Subconcious mind and experience.

Joined
May 23, 2006
Messages
2,436
Reaction score
11
I'm reviewing the locked thread "Help Skywalker get laid before 31 y/o" and am reviewing B-lemmon's idea of making positive affirmations. I'm going to start working on this to see if there is any effective change within the next 2 weeks to a month and evaluating it.

I find, that usually if I feel something is 'unjust' and I feel very strongly about something, that something usually balances out to remedy what I feel strongly about.

For example, in the past, I never actually succeeded in getting a casual hookup from the internet, however, this year I did, because I felt something 'unjust' happened to me with a crush who I believed slept with another guy but did not want to kiss me and it undermined my feelings as a man.

Just after this, I had four casual hook-ups from the net I could of pursued if I wanted to, and I actually meet a few people where I kissed them for the first time in my life.

On of the interesting features is there was a clear sense of purpose where I am trying to remedy what I perceive to be an injustice against myself based 'every girl rejecting me', etc... when there was a clear focus and direction to remedy this, by seeking a kiss at the end of the first date, or whatever, and I kissed girls at the end of the first date for the first time.

The key for affirmations to work, or a sense that it is working is to deal with things that would be considered 'unjust', like, it's unjust that I cant just go up to a hb and talk to her without analyzing, or grope a girl without thinking I'll be ending up in jail or losing my job when I could be having fun, etc..... I mean.

Anyway....back to the affirmations - trying it for a few weeks or so, hope they work in time.
 

Call_Me_Daddy

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 28, 2006
Messages
1,372
Reaction score
7
Luke Skywalker said:
Anyway....back to the affirmations - trying it for a few weeks or so, hope they work in time.
Affirmations are best used twice a day. Before sleep and upon waking. 20 min of repetition daily. Also, its best not to make the affirmations too 'far out' there. For exapmle:

Good affirmation: I keep a gym schedule everyday.
Bad Affirmation: I always go to the gym because I will be totally ripped.

One is more unrealistic then the other. Its too much to handle subconciously. Its best to start more conservative and as that afformation comes true (going to gym religiously), you slowly change it. Keeping the affirmation just one step ahead of you. A goal just always a littie bit beyond your reach.




This is what I have found to work good. Read Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill. There's way more info in there than you think.

Good luck.

See ya. Not coming back for a few months, or ever if I don't really feel like it. God speed Luke.
 

Quiksilver

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 30, 2006
Messages
2,853
Reaction score
55
Originally posted by Call Me Daddy
A goal just always a littie bit beyond your reach.
Interesting, I'll pick that book up sometime.
 
Joined
May 23, 2006
Messages
2,436
Reaction score
11
First day trying this crap out and I think that I have come across even more creepier than usual with most of my interactions today, (or maybe it's in the mind). I dont know if these affirmations could also have the opposite effect, because you are putting your mind into noticing things that you would not normally which you have no control over anyway.

For example, affirming that women find your charm and charisma irresistable would make you feel more self-concious about your lack of charm and charisma then actually re-program you do have charm and charisma.

I dont think you can self-hypnotise yourself so that your personality changes to be more attractive to the opposite sex - for example, I cant grope women in my office and start affirming that women love me to touch them - that sounds like a recipe for disaster.

I'd like to know if people actually believe in this crap, of it's really just psychobabble nonsence.
 

What happens, IN HER MIND, is that she comes to see you as WORTHLESS simply because she hasn't had to INVEST anything in you in order to get you or to keep you.

You were an interesting diversion while she had nothing else to do. But now that someone a little more valuable has come along, someone who expects her to treat him very well, she'll have no problem at all dropping you or demoting you to lowly "friendship" status.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Joined
May 23, 2006
Messages
2,436
Reaction score
11
The_Wolf said:
Affirmation..?
It's in the beginning of the blocked thread - "Help Skywalker get laid before he turns 31" - a poster, B-lemmen, brought up the idea (certainly not a new one), that by repeating certain things, you can program your subconcious mind so you'll be more successful with women. It seems certain subconcious and unconcious orientations may effect our lives, and if it's a bad orientation, it may be responsible for lack of success with the ladies.

Thus, by repeating certain mantras (i.e. I'm good with the ladies, etc...) a few times a day, then it registeres into the subconcious mind, and you become what you think.

Biblically, the book of proverbs does say 'as a man thinketh, so is he', so you eventually become what you think, for better or for worst.


My contention is that affirmations make you self-concious against what you are affirming rather than making you become what you are affirming.
 

Desdinova

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 15, 2004
Messages
11,639
Reaction score
4,718
What I did was look in the mirror and tell myself the affirmations. I'd say things like "I'm a goddam sexy motherfvcker!" Look at the good things about yourself when you look in the mirror. Talk to your reflection like you're talking to another human being. I think it's more powerful when you tell yourself things face to face.
 

Call_Me_Daddy

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 28, 2006
Messages
1,372
Reaction score
7
Luke Skywalker said:
First day trying this crap out and I think that I have come across even more creepier than usual with most of my interactions today, (or maybe it's in the mind). I dont know if these affirmations could also have the opposite effect, because you are putting your mind into noticing things that you would not normally which you have no control over anyway.
I just had to post something.

These affirmatins take time pal. That wasn't because of the 'affirmations' that you are creepy. You're creepy because you're creepy. End of story.

That's like driking a coffee one time (you've never had coffee in your life) and then you go get a doctor's appointment and he finds out you have very high blood pressure.

Did the one coffee do it? Hell no. You can blame that one 'damned' coffee all you want, but its not going to change anything. Plus, makes you look like a complete fool.

One affirmation one time does not do jack. That's why it has to be repeated over and over.

For example, affirming that women find your charm and charisma irresistable would make you feel more self-concious about your lack of charm and charisma then actually re-program you do have charm and charisma.
That's not how you make affirmations.

Bad: "My Charm and Charisma is Important to women." (this is what you wrote above)
Good: "I am charming and charismatic."

See the diference? If you don't chances are you shouldn't be using affirmations. Affirmations have to be short and sweet. Also very direct. No big, complex words.

I dont think you can self-hypnotise yourself so that your personality changes to be more attractive to the opposite sex - for example, I cant grope women in my office and start affirming that women love me to touch them - that sounds like a recipe for disaster.
Blah blah blah blah. More negative bull****. I can't do that, I'll never be able to do that, I'm a loser... etc. Do you see what I wrote? Those are all affirmations. Negative ones.

Pessimism will get you nowhere. You're living proof.

I'd like to know if people actually believe in this crap, of it's really just psychobabble nonsence.
LOL. And the Kettle called the teapot black. Nice, you're saying this is psychobable.

Look, this is a great tool. Plenty of people have used this and have accomplished their goals. You don't want to use it? That's fine, but take your negative psychobable elsewhere. Go be all negative and pessimistic of everything by yourself and don't bring any of it here.

This board is meant to help people. There are the ocassinal insults and **** flying around but I've never seen as much consistent pessimism from anyone else here, except you.

:trouble:


In conclusion: Don't bother using affirmations anyway. You're far too pesimistic and these affirmations also require some faith. Faith in yourself and the ability that you can do what you affirm everyday.

You obviously have no faith. In anything. And don't bring up any religious garbage either. You don't even have any faith in that either. Its just your ego that wants to avoid 'eternal damnation' and other myths. You pretend.

You really need some therapy. Looks to me like your beyond self-help Luke. If you got any money saved up, now would be the best time. Consider it an investment in yourself. Do yourself a favour and see a psychiatrist, daily affirmations may not do it for you.


-CMD Signing out. Going to someplace a little less dark and hopeless.
 

Marseille

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 22, 2007
Messages
14
Reaction score
0
Location
London town
Sorry, this is my first post, but could someone please elaborate on what an affrimation is? Thanks.

Is it simply you keep have to repeat to yourself with? Is there not danger of this affirmation becoming more bad than good.? Surely if you think about something to much, you will become more obsessed with the affirmation, than actually trying to acheive your goal of getting laid.
 

Socialreject

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Oct 9, 2005
Messages
409
Reaction score
4
I think you're tackling the right obstacles here!

What you need to do, and what you are doing, is changing beliefs that you've formed in the past and which are self limiting and defeating in nature. The difference between failing because you screwed up and failing because you've never tried can be found in the nature of such beliefs.

I think that once you've progressed a ways with this, you'll find the 'real you' coming out instead of staying inside, and your game is going to start developing naturally. Experience tells me that game usually presents itself once a person can really be himself.

There is NO reason why we wouldn't be curious about strangers who seem interesting. There is NO reason why we wouldn't seek contact with women who intrigue or attrack us. There is NO reason why we would go out on a limb for a woman and play her sh1t games.

Yet these simply facts that i think anyone can agree on can seem the most difficult things to understand as long as you have self limiting and defeating beliefs.
 

Don't always be the one putting yourself out for her. Don't always be the one putting all the effort and work into the relationship. Let her, and expect her, to treat you as well as you treat her, and to improve the quality of your life.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Joined
May 23, 2006
Messages
2,436
Reaction score
11
Call_Me_Daddy said:
I just had to post something.

These affirmatins take time pal. That wasn't because of the 'affirmations' that you are creepy. You're creepy because you're creepy. End of story.
Maybe so, but the fact is I wasn't bothered about it or noticed it until I start making these affirmations, which is why I'm thinking it's making me feel self-concious.

Call_Me_Daddy said:
One affirmation one time does not do jack. That's why it has to be repeated over and over.
Sure, you've tried this? How many times did you have to repeat it to work? How many affirmations did you use?

Call_Me_Daddy said:
That's not how you make affirmations.

Bad: "My Charm and Charisma is Important to women." (this is what you wrote above)
Good: "I am charming and charismatic."
I'm using a set of affirmations from B-Lemmon's post, which are in the proper form as you have demonstrated above. There is a whole list of them.

Call_Me_Daddy said:
Look, this is a great tool. Plenty of people have used this and have accomplished their goals.
Sure, and I'm doing searches for threads trying to find positive testimonials about them, where they have made a marked, measurable difference within a specific time period.

Call_Me_Daddy said:
You don't want to use it?
I did not say that. I'm merely accounting for the first day that I'm trying it.

Call_Me_Daddy said:
That's fine, but take your negative psychobable elsewhere. Go be all negative and pessimistic of everything by yourself and don't bring any of it here.
I think you are the one whose being negative around here. I'm writing a report of what results I've got trying this out and seeking advice on if I'm doing something wrong, or how this is supposed to work. If you want to start a flame war on this then I think you are the one that's messed up and needs therapy.
 
Joined
May 23, 2006
Messages
2,436
Reaction score
11
Socialreject said:
I think you're tackling the right obstacles here!

What you need to do, and what you are doing, is changing beliefs that you've formed in the past and which are self limiting and defeating in nature. The difference between failing because you screwed up and failing because you've never tried can be found in the nature of such beliefs.
So, these affirmations work best where failure is linked in failure to try rather than failure due to screwing up?

Socialreject said:
I think that once you've progressed a ways with this, you'll find the 'real you' coming out instead of staying inside, and your game is going to start developing naturally. Experience tells me that game usually presents itself once a person can really be himself.
Have you tried affirmations yourself? Did this help your inner game in the way you are describing above?

Socialreject said:
Yet these simply facts that i think anyone can agree on can seem the most difficult things to understand as long as you have self limiting and defeating beliefs.
So - you find these affirmations helpful at dealing with self limiting and defeating beliefs?
 
Joined
May 23, 2006
Messages
2,436
Reaction score
11
I've followed Desinova's concept and have repeated the affirmations face-to-face in a mirror.

I'm reading from a list of like 60 affirmations on B-lemmon's thread:
http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=103116 and it's overwhelming going through so many affirmations at one time.

However a couple of affirmation stook out over the others on the last repetition:

1) I make no excuse for myself as a man, and I'm INNOSCENT, not guilty.
2) I make no excuses for my desires as a man.

I didn't feel as creepy as I did when I first started - but I'm still the same old me with these affirmations or so I feel, but I'm still going to continue trying.

Well, at the very least, positive meditations or statements feel good.
 
Top