Still haven't kissed. Make a move or move on?

[jc_80]

Really can't believe I'm asking this haha.

Been talkin to this chick for a month. Been over to her house four times now and stayed up all night talking. Went out to dinner once and she insisted on paying. She's really interesting and we have so much in common. But something about her is just weird. She says she's only been with one guy from a 6 year relationship and it's been a long time, that she's very selective and ends up meeting all the weirdos, and catching and std worries her. This isn't too surprising considering this one came from online dating.

Anyways, she sends no signal whatsoever that she's down for physical contact. If I sit on the couch then she sits on the other couch. I've touched her a few times taking about her hair or nails and it didn't loosen her up much. Everytime I leave I'm thinking I should just make a move and see what happens but it just doesn't feel right. And she's told me stories about guys trying to grope her like I'm supposed to take the hint she's not ready or I'm supposed to just go for it and it's a confidence test? That's just not my style. I like when they're getting flirty and the tension builds.

Im supposed to let her know a time to go out this week. I'm hoping getting her out of her house will change things up and give us the right moment if she's that hard to turn on. But I'm getting really bored with her unfortunately. I have two plates I'm actually sleeping with so I feel like why bother anymore. But I do like her. She's very self sufficient and has a gorgeous face, very compatible other than this issue.

Any tips? Assume she's not interested or just a stiff and move on? Or just go for it or find some way to get her thinkng about it?

 

[bmp2cpm]

The important question is how many other women are you kissing? This woman appears to be hogging much of your valuable resources with no kind of payout in site.

Your valuable resources should only be used on women that will give you what you want. This girl is preventing you from hooking up with other women and giving you nothing in return. Time is a very valuable resource. Start treating it as such.

 

[GS750]

you are in the friendzone. Since you didn't make your interest/intent known early on, if you did make a move at this point you'd likely get rejected. trying to talk to her about it will get you nowhere. so you either need to amp up the kino, making your sexual intent known through behavior...or you need to eject.

 

[jc_80]

you are in the friendzone. Since you didn't make your interest/intent known early on, if you did make a move at this point you'd likely get rejected. trying to talk to her about it will get you nowhere. so you either need to amp up the kino, making your sexual intent known through behavior...or you need to eject.

I'd say the same thing if I read this. I actually feel like I'm the one friend zoning her though. She seems too sexually boring to me. If I dont get a kiss in halfway through the first encounter them I've always gotten one by the end of the second, always. I can tell within minutes if its not going to happen. This chick actually likes me, I'm sure. The way she texts me... And she hasnt logged into her profile for two weeks. I think she likes that I'm being patient about this. She just seems clueless or too insecure as to how to be with a man. She's told me that her sister is slutty and tells her that by the time she decides to get sexual with a man he'll already have a family with another woman. I just keep talking to her because she's interesting to talk to about random things. But even that's lost my interest at this point. Im more aware of quirks about her personality I might not want to deal with long term because I'm not distracted by the sex since there isn't any. So maybe it's better this way. I think if I'd been getting sexual by now I'd be overlooking things. Now I'm about done bothering with it because I'm thinking I might not like her after all that way. She's kinda arrogant about her intelligences and personal success. Somehow she thinks we're compatible this way lol.
Ya I think I'm done haha. I might try to be friends with her but I'll have to find a way to make that clear.

 

[jc_80]

Let me rephrase the question here (I see this as a challenge and learning experience now).

In anybody's experience here, do some women actually want you to just lean in at any seemingly awkward moment and just kiss them? Or do you need to just step up the kino to get the mood right so that you're picking up a signal?

I'm kinda the guy that gets them out doing some activity somewhere and then quickly work into it. Like one I'm actually sleeping with now, I took her to the park and convinced her to let me push her on the swing set, then I just started working Her up that way and had my hands between her legs and her kissing my neck within 10 minutes.
This one chick I haven't kissed just doesn't seem like the type to do that. I'm at a loss here lol. I guess I'm looking for tips on how to get her to loosen up or asking if she's the type that wants me to just go for it. Never met someone like her before. Mayve some of you have.

 

[Eco-J]

She put you in the friend zone: insisting on paying for dinner; "no signal whatsoever she's down for physical contact"; stayed up all night talking w/o making a move.

Women do want you to just lean in at some seemingly awkward moment and just kiss them. Sure it's nice when everything comes together in a magical moment of eyes connecting, etc., etc. but its not uncommon for me to just lean in or say "hold on a second" - kiss them - and say I've been wanting to do that all night. And I can't imagine anything worse then asking "if she's the type that wants me to just go for it" - because, if she is, then asking for permission just killed it for you!

At this point, I'm not sure what you have to lose by going for it. It sounds like you can live without keeping her as a friend. She wants to go out with you - so take her out, have a couple of drinks, add a little kino, and lean in!

 

[jc_80]

She put you in the friend zone: insisting on paying for dinner; "no signal whatsoever she's down for physical contact"; stayed up all night talking w/o making a move.

Women do want you to just lean in at some seemingly awkward moment and just kiss them. Sure it's nice when everything comes together in a magical moment of eyes connecting, etc., etc. but its not uncommon for me to just lean in or say "hold on a second" - kiss them - and say I've been wanting to do that all night. And I can't imagine anything worse then asking "if she's the type that wants me to just go for it" - because, if she is, then asking for permission just killed it for you!

At this point, I'm not sure what you have to lose by going for it. It sounds like you can live without keeping her as a friend. She wants to go out with you - so take her out, have a couple of drinks, add a little kino, and lean in!

I've heard this often - if she doesn't want you to pay then she's friend zoning you. It does make sense. But that hasn't been the case for me (until now maybe). Most of the women I've been with like to pay. I'm not sure why. But it's never stopped me from getting laid or progressing to a relationship. Maybe this chick is different and friend zoning me lol. She seems to have a lot of money so I thought she felt she'd be taking advantage of me if she let me pay. I would never ask for permission to kiss. The more I think about this the more I think I just haven't wanted to kiss her enough to bother with it lol. Maybe I'll take her out and plant one on her just to see how she reacts lol. I'm not scared of rejection so why not just for entertainment. At this point I'm pretty much not interested anymore.

 

[Fatal Jay]

Dude you are in the friendzone, if you haven't made as much a kiss (and a kiss is something really small) then she is not interested.

She views you as the same way she view her girlfriends or gay friends.


You need to get her alone....tell her "I need to talk to you about something" stare her deep in the eyes, move in slow to let her know you are about to kiss her, then kiss her.


now two things will happen, either she will stay and let you kiss her or she will dodge you. If she dodges you say "ok then" and move on because you are going to waste your time.

Do not talk to her before hand about kissing her, you will look like a loser, just do it.

 

[jc_80]

Dude you are in the friendzone, if you haven't made as much a kiss (and a kiss is something really small) then she is not interested.

She views you as the same way she view her girlfriends or gay friends.


You need to get her alone....tell her "I need to talk to you about something" stare her deep in the eyes, move in slow to let her know you are about to kiss her, then kiss her.


now two things will happen, either she will stay and let you kiss her or she will dodge you. If she dodges you say "ok then" and move on because you are going to waste your time.

Do not talk to her before hand about kissing her, you will look like a loser, just do it.

Makes sense fatal jay. Im realizing Im just not attracted to her enough. I haven't had that urge to kiss her. I'll look at her and think I should just because I'm there but don't want to haha or don't want to start so something I'm not sure I want to follow through with. Something about her is just odd. I've listened to her stories about being alone so long and not getting past a few dates with men, and I see why now. I've been looking back at all the times I kissed others for the first time and I'm remembering that irresistible urge compelled me to do it. It's just missing with her. I thought maybe I'd feel it eventually but I don't think I will.

 

[SuckItUp]

Think of it this way not making move quickly communicates you don't find her attractive so in response a girl will put you in the friendzone unless you move quickly. That's why you need to escalate quickly.

This girl lost as a viable romantic possibility so use her as a resource (social proof) or get her to introduce you to her friends.

 

[nismo-4]

Think of it this way not making move quickly communicates you don't find her attractive so in response a girl will put you in the friendzone unless you move quickly. That's why you need to escalate quickly.

This girl lost as a viable romantic possibility so use her as a resource (social proof) or get her to introduce you to her friends.

Read this and Fatal Jay's responses.

You always need to escalate quickly. If you ain't moving forward, you're moving backward. Standing still is moving backward.

If a woman shows interest, and you like her and want to take things further, ACT ON IT! MAKE A F**KIN' MOVE! GO FOR IT! Call it what you want, just take action! Not taking action will make her feel rejected and cause her to either turn you down or friendzone you.

And when you do take action on her showing interest aka calling her bluff, she will either:

1. Get turned on because you took action and control.
2. Back away, likely because she just wants attention or a beta orbiter.

What do you have to lose? I made that error countless times before. Fortune favors the bold.

Case closed. I hope this taught you something.

 

[backbreaker]

I don't think you're necessarily in the friend zone, but I think you're defiantly on the highway there. I think she's just kinda wired like that from what you desribed.


I've had girls do me like that before but i knew they were ****ing other guys so i knew i was in the friend zone. it seems like shes like that with eeryone becuase she's just like that.


this is how you play it. spin plates lol. it's that simple. if she wants to be the girl who comes over and plays scrabble with you once a week fine you can do that, bt you're also going to be ****ing other girls at the same time. In the grand scheme of things if you have 3-4 plates a plate that comes over your house and plays monopoly with you once a week while paying their own way is not the worst thing on earth lol

if she likes you she will take it upon her self to up the ante if she doesn't, she won't.

this is the type of chick that gets all her dating advice from cosmo and has the "10 ways to get a man to fall head over heels for you" article taped to her fridge with 6 of the 10 ways having to do with hold out sex as long as possible. i would not yet take her lack of intimacy personal. The most intimate thing a person can give you is their time, and she's giving you that.

 

[Poon King]

If YOU don't care about getting what you want neither will the woman. A man who will give a woman a relationship WITHOUT her having to f*ck him is like an apartment renter not charging rent.

Sex is payment for YOUR attention. If a woman wants to keep your attention she must have sex with you. No exceptions. And once the sex stops the relationship stops. No exception. WHICH is why women looooove marriage. Because a married man is a castrated beta slave obligated to a relationship where payment to HIM is an "option" the woman can exercise.

If you can live rent free knowing the moron renter will never kick you out if you don't pay.. what is your incentive to pay? Likewise.. if a woman knows she can get a relationship without having to f*ck you.. what is her incentive to f*ck you?

SEX IS MANDATORY should be your #1 rule.

No sex.. no relationship. Simple as that. She will call you a dog or a pig. Too bad. Nothing in life is free and no one owes you anything. Nor do you owe anyone anything.. including a relationship.

My goal when I meet a new woman is to take as much from her as possible while giving back as little as possible. This is keeps them coming back for more c0ck.. as women believe if they f*ck you good enough you will commit or give them more. But idiotic men who don't require sex have nothing to bargain with.