its foolish to complain about how castrated you feel by the messages behind the programming when the "off" button is conveniently within reach.

As for other peoples conditioning. This should not affect how you empower yourself. Your Inner Game should be honed by their Outer Game, but not controlled! Who runs your life...you or them?

The essence of this post is to claim your personal power by taking responsibilty for who you are and what you do. To me, this is what growing up and being a MAN is all about.

Originally posted by crazykid
Moved to Tips.

So profound! Great feedback as always, CK.

Originally posted by oOh Nasty
i am drowned in tears

Was it something I said?