Suggesting a coffee date\meetup a bad move?

[armadon]

Dude you are missing the point. It's not about money or being cheaper it's that guys are taking chicks to coffee shops all the time now. I haven't spent more then 10 bucks on first dates in a couple of years now and I haven't been going to coffee shops.

 

[typical]

Pulling off a coffee date separates the men from the boys. A guy on a coffee date has to rely on his abilities (character, charisma, conversation, etc.), not the venue. It allows him to be his best self completely while determining whether or not the woman merits seeing again at a different venue.

Well said

 

[DonGorgon]

I MAKE IT CLEAR TO HOS THAT THIS AINT A DATE.... I JUST WANY CHILL WITH YOU A MIN. AND GET TO KNOW YOU AND SEE IF YOU ARE COOL OR NOT... yup

 

[Mr. Me]

Mr. Me -> Well, if you take armadon's suggestion and go on a hike with her, at least you can air her nasty ass out to relieve the "odor"

Hey, maybe that's why armadon takes them hiking?

Dude you are missing the point. It's not about money or being cheaper it's that guys are taking chicks to coffee shops all the time now

As for me, I'm not missing your point at all. I completely understand your point. But my questions still remain: what happens if she shows up and she's a psycho? What happens if she's misrepresented herself and weighs 50 pounds more? What if she turns out to be humorless and gives you a hard time? With a meet over coffee, you're out of there fast. With a hike planned, traveling to the hike area and back, you're stuck unless you dump her.

There's pros and cons to everything, and it's just that with the online thing, there's more pros to cons to set up a meet over coffee. And there's lots of women that feel the same way, rather than be stuck uncomfortably with some guy that turns out to be a creep.

As to your point, once mutual chemistry is known, interest is there on both sides and you actually like each other THEN you can move on to the more interesting hiking dates.

 

[DismantleRepair]

Me: Blah blah blah Let me know if you're free to meet and grab a cup of coffee sometime.

Her: Blah blah blah Coffee? Not possible at this time...

Don't tell her "let me know", and don't waffle with "sometime". You're the man, you lead, and don't leave it up to her to decide. Tell her "meet me at x place at x time and we'll have coffee". If she's not free, suggest another time, but don't end up going through with her on every day, that's just lame and will make you look desperate. It might be useful to say you're busy on a day she suggests (even if you aren't), so you can define the when and where on your own terms.