Stop Reading Into Body And Spoken Language

[BramhaBull60]

I feel real bad for the newbies in this forum. I remember when I used to agonize over why this girl did this or that or what she meant by saying this, and it would drive me nuts. Eventually I just got sick of reading them, and approached women, went for a number, and did not trust a reaction until she gets phyiscally involved with me.

Thats the only way to truely now what a women thinks of you. If she is all over you phyiscally. A long drawn out courtship is just not the way the world works anymore( if it ever did), especially if you are not stunningly attractive.

Whats the worst that can happen if you take things with a girl to the next level through controling the situation and having her spend time with to going for the kiss, to bringing her home and getting some tang? She says no? Better than wasting time wondering what she meant by saying shed like to see your dorm room or apartment.

The sad truth is, if you have not done anything physically with an HB that you have approached for more than a week, your dead in the water: Either she is not interested or she is going to put you through the ringer. So instead of asking people on this forum( does she like me or not because she licked her lips) take action, and find out for yourself.

 

[johnny_chase]

YES! FINALLY! I'm not the only one remotely frustrated with some of the posts here. Read this! Read it all! Go read it again!

 

[defiancy]

Certainly True!
The obvious truth is revealed once again

Body language should never be the first priority when seducing

 

[Vincent]

Originally posted by defiancy
Certainly True!
The obvious truth is revealed once again

Body language should never be the first priority when seducing

Uhm, I just have one question...



WHAT?!

 

[Wiesman44]

I couldnt agree more with the original poster. I know I'm guilty of all that sh$t you said. I'm just going to stop bothering to analyze what they say and how they react and ask them the fu*k out. Ya, if I've thrown my best game at someone and they're still cold as ice i'll stay away. But for all the newbies out there, if you're not sure about her IL based on body or spoken language, just go for it. You only live once.

But defiancy, body language DOES matter when seducing someone. Its an important part of the deal. But if she's throwing mixed signals, just go for the # or ask her out. Not all women react the same.

 

[Sexy_Malibu]

But... but... what do you think he REALLY means by that?

 

[huge_guy_pimpin]

wow, foolish, u gotta read body language to understand her, and no posting here isnt part of that, nonetheless it is important.

 

[DJDamage]

ANOTHER THING TO ADD:

Instead of asking What does this mean when a chick is doing something, you will never find out the truth from us because everything all of us are telling you is speculation based upon our experience.

Your situation belongs to you and only you. Therefore the only sure way to find out if she is giving you a sign or not is ASK HER PHONE NUMBER AND THEN CALL HER AND ASK HER OUT! SIMPLE ISN"T IT? YOU WILL KNOW PRETTY FAST IF YOU ARE IN OR OUT!

ONCE YOU DO THAT, YOU WILL CLEAR ALL THE B.S AND THE LITTLE QUESTIONS OF "DOES SHE LIKE ME OR NOT?"

 

[jakethasnake]

It's beautiful how simple it can be, isn't it? Remember, you only make things tough for yourself. You can just as easily make thing easy for yourself.

 

[Vincent]

Originally posted by Wiesman44
I couldnt agree more with the original poster. I know I'm guilty of all that sh$t you said. I'm just going to stop bothering to analyze what they say and how they react and ask them the fu*k out. Ya, if I've thrown my best game at someone and they're still cold as ice i'll stay away. But for all the newbies out there, if you're not sure about her IL based on body or spoken language, just go for it. You only live once.

But defiancy, body language DOES matter when seducing someone. Its an important part of the deal. But if she's throwing mixed signals, just go for the # or ask her out. Not all women react the same.

Thats actually a really good point...

Get the number and it'll throw her off, shows you aren't thrown by her lack of interest and/or mixed signals.

 

[defiancy]

I know body language is important...what else did u think i mean? I'm just saying sometimes it isn't true and body language shouldn't be assumed as a sign of attraction all the time..especially from AWs

So we go for the numbers
If i was vague ..my bad

 

[Kaine]

I think the message here is to err on the side of action. The whole ignore body language thing was a red herring.

 

[mistyc]

Presence of positive body language signals = good
Presence of negative body language signals (like running away) = bad

Absence of positive body language signals = means nothing
Absence of negative body language signals = means nothing.

Look for what's there and accept it for what it is without overanalyzing.. That's what he meant imo. And when in doubt, don't come crying to us, take action and get your real answer - which is better than agonizing for days whether or not she likes you while you hear all our contradicting answers.

 

[BramhaBull60]

"Look for what's there and accept it for what it is without overanalyzing.. That's what he meant imo. And when in doubt, don't come crying to us, take action and get your real answer - which is better than agonizing for days whether or not she likes you while you hear all our contradicting answers."

Thats exactly what I meant MistyC. I have been guilty as anyone asking for second opinion's about how a girl acts, and I get fifty different awnser. My whole point was to take the skills you learn, keep plugging away, and know that the only real awnser to how far you getting with a girl is when you jump each others bones, in either your or her apartment, and she can't let you alone. Thats the true gauge for interest level, at when you first start seeing a girl. To many guys watch those hollywood melodramas about the dorky guy getting the girl in the end, and think thats how it works, so they ask people in this forum to tell them that " "Yes she wants me because she complimented my shirt " or " She's in love with you because she said hello and smiled to me" because they want to believe the girl is in love with them instead of just, actually liking the shirt or being friendly. Those delusions happend to me, probably happend to all of you. I am just wising up as I learn more from all of you over the years.

 

[One on One]

I was reading a book the other day and it said something that really hit home and adds to this point:


Compare yourself to a thermostat. The thermostat checks the temperature of the room and then decides if it should be heated or cooled. It would like to make the room 70 degrees at all times, but you're going to have to settle for a range of 68-72 degrees otherwise the thermostat will be constantly switching between heat and cold and break itself. You can't have your feedback mechanism wound too tight There's gotta be some room for error in there or else you'll break.

Secondly, the thermometer that checks the temp of the room isn't always 100% accurate. It's probably 98% accurate. You can increase that to 99% by adding another thermometer that is another feedback mechanism for the first thermometer, but you'll still not going to be 100% accurate.


Two lessons from this:

1. There are no right answers. The temperature (ie. your decisions on what to do in "situations") is a range, not a definitive answer. You're paralyzing yourself trying to find the exact right thing to do in a situation just as the thermostat does when it tries to make the room EXACTLY 70 degrees.

2. Your feedback mechanism (ie. your brain) is not ALWAYS going to be right and never will be, regardless of how many people you consult. That's why they say to trust your instincts. The first thermometer is CLOSE ENOUGH. You don't need additional thermometers to check the temperature.



I hope I explained that analogy correctly because the book did it a lot better, but I think it sums up everything we need to know.


Paralysis by Over-Analysis!!!

 

[sapphire]

In other words your first gut reaction is usually accurate.

I can see how this is true in the context of guaging a girl's interest. At first you think she likes you. It could be because of her body language and signals that you as a man instinctually pick up on through thousands of years of evolution, but then your thought processes kick in and you start analyzing the situation and question her interest which then leads to hesitation and the natural flow of things is then interrupted.

 

[frivolousz21]

KISS HER IF SHE KISSES BACK THEN SHE LIKES U!!!!!

STICK IN HER..IF SHE CALLS YOU BIG MAN AND GOES OAAAHHHHHH! THEN SHE LIKES YOU!


YEAH! I can anaylize!!!!!!

 

[BramhaBull60]

" Paralysis by Over-Analysis!!! "

I like that One on One. That summed up everything I tried to say in one word. I also like the temputure analogy. The human mind can play tricks on you. One of my major weaknesses is that I over anyalyze everything, so I have learned to just simplify by not trying to read people. Its a skill I use in my job to( sales). People are irrational( women more so) and chaotic, and their reactions are random. They will lie through their teeth to you to be polite or nice or to use you, so I should close people in a short window of time or just forget about that prospect. That keeps me working for new leads, and eliminating BS that wastes my time. It works well in dating to. Keep the prospects that treat me well and give me what I want, discard the those who are full of ****.

 

[A-Unit]

Clarification.

Body language doesn't matter.
It doesn't.
Why?

Because...why are we strategizing every move with a girl? If you're thinking, how can you be acting?

If you're planning moves so strategically, is it possible she doesn't like you that much? Why do you have to resort to such desperate measures?

In sales, which is much akin to dating, there's 2 important pieces:

1. Listening.
2. Asking good questions.

What seducing and interpreting body language is is attempting to GLOSS THE PRESENTATION SO WELL, SO THAT YOU SELL THEM ON THEM FEATURES, and NOT THE BENEFITS.

When it's all about you and your happiness, shouldn't she be reading you to see if you like her?

If I had a pie-chart up, that broke down your days average time, it'd be something like this...

8hours - sleep
8hours - school/work
2hours - lifting (gym, changing)
2hours - eating (breakfast, lunch, dinner & prep)
1hours - bathroom time/showering

There's 7 hours left. Now...I'm not sure what else is left, but I know the days are tighter than that for most. I don't have the *time* to be reading, contemplating, or planning my move with a girl.

One on One is right as well.

For me, the best way to find out if a girl is something I'd like is to act on *my terms*. If she doesn't react to what I say or do, then I give it a few more chances and move on.

Attraction vs Seduction.

Attraction every time.



A-Unit

 

[A-Unit]

Re: Correction.

There's 4 hours left.

Not nearly enough time to be debating girls, their moves, and so forth. Time that could be used learning about nutrition, reading, hanging with friends, or family, is spent learning how to seduce women. A big waste in my book.


A-Unit