Sudden Urge to Look at Old Flame's IG page

[Willie Naylor]

It's been a while since we stopped hooking up, but over the last few weeks, I've had this urge to look at an old flame's IG. It's just curiosity, I guess. It just hit me all of a sudden recently. I'm resisting the temptation to look at it, but I'm starting to get weak.

Any of you guys ever been tempted to look up/contact an ex? How'd you handle it?

 

[Billtx49]

You can blame it on curiosity, but it’s an attempt to relive the past or see who came out on top. The problem arises when you look and discover she’s having a great time with someone else.
The past should be put to rest for eternity, it can’t be changed now.

 

[2Rocky]

Ha, I've got a few exes as friends on social media. Granted it was 10 years after I'd been married and social media was a new thing.

Don't checkout exes, unless you have your romantic life where you want it.

 

[mjb3617]

You can blame it on curiosity, but it’s an attempt to relive the past. The problem arises when you look and discover she’s having a great time with someone else.
The past should be put to rest for eternity, it can’t be changed now.

I'd feel sorry for whoever my ex is having a great time with.

I'll be honest in that I have the desire to reach out to my ex lately. Mainly because I want to show off how different I am since we last saw each other. I know she wouldn't give two ****s, but I guess part of my ego wants to show her she didn't get the best of me and I'm not heartbroken over her.

I haven't done it and most likely won't. It wouldn't have any positive benefit at all.

 

[CAPSLOCK BANDIT]

The secret to these feelings is understanding that often, people we feel a way about, feel the same way, it's ego and communication that get into the way, so if your not fully ready to reexplore whatever you had, do not even look... Obviously this rule is about people you've been with, Taylor Swift is not thinking about me and if she is well I don't need some down bad chick in my life

 

[Zimbabwe]

I'd feel sorry for whoever my ex is having a great time with.

I'll be honest in that I have the desire to reach out to my ex lately. Mainly because I want to show off how different I am since we last saw each other. I know she wouldn't give two ****s, but I guess part of my ego wants to show her she didn't get the best of me and I'm not heartbroken over her.

I haven't done it and most likely won't. It wouldn't have any positive benefit at all.

I actually tried to do this with my EX, it felt good but I don't think she could care less and she ended up blocking me.

 

[mjb3617]

The secret to these feelings is understanding that often, people we feel a way about, feel the same way, it's ego and communication that get into the way, so if your not fully ready to reexplore whatever you had, do not even look... Obviously this rule is about people you've been with, Taylor Swift is not thinking about me and if she is well I don't need some down bad chick in my life

I'd like to believe that is the case with my ex but I highly doubt it.

 

[CAPSLOCK BANDIT]

I'd like to believe that is the case with my ex but I highly doubt it.

It's difficult to separate desire and comfort, only one is worth chasing, the other leads to complacency and total failure as a result

 

[mjb3617]

It's difficult to separate desire and comfort, only one is worth chasing, the other leads to complacency and total failure as a result

Definitely wouldn't do it for comfort. What I've learned since we ended things, is I can't seek a woman for comfort.

Now if she wants to smash ok

 

[2Rocky]

So I still see my children's mother every week since we alternate weeks with my youngest. She is still a bitter, spiteful, resting ***** face, etc.

It has been nearly 6 years since I dropped the bomb on her. We can talk about our child's sports, and hobbies and she will smile and laugh at a joke every now and then. She ended up getting diagnosed with an autoimmune disease a few years ago and is managing it the best she can. She doesn't seem to be involved with anyone. I think she really appreciates how much my LTR mothers our daughter. I think it takes pressure off of her.

The last few months she has been delivering my daughter to me the night before the exchange morning. I'm not sure whose idea it was but my girlfriend really likes having a kid to mother.

Honestly if my ex called me up and wanted to have sex, I wouldn't even consider it for a second.

 

[firstbornunicorn]

I have two of my exes as "close friends" on IG. There is genuinely no flame anymore and I genuinely like seeing them happy no matter who they're with. I broke up with them though, if that changes anything.

 

[Glassguy]

There is a reason why we take the trash out and leave it there. It has no good purpose in your living area.

 

[EyeOnThePrize]

It's been a while since we stopped hooking up, but over the last few weeks, I've had this urge to look at an old flame's IG. It's just curiosity, I guess. It just hit me all of a sudden recently. I'm resisting the temptation to look at it, but I'm starting to get weak.

Any of you guys ever been tempted to look up/contact an ex? How'd you handle it?

Every time I have an urge to contact an ex or old fling or look at their socials, I take it as a sign that my life has stagnated a bit, and double down on trying new things, meeting new people, lifting more weight, etc. It's never failed to improve my quality of life. Besides, that's yesterday pus$y.

 

[Willie Naylor]

Every time I have an urge to contact an ex or old fling or look at their socials, I take it as a sign that my life has stagnated a bit, and double down on trying new things, meeting new people, lifting more weight, etc. It's never failed to improve my quality of life. Besides, that's yesterday pus$y.

Good way to look at it. Thanks.

 

[twelveightyone]

I think it's better to unfriend/unfollow once you break it off so that you won't see pictures of them.

 

[Willie Naylor]

I think it's better to unfriend/unfollow once you break it off so that you won't see pictures of them.

I never follow/add women I'm seeing on social media.

I've decided to not look at her IG page.

 

[MissouriMark]

It's been a while since we stopped hooking up, but over the last few weeks, I've had this urge to look at an old flame's IG. It's just curiosity, I guess. It just hit me all of a sudden recently. I'm resisting the temptation to look at it, but I'm starting to get weak.

Any of you guys ever been tempted to look up/contact an ex? How'd you handle it?

I thought you mentioned in another post that you were currently married?

 

[Willie Naylor]

I thought you mentioned in another post that you were currently married?

Dating. Still have (had) the urge to check out what she's up to.

 

[rjc149]

All human beings crave connection and attachment to others. It starts with our primary caregivers, then extends to our lovers. This is why our parenting forms out attachment styles, which becomes the template for our romantic relationships. We all want connection, and we all feel we must restore that connection when it’s broken — in primal settings, broken connections with caregivers meant death.

By checking up on an ex, this is your mind wanting to restore the connection you had to her. It doesn’t always mean you still have feelings for her (although it often does) but it’s an innate, primal urge you have. Don’t be ashamed of it.

I still check up on ex’s. Long lost ones too, from college. I try not to, but I’m not always successful and I don’t need to be. I’m human.

 

[Modern Man Advice]

It's been a while since we stopped hooking up, but over the last few weeks, I've had this urge to look at an old flame's IG. It's just curiosity, I guess. It just hit me all of a sudden recently. I'm resisting the temptation to look at it, but I'm starting to get weak.

Any of you guys ever been tempted to look up/contact an ex? How'd you handle it?

Don't. It is called self-discipline. You need to be in control of your urges and not the other way around.

Needless to say, what possible good can come out of that?


Modern Man Advice