First off, let me start off by saying that I have never divulged my personal life on Internet message boards, but I feel somewhat compelled to tell my story.
I am a senior in college. I have been very successful in school and have been on the Dean’s List a number of times. I have a great family life and don’t have a freaky past or anything like that. I can honestly say that many aspects are perfect and exactly how I want them to be. But recently (past year or so) my life has lacked real friendship. I have plenty of acquaintances at school, but all of my true friends who I have known for years have either moved away or haven’t kept in contact since they went to college. I have never been one to ‘fly solo’ but I do enjoy time to myself where I can do whatever I want and have time for myself.
Also, I have never had a girlfriend, never been kissed and all that other stuff. But I can honestly say that most of it was of my own volition. I can count on my hands the total number of girls that I have been attracted to and really wanted to get to know. If they do not pass my test, I don't go any further with them. I never was a real AFC and always had natural DJ tendencies. There was one girl who I had major oneitis for though, but I am over her now. I got to know her and she was the girl of my dreams, but I ended up in the friends zone with her. I ended up telling her how I really felt about her and immediately cut off all contact with her after that. I see her every now and then, but I doubt that she will think differently of me. I HAVE MOVED ON though, don't think I haven't, but she has been the 'what if' girl for me. (She is the reason I found this site.)
After finding this site, I have found that I have improved myself even more. However, it is not getting a date or number that is the real problem for me, it is the standards that I have that make it tough for me to get to know others. Just recently, there was a girl in one of my classes who at first I said to myself “Man, she looks like a real *****, but she is hot. My goal is to have her eating out of my hand by the time the semester is over.” And you know what, by the end of the semester, I could have easily gone out with her. But I didn’t. I got to know her, and I felt that she wasn’t good enough for me. (I have been told that I tend to be attracted to girls who are stuck up.)
The fact that I have never had a girlfriend doesn’t bother me most of the time, but whenever I sit and think to myself “I should really be out doing something tonight” is when it gets to me. I do have a busy life with hobbies and other things to take care of.
I know that I have a superiority complex and I tend to be stuck up. I have been told that I give off the vibe of being stuck up and ****y and this makes it hard for others to approach me. I am ****y, but I have a great sense of humor as well. I also think to be one of the nicest guys you'll ever want to meet.
I am not bad looking at all either, I recently met some of my dad’s co-workers and they kept on asking me “how many numbers do you get a week?” and “how many girls have you dated?” as if I was some dating god. This is one of many times where I can remember of people telling me how good looking I am. However, most of this comes from women who are at least 30 years old and not girls my age.
I feel the only things that are holding me back from living the life that I want to live are my high standards and lack of real friends.
Has anyone been in this situation? Any tips to get me out of this funk?
Thanks.
(NOTE: I am not complaining, smiply asking for advice. I hope my post doesn't come across as one of those pathetic 'woe is me' posts that pop up every now and then since this is not my intention.)
I am a senior in college. I have been very successful in school and have been on the Dean’s List a number of times. I have a great family life and don’t have a freaky past or anything like that. I can honestly say that many aspects are perfect and exactly how I want them to be. But recently (past year or so) my life has lacked real friendship. I have plenty of acquaintances at school, but all of my true friends who I have known for years have either moved away or haven’t kept in contact since they went to college. I have never been one to ‘fly solo’ but I do enjoy time to myself where I can do whatever I want and have time for myself.
Also, I have never had a girlfriend, never been kissed and all that other stuff. But I can honestly say that most of it was of my own volition. I can count on my hands the total number of girls that I have been attracted to and really wanted to get to know. If they do not pass my test, I don't go any further with them. I never was a real AFC and always had natural DJ tendencies. There was one girl who I had major oneitis for though, but I am over her now. I got to know her and she was the girl of my dreams, but I ended up in the friends zone with her. I ended up telling her how I really felt about her and immediately cut off all contact with her after that. I see her every now and then, but I doubt that she will think differently of me. I HAVE MOVED ON though, don't think I haven't, but she has been the 'what if' girl for me. (She is the reason I found this site.)
After finding this site, I have found that I have improved myself even more. However, it is not getting a date or number that is the real problem for me, it is the standards that I have that make it tough for me to get to know others. Just recently, there was a girl in one of my classes who at first I said to myself “Man, she looks like a real *****, but she is hot. My goal is to have her eating out of my hand by the time the semester is over.” And you know what, by the end of the semester, I could have easily gone out with her. But I didn’t. I got to know her, and I felt that she wasn’t good enough for me. (I have been told that I tend to be attracted to girls who are stuck up.)
The fact that I have never had a girlfriend doesn’t bother me most of the time, but whenever I sit and think to myself “I should really be out doing something tonight” is when it gets to me. I do have a busy life with hobbies and other things to take care of.
I know that I have a superiority complex and I tend to be stuck up. I have been told that I give off the vibe of being stuck up and ****y and this makes it hard for others to approach me. I am ****y, but I have a great sense of humor as well. I also think to be one of the nicest guys you'll ever want to meet.
I am not bad looking at all either, I recently met some of my dad’s co-workers and they kept on asking me “how many numbers do you get a week?” and “how many girls have you dated?” as if I was some dating god. This is one of many times where I can remember of people telling me how good looking I am. However, most of this comes from women who are at least 30 years old and not girls my age.
I feel the only things that are holding me back from living the life that I want to live are my high standards and lack of real friends.
Has anyone been in this situation? Any tips to get me out of this funk?
Thanks.
(NOTE: I am not complaining, smiply asking for advice. I hope my post doesn't come across as one of those pathetic 'woe is me' posts that pop up every now and then since this is not my intention.)