For the actual tip, go to the end of this post.
THE STORY
This story took place about a year ago. My 11 year old niece decides she wants to stay the weekend at my house. My sister tells me that I'm the niece's favorite uncle and she has this little school girl crush on me.
Well, since I didn't want to let my niece down, I agreed to have her spend the weekend at my house. Anyway, the weekend went great. We watched videos, played games and ate whatever we wanted, whenever we wanted. Any kid would've had a good time, being treated like this.
Now for the basis of this post. As I'm about to take her back home, she tells me that I'm TOO NICE and wouldn't make a good father. To this day, the niece hasn't wanted to spend another weekend at my house. So what did I do wrong to go from the favorite uncle, to her not wanting to come over anymore?
THE THEORY
Women are wired to grow up and have babies to keep the species going. They look for the man who'll be able to provide such things as food, shelter and protection. They also look for a man who'll discipline and teach the children right from wrong.
This is where I think I went wrong with my niece. I think she wanted to come to my house not only to have a good time, but to practice her qualifying skills for a potential husband/father. (She's still young, so she doesn't know you're not supposed to marry your own uncle.) If this were the case, then I failed her test miserably. I let her do whatever she wanted. If she wanted to go rent movies, I took her and we got movies. If she wanted ice cream for breakfast, I let her have ice cream for breakfast. In other words, I spoiled her for the entire weekend.
My theory is that women watch how you treat them and think that this is the way you'll treat the kids if you and her were ever to get married and start a family. Since I spoiled her rotten, she was probably thinking that I'd raise the kids in the same manner. SHE DOESN'T WANT THIS. Who'd want their kids to grow up and be spoiled little brats? Not only that, but a spoiled kid would have a tough time in the real world when they get out on their own.
This leads me to the theory on why a woman picks jerks over the nice guys.
MY THEORY ON NICE GUYS vs JERKS
A woman basically has 4 types of guys to choose from. There's the nice guy, the jerk, the older man, and the perfect guy.
Nice Guy The nice guy's the one who just pretty much spoils the woman. Example: Buys her gifts, flowers, candy or whatever all the time for no reason. He also doesn't make the decisions, doesn't take charge and lets people walk all over him. In a woman's eye, this guy will make a terrible father. He won't discipline the kids and they will grow up to be out of control brats. Nobody wants a kid like this.
THE JERK The jerk's the guy who takes charge, makes his own decisions and doesn't care if the woman approves or not. In a woman's eye, this guy would make a better father than the nice guy. Who cares if he treats her like crap. A woman thinks he'll change once they have a kid.
OLDER MAN The older man has his life together. This guy would be a great father, except for one thing. In a woman's eye, he's just too old. What good is he going to be in a few years? He might be dead, or won't be physically able to work and support the family. This is not a good risk.
PERFECT GUY The perfect guy's the same as the older guy, except he's much younger and has good looks. The problem here is this guy's a rare find. Hardly any young guy knows how to be this type of man. When a woman does find this type of guy, she'll do everything in her power to get him to marry her as soon as possible. She doesn't want this type of guy to get away.
We know a woman is wired to grow up and start a family. The thing is, she has to choose between these type of guys before she gets too old.
She wants the Perfect Guy, but since she knows her biological clock is ticking, she just can't wait forever to find this rare guy. So, she moves on to her next choice. The Older Man is disqualified for the reason stated earlier. So now she must choose between the Nice Guy or the Jerk.
Since the Nice Guy is just way too soft, this leaves only the Jerk. What other choice was there? She lets herself get pregnant by the jerk and thinks everything will work out just fine. WRONG!! The jerk isn't ready to settle down and start a family. He doesn't want a kid. He just wants to party and enjoy life while he's still young. So now the woman's stuck raising the kid alone. This happens way too much in this day and time.
So what other logical choice of guy did the girl have?
THE NEW CHOICE FOR WOMEN
What's the new choice for women? The new choice is the nice guy, except for a few alterations. The way you become the new choice is by treating your target like she was your own daughter. For example: Let's say you made plans to take your target out for Italian food, but she decides she would rather have Chinese. What do you do? You tell her NO, we're going to have Italian. If she starts whining and getting mad, then you tell her to shut up and be quiet. Don't go get all soft and let her have her own way. You'll fail her test.
By doing this you're showing her two things. First you're displaying the characteristics of a jerk. We all know that's a good thing. Second you're showing her that you'd make a good father who wouldn't let the kids have their way with you. You're showing her that you'll be the man of the house, and what you say...goes!!
So in conclusion of this long post is this tip:
Treat your target like you'd treat your own daughter. You can still be a nice guy and reward her with a gift for doing something good, and you can compliment her for whatever reason. (Just don't overdo it.) The thing is, when she does something that you don't approve of, you CAN'T let her get away with it. A good father wouldn't let his own daughter get away with doing things that are wrong, so why should your target by and different.
Remember, your target's looking for signs of what kind of father you'll be. So being the nice guy who buys gifts just to make her like him, doesn't make decisions, doesn't take charge and doesn't stand up for himself will get you disqualified for a potential mate. YOU LOSE!!
This is just a theory.
[This message has been edited by Surfboard (edited 07-11-2002).]
THE STORY
This story took place about a year ago. My 11 year old niece decides she wants to stay the weekend at my house. My sister tells me that I'm the niece's favorite uncle and she has this little school girl crush on me.
Well, since I didn't want to let my niece down, I agreed to have her spend the weekend at my house. Anyway, the weekend went great. We watched videos, played games and ate whatever we wanted, whenever we wanted. Any kid would've had a good time, being treated like this.
Now for the basis of this post. As I'm about to take her back home, she tells me that I'm TOO NICE and wouldn't make a good father. To this day, the niece hasn't wanted to spend another weekend at my house. So what did I do wrong to go from the favorite uncle, to her not wanting to come over anymore?
THE THEORY
Women are wired to grow up and have babies to keep the species going. They look for the man who'll be able to provide such things as food, shelter and protection. They also look for a man who'll discipline and teach the children right from wrong.
This is where I think I went wrong with my niece. I think she wanted to come to my house not only to have a good time, but to practice her qualifying skills for a potential husband/father. (She's still young, so she doesn't know you're not supposed to marry your own uncle.) If this were the case, then I failed her test miserably. I let her do whatever she wanted. If she wanted to go rent movies, I took her and we got movies. If she wanted ice cream for breakfast, I let her have ice cream for breakfast. In other words, I spoiled her for the entire weekend.
My theory is that women watch how you treat them and think that this is the way you'll treat the kids if you and her were ever to get married and start a family. Since I spoiled her rotten, she was probably thinking that I'd raise the kids in the same manner. SHE DOESN'T WANT THIS. Who'd want their kids to grow up and be spoiled little brats? Not only that, but a spoiled kid would have a tough time in the real world when they get out on their own.
This leads me to the theory on why a woman picks jerks over the nice guys.
MY THEORY ON NICE GUYS vs JERKS
A woman basically has 4 types of guys to choose from. There's the nice guy, the jerk, the older man, and the perfect guy.
Nice Guy The nice guy's the one who just pretty much spoils the woman. Example: Buys her gifts, flowers, candy or whatever all the time for no reason. He also doesn't make the decisions, doesn't take charge and lets people walk all over him. In a woman's eye, this guy will make a terrible father. He won't discipline the kids and they will grow up to be out of control brats. Nobody wants a kid like this.
THE JERK The jerk's the guy who takes charge, makes his own decisions and doesn't care if the woman approves or not. In a woman's eye, this guy would make a better father than the nice guy. Who cares if he treats her like crap. A woman thinks he'll change once they have a kid.
OLDER MAN The older man has his life together. This guy would be a great father, except for one thing. In a woman's eye, he's just too old. What good is he going to be in a few years? He might be dead, or won't be physically able to work and support the family. This is not a good risk.
PERFECT GUY The perfect guy's the same as the older guy, except he's much younger and has good looks. The problem here is this guy's a rare find. Hardly any young guy knows how to be this type of man. When a woman does find this type of guy, she'll do everything in her power to get him to marry her as soon as possible. She doesn't want this type of guy to get away.
We know a woman is wired to grow up and start a family. The thing is, she has to choose between these type of guys before she gets too old.
She wants the Perfect Guy, but since she knows her biological clock is ticking, she just can't wait forever to find this rare guy. So, she moves on to her next choice. The Older Man is disqualified for the reason stated earlier. So now she must choose between the Nice Guy or the Jerk.
Since the Nice Guy is just way too soft, this leaves only the Jerk. What other choice was there? She lets herself get pregnant by the jerk and thinks everything will work out just fine. WRONG!! The jerk isn't ready to settle down and start a family. He doesn't want a kid. He just wants to party and enjoy life while he's still young. So now the woman's stuck raising the kid alone. This happens way too much in this day and time.
So what other logical choice of guy did the girl have?
THE NEW CHOICE FOR WOMEN
What's the new choice for women? The new choice is the nice guy, except for a few alterations. The way you become the new choice is by treating your target like she was your own daughter. For example: Let's say you made plans to take your target out for Italian food, but she decides she would rather have Chinese. What do you do? You tell her NO, we're going to have Italian. If she starts whining and getting mad, then you tell her to shut up and be quiet. Don't go get all soft and let her have her own way. You'll fail her test.
By doing this you're showing her two things. First you're displaying the characteristics of a jerk. We all know that's a good thing. Second you're showing her that you'd make a good father who wouldn't let the kids have their way with you. You're showing her that you'll be the man of the house, and what you say...goes!!
So in conclusion of this long post is this tip:
Treat your target like you'd treat your own daughter. You can still be a nice guy and reward her with a gift for doing something good, and you can compliment her for whatever reason. (Just don't overdo it.) The thing is, when she does something that you don't approve of, you CAN'T let her get away with it. A good father wouldn't let his own daughter get away with doing things that are wrong, so why should your target by and different.
Remember, your target's looking for signs of what kind of father you'll be. So being the nice guy who buys gifts just to make her like him, doesn't make decisions, doesn't take charge and doesn't stand up for himself will get you disqualified for a potential mate. YOU LOSE!!
This is just a theory.
[This message has been edited by Surfboard (edited 07-11-2002).]
