SUCK at talking to women!! :( Help!

[sportf190]

Ok so I have had sex with about 20+ women I am 23 years old but have realized I definitely am terrible still at talking to women and want to work on my game with that. Just yesterday I see an older lady with two kids and I was at starbucks reading a book, so she is smiling at me and I say Hey and she goes inside then sits right near my table. Anyways about 5 minutes into it I look back and her kids are eating a cookie and she says like I have to deal with this all night jokingly, so i say something like you need to get out now don't ya? and she smiles then looks back, without saying any thing else then leaves after 20 minutes. I tried to say something after but she seemed uninterested.... Maybe I came on too strong right away? Problem Is I just suck at talking and need to work on it with everyone, Any advice? I am sick of ruining it with so many girls because I don't know what to say and end up saying something stupid

 

[FairShake]

so i say something like you need to get out now don't ya?

That doesn't even make sense.

Talk to them like a friend. I realize that goes against everything they tell you here but if you can't talk to them like a friend you definitely can't talk to them like a player. You need that stepping stone and I highly recommend you use it. You will understand them better too.

 

[sportf190]

yea but I figure if the kids are annoying I said something like you need to get out more don't ya to open? how doesn't that make sense? lol what would you have said?

 

[FairShake]

The first thing that comes to mind is something along the lines "Remember, just repeat to yourself, they'll take care of me when I'm older." Or maybe "at least they'll give you cute grandchildren."

Granted, you'd need to be talking to the right kind of woman with a sense of humor and you need to make it clear you're joking.

But more often than not I'd just make a sympathetic comment about how my daughter was the same way and how she grew out of it. Then we'll strike up a conversation about family which is one of the easiest things for me to talk about.

 

[Tryingtoimprove]

The first thing that comes to mind is something along the lines "Remember, just repeat to yourself, they'll take care of me when I'm older." Or maybe "at least they'll give you cute grandchildren."

Granted, you'd need to be talking to the right kind of woman with a sense of humor and you need to make it clear you're joking.

But more often than not I'd just make a sympathetic comment about how my daughter was the same way and how she grew out of it. Then we'll strike up a conversation about family which is one of the easiest things for me to talk about.

These are some good lines but I think the OP's problem is more that he clearly wouldn't be able to think of good lines like those on the fly that were appropriate to the situation.

OP I think you need to read more. You see how fairshake, who can come up with funny and fitting lines, speaks with proper and understandable grammar whereas we have to decipher everything you write?

The first step to learning how to speak to women is learning how to speak period.

 

[gspshields2]

Ok so I have had sex with about 20+ women I am 23 years old but have realized I definitely am terrible still at talking to women and want to work on my game with that. Just yesterday I see an older lady with two kids and I was at starbucks reading a book, so she is smiling at me and I say Hey and she goes inside then sits right near my table. Anyways about 5 minutes into it I look back and her kids are eating a cookie and she says like I have to deal with this all night jokingly, so i say something like you need to get out now don't ya? and she smiles then looks back, without saying any thing else then leaves after 20 minutes. I tried to say something after but she seemed uninterested.... Maybe I came on too strong right away? Problem Is I just suck at talking and need to work on it with everyone, Any advice? I am sick of ruining it with so many girls because I don't know what to say and end up saying something stupid

Maybe she felt it was awkward you were tying to hit on her in front of her kids?

 

[FairShake]

These are some good lines but I think the OP's problem is more that he clearly wouldn't be able to think of good lines like those on the fly that were appropriate to the situation.

OP I think you need to read more. You see how fairshake, who can come up with funny and fitting lines, speaks with proper and understandable grammar whereas we have to decipher everything you write?

The first step to learning how to speak to women is learning how to speak period.

Those lines come because I'm a family man who has talked with alot of moms in my time. Which is why marble mouth needs to talk as a friend first, player later. If you've had lots of conversations with people in your life these things just come to you. Hell, you can probably steal them after awhile.

Edit: I am a big supporter of listening. It's funny how much your conversation skills will improve by shutting up and listening. Your conversation skills will not be the only thing either...

http://artofmanliness.com/2012/05/02/how-to-listen-effectively/

 

[ilikecharlene]

Women are people. I don't see why one can be comfortable taking to a man, but not a woman.

 

[ka_mate]

Women are people. I don't see why one can be comfortable taking to a man, but not a woman.

I can. Have you noticed how a lot of guys struggle to approach women but will exchange words with another guy at the bar without even thinking about it.

Hey OP I am intrigued, how have you gotten into bed with these 20+ women if you believe you can't talk that well with women?

 

[ilikecharlene]

I think men are socially conditioned to behave that way, it's not natural IMO.

 

[Maxtro]

Ok so I have had sex with about 20+ women I am 23 years old but have realized I definitely am terrible still at talking to women

So nobody caught this?

How the fuck can you have sex with 20+ women and not be able to hold a conversation?

 

[ka_mate]

So nobody caught this?

How the fuck can you have sex with 20+ women and not be able to hold a conversation?

I caught this Maxtro and I too am keenly awaiting OP's strategy of laying women without holding conversations.

 

[juicywa]

speculations:

a. He is good looking (or some sort of social proof)
b. He fvcks ugly chicks
c. Prostitutes

 

[LittleBigOne]

Talk to them like a friend. I realize that goes against everything they tell you here but if you can't talk to them like a friend you definitely can't talk to them like a player. You need that stepping stone and I highly recommend you use it. You will understand them better too.

This is an important advice.

First of all it´s just a talk, you do not need anything from the woman which you don´t even know yet.

Observe the woman and think about these words: Why, Where, How, Who. You use them normally in questions. Another great thing is to ask an opinion like do you prefer coffee or tea...and Why is that...When did you learn to drink coffee...Who learned you to drink coffee etc etc.

When you keep this in mind and just relax you can have great conversations with any woman you want. And oh yes, make the conversation more spicey at some moment by disagreeing with something she says. For example when she says ´i hate my brother for being a jerk´ you can say ´i think you care a lot of your brother´. It really helps, don´t forget to show a sense for humor as well.

 

[LittleBigOne]

Ok so I have had sex with about 20+ women

Nobody over here needs to know.

Last tip: Don´t brag in conversations

 

[gspshields2]

Why are you hitting on a housewife in front of her kids?

 

[corrector]

Ha! This guy is playing you all and you all believe him. He is not replying to anyone's post asking him how he slept with 20 women when he can't have a conversation with anyone. Doubt anyone on here would brag about prostitutes or would think a prostitute would count.

So, what is this guy's secret? If he's good looking the women would be worrying about the conversation part...they'd want to chat him up, lol!

What's the other one...uglies?

Real problem, can sleep with women but don't know how to talk to them, lol!

 

[Shockwavedave]

20+ woman and don't think you are good at talking to them...Yowzer! Just imagine how much laying you'll do when you get proficient at talking with women!!

 

[perseverance]

20+ woman and don't think you are good at talking to them...Yowzer! Just imagine how much laying you'll do when you get proficient at talking with women!!

I know right! It's so crazy!

OP, seriously dude, 99.9% of attractive women without make up are just your average plain Jane, remember this when you see them. Women have endless amounts of 'beauty enhancing' products to make them look the way they do. They're just human beings whose excrement smells as bad as yours and they have weak points like you do. Just talk to them as a friend, I agree with Fairshake.

I seem to be attracting a lot more women since I have learned this valuable lesson and of course there is no pressure on me whatsoever, so it's a win-win situation.